I know that looks shouldn't count but is it possible to ignore physical attraction over just pure personality?

Question

I'm always telling myself to go by personality not looks and people are made in all shapes and sizes but I really don't think a lot of people live by that even if they believe that. I don't want to be so shallow and self concious and always care about how i look and how people see me(pretty or not) but i can't say that im not like that a lot of the time! I'm not mean about overweight people like some jerks are but i know that if i was overweight i would always be self concious and have self esteem problems and even though thats hard for me to admitt im wondering if other people feel the same way too. So please give me answers and dont think im some shallow jerk cause im really not at all!
Thank you!

Answer 1

We're programmed to find people who can give the best possible genes to our children. That means that yes, looks matter. Attractive parents have a greater chance of having attractive children. Attractive people have an easier time getting through life than unattractive people and they in turn have children with other attractive people. It's natural that you should want someone who could make the best looking children possible.

That being said we should pay greater attention to someone's personal characteristics and personality. Yes, looks are important. They are not the end all and be all, but they are important. People who say they aren't are in my experience, unattractive themselves, or very unlucky in love. As my mother once said, "I don't think I could love and ugly man". Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, but the eye of the beholder has limits. There is a lot of difference between a man who is 5'10", 165 lbs, and moderately attractive and a guy that's 5'4" 300 lbs, balding, with bad teeth and bug eyes. We all have our own preferences as to what we desire in someone be it hair colour, build, height, skin colour, or whatever, which is find. It's hard to be with a guy you don't find physically attractive.

Attractiveness in the first filter so so speak, but after that there are a million other filters that people have to go through either consciously or unconsciously to meet our personal standards. If your feeling guilty about not giving the light of day to unattractive guys, go and sit at the mall for about 15 minutes, and observe all of the couples that pass you. In most of them, you'll find the man and woman are of approximately equal attractiveness. There's nothing wrong with that. Don't beat yourself up.

Answer 2

ok here's the thing with looks. they don't last forever. we all get old and age. things sag. hair is lost or it turns gray. we get fat, lose our teeth, whatever. personality is golden forever.

Now that is not to say that looks and attraction aren't part of the equation, but for me, if your personality is great, I am far more apt to be attracted to you. Don't get me wrong, I love a drop dead gorgeous man, but, what happens when gravity takes over and that gorgeous man is a total air head old man? what then will you talk about?

Answer 3

Its actual actual charm. If the exchange right into a warm woman crap character and a gruesome woman with a brilliant character and that i had to elect on. i could elect the nice and cozy woman. The stuff approximately having a brilliant character is a lie

Answer 4

hey you know i feel the same way but i think im fat and some boys make fun of me but i dont know if there just doing it for fun or they realy mean it

Answer 5

Physical attraction can NEVER be ignored.

I am not pretty and I know that looks are what matters only.
Personality doesn't matter these days.

Its sad.