how can I make my friends see?

Question

I have two friends who I have been close with for alomst 7 years. I am currently finish a semister in school and I am studying legal studies, plus I am taking 16 hours. I also have a job working 25-30 hours a week. On top of that I want to make time to spend with my boyfriend of 2 years. I recently have been getting the third degree from these friends. I just can't take it anymore. It seems like no matter what I do, i get my explanation thrown back in my face. I know I have not made time for them, but now they are making it up to me if we have a friendship, yet they don't understand that I don't have time! to drop everything and go out when I have tons of homework to do. I dont know what to do. I 've tried talking to them and they say they understand but I really feel as if they don't, because they are always putting me down. I need support right now with school and I can't seem to get it from them.... what do I do??

Answer 1

Your friends might be jealous. Drop them, hun. You are heading toward real success in your life and you don't need any flack.

Answer 2

These are not good friends if they are giving you crap about not being able to fit them into an already hectic schedule. You are doing what have to do to better you, are they going to take care of you? R your friends as ambitious as you? Doesn't sound like they are, that's why they can go out and chill, while you are juggling homework, a job, a bf, and barely able to squeeze in a moment for yourself. Sometimes when people don't have anything going on in there life they try to bring you down, they say, "misery loves company". Not that you friends are miserable or underachievers, but instead of just downing you, have they ever decided to help you out with an assignment or came and dragged you out the house for a few hours for some fresh air or just to spend some time with you. If not they have no room to totally fault you. Alot of people lives are like that nowdays, to include me. To solve the problem of never getting together with my girlfriends, we have 1 day out of the month were we meet up and hang out that day; it works most time and it is a designated day when we know we will get together. To get us thru the month we all call as we need to, but it is an effort made by all of, not just one person. You have to sit down with your friends and explain to them it's nothing personal, just business. They should be more understanding, and something needs to be done by all involved to salvage the friendship. If your friends insist that you are the problem, then that's their problem, you really don't have time for them anyways. All the best.

Answer 3

REAL friends would understand that you just don't have the time. I can see school & work. The boyfriend, yeah since it's been a couple years. BUT please don't tell me you've been say making plans with your friends & then blowing them off last minute for the boyfriend. IF not, cool, then they should understand. At the same time you should at least have one morning or evening in 7 days to spend with them. IF they really want to spend time with you & understand the time constraints you are facing, arrange a Sat or Sun morning breakfast once a week or bi-weekly & meet with the girlfriends. Nix the boyfriend on this particular outing as you need alone time with the friends. Understand?

Answer 4

Find better understanding friends! Your friends feel left out of your life and are shoving it in your face, NOT very nice! Take care of you, especially now pamper yourself, you need to be able to manage your work, school including tons of homework, and boyfriend, then friends if time allows. You could also make one day just for your friends and let them know that this is friendship day spending the time together, that fits into your busy schedule. Most of all have tons of fun you are young only once. Best Wishes and God Bless!

Answer 5

Find SOME time to spend with them -- even if it's once a month -- and try to make that good quality time (like don't go to a movie -- no point sitting in the dark and not talking!) Go out to dinner with them or something.

Answer 6

Explain your sitauation to them again and let them know how their attitude towards your life is causing you pain. Let them know you value their friendship and need them to support you in all that you are trying to do with your life. If they value you, they will honor your choices. Make plans to see them on a regular basis and this will probably help smooth over their feelings of neglect. They probably just really miss you.

Answer 7

You need to let them know that if they are truly the friends that they say they are, they would understand that you just don't have time right now. REAL friends wouldn't be treating you this way. Explain that to them. If they don't get it, you just focus on you and making your life vwork. Good luck to you hon.

Answer 8

If they are really your friends, they should definitely understand that you are trying to succeed in life. It's nothing wrong with what you're doing and if you choose to study or spend time with your man instead of hanging out, they need to understand that this is what you want to do. It has nothing to do with them. Worry about you./ You have the same problem that I've had and that is trying to please everyone but one thing that I've realized is that you won't be able to please everyone. Please yourself and let everything else fall into place.

Good luck sweetie.

Answer 9

You what? You have a full plate as it is, do you really need other people bring you down about the choices you've made for your life? I don't think you need friends like them.

Answer 10

Concentrate on school. It's your so called friends loss. You sound like a person who wants to learn and make something of themself. Go for it. There's always new friends.