I have a new boyfriend who is wonderful, but the smallest things trigger a memory of my past relationship and I start to cry. i find myself comparing and having a hard time adjusting to my new boyfriend.
2007-04-23 08:59:42 · 12 answers · asked by Celi 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sweetness this may never go away~ But, the memories with your ex will soon be filled with new ones, the comparison is a normal mind thing! So relax and enjoy god sent you this new someone, give it a shot memories are there for a reason and that is to remember where you come from~ God Bless and the best~
2007-04-23 09:03:49 · answer #1 · answered by private p 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First question--how long did you wait before you got this new boyfriend? Tha could be the answer right there! If you didn't give yourself time to grieve and be by yourself for some time, then you will feel all these things. It's not unnatural, but you owe yourself most importantly the time to get over your ex, and work on yourself. How else can you really receive and appreciate all the new things your boyfriend can bring? I wish you all the best!
2007-04-23 09:04:48 · answer #2 · answered by Lyfeizbutadream 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First thing to do is make a list of all the things that you hated about your x. Put everything you can think of in there. Then make a list of everything you loved about your x. Next, write a letter TO your x that you won't deliver. It's just for you. Say goodbye to everything and put your lists in the letter. Have a really good final cry and put the letter away. Eventually, when you can look at it and not cry, throw it away.
It worked for me until he professed still being in love with me 8 years later. I forgot almost everything until he brought it all up again.
2007-04-23 09:21:57 · answer #3 · answered by funnyface 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you shouldnt be in a relationship yet.It's not fair to your boyfriend that your wounds havent healed.It's not fair to you either:(We all need time to get over long relationships,sometimes jumping into new ones is harder on us than just being alone.We have to let go of the past to work on our future.Put the luggage down and think for awhile:)
2007-04-23 09:09:37 · answer #4 · answered by Alexis P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should really try some time alone. Jumping from one relationship to the next will do you no good at all. Everybody needs time to heal after a heartbreak. You need to learn to be happy with yourself without him before trying to bring anyone else into the picture. Good Luck.
2007-04-23 09:09:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's been 5 years and my daughter still cries. She has a wonderful boyfriend but there are still triggers of memories. I don't know how long it will take.
2007-04-23 09:04:10 · answer #6 · answered by luckford2004 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just have to take it day by day.I was married for 25 yrs. when my ex husband left.I was devastated.If I can get over it ,having invested 25 yrs,you can do it too !!!!!! It's not easy but you just have to learn to get on with your life.There will be good days and there will be bad days.You have to get up every morning and just live your life.It takes time but you can do it.Prayer helps too.For me I just woke up one morning and said this is enough,I deserve to have a good life and I am going to have a good life.You also have to stop feeling sorry for yourself.If you need medication to help you feel better,go to your doctor and ask for some.There is no shame in asking for help.Talk about your feeling to family or close friends,that helps too.Just know that one day you will be totally over him and it will feel like you are free.
2007-04-23 09:17:06 · answer #7 · answered by Teresa 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time is said to heal all wounds. It is going took take time. The best it seems you can do is to continue to try to avoid things that might remind you of the old flame.
2007-04-23 09:06:59 · answer #8 · answered by ejohnjr34 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Counseling - seriously, there's nothing wrong with it and it can solve a lot of little issues. Don't let the boyfriend be the case solver - it's not fair to him.
2007-04-23 09:06:34 · answer #9 · answered by A B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seems to me you still have feelings for your ex husband u did not give it enough time to get over your ex im goen threw a seperation and its only been a month and im not by far ready to start dating so maybe u should give yourself some more time gl to ya tc
2007-04-23 09:07:13 · answer #10 · answered by jewels 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋