Im pregnant and in love with my babys dad, he left a while after he found out i was pregnant, we kept some contact, and we slept together some times.He says he dont love me and dont want to be with me, a year ago I nearly destroyed my life when he left me, now things are getting worse and worse everyday and i keep on texting him and calling him, and i cant stop.He says im obsessed with him, but im not, im just in love and i cant control my feelings.Usually he is ok but can get very nasty, and when i text him a lot he gets really mad I want to be with him, but im doing everything wrong, i should hate him but i cant, can you guys help me?
Only answer if is to help me if not dont bother.
Thanks
2007-04-23 06:00:21 · 24 answers · asked by cc 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You should be leaving him all together. I don't think he is worth anything to you now. He seems like a very self fish person. Don't go crazy about him or he will hurt your more.
He is not worth your love. Meanwhile, concentrate on your baby. I don't think you should go back to him.
This may offer no help, but this advise will help you in long term. If he gets back together with you, it only hurts you more and the baby...
2007-04-23 06:06:04 · answer #1 · answered by YourDreamDoc 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Your baby's dad made the decision to move on. Yes, he hurt you, and of course you still love him, he is the father of your child, a part of you will always love him because of that. But as hard as it may seem right now, you need to switch off the intense feelings you have towards him. Deep down inside, you are angry with him and to acknowledge this will cause you pain but you need to grieve for the relationship, and see it for what it was - he was a callous man to leave you, and he not only rejected you but your child, too. Do you really want someone like that in your life? After he has caused you all that misery? Next time you think about calling him, think back to when you were at your lowest point - because of him. And tell yourself you deserve to find someone far, far better than he will ever be, and give your child a hug instead. Your child matters more than he ever will. Dont waste time and emotion on someone who does'nt care for you. If it helps, write down a list of all the bad things he ever did(or caused) while he was in your life. You will probably find its quite a long list. And when you start to long for him, read it. Remind yourself why you are so much better off without a man who caused you so much pain and turned his back on his own child. There is a better man out there for you, and when you put your ex behind you, you will find this man because you have moved on and become more confident. And he will be all the things your babys father was'nt - he will be kind, confident, faithful and caring. And he will return your feelings and make you happy - all the things your ex is not capable of doing.
2007-04-29 20:35:32 · answer #2 · answered by Marilyn's Sister 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try not calling or texting at all for a while. I know it is very difficult when you love someone so much, but the fastest way to make a man come running is to ignore him for a while. I do wish he could be a part of his childs life and maybe things will work out. Put all of your energy into your baby and leave him alone for a while....I would almost guarantee you that he will call or come by if he doesn't hear from you. If you aren't getting anything in return from him, think about it. A relationship should make you feel good about yourself, not miserable. I wish you the best of luck and hope things work out for you.
2007-04-23 06:36:24 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want to be with someone that don't have the same feeling for you? You should be thinking about your unborn child. You can never ever make someone want you, You are only making the situation worse by continuing to call and text over and over. You should get yourself some help so that you can be there for your baby. As hard as it may be for you, you should forget about having a intimate relationship with this guy and move on there's plenty of fish in the sea.
2007-04-23 06:21:13 · answer #4 · answered by tys200230291 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is time to let go of this guy and focus on yourself.
You are pregnant for God sakes. If he runs from you at this most important time in your life, then pray to let go.
Make a pact w/ one of your girlfriends that EVERY TIME you want to call him or text him that you are going to call or text her instead. Another thing, I think you should write, blog, journal about it. Talk about it. Go to therapy.Get mad, get it out of your system. But DON'T CALL HIM!! No matter what. He's not worth it!!!Trust me!! It's better to start trying to get through it so you can start healing and start taking care of you. Because your baby feels what you feel. And if you are not calm and mellow throughout your pregnancy, you may end up w/ a really fussy baby, not an easy going one, once he's born. (Just something to keep in mind).
Good luck!
2007-04-29 15:53:31 · answer #5 · answered by blazing_fire 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to move on. You can't force someone to love you and if you try the situation could get ugly. Let him go, it's going to hurt but you will get through it, Promise. Plus if he is getting nasty with you now, what will it be like in a couple of months? I really don't believe that you want you child growing up in a house where the parents are always fighting. Also, if you let him go you may find someone you love even more and who LOVES you BACK.
2007-04-30 21:13:34 · answer #6 · answered by eener_712 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to listen to some of these guys. Also realize that you're feelings are real but they may not be what you think they are and your actions are unhealthy for you and your baby. You're a conduit for everything that goes into the child and he or she does feel the stress you're under which doesn't help when you try to contact him because you keep setting yourself up for disappointment and subsequent stress.
Get help for yourself for the sake of your child.
If you don't have anyone there for you, take tweenthelines' offer because the one thing you don't need right now is to experience this alone.
2007-04-23 13:24:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Darl, don't let him use and abuse you anymore. You are way too good for that!
Every single time you think of him just keep telling yourself how badly he has treated you and there's much more ahead for you.
You have won because you have now someone so beautiful growing inside of you!
So put your energies into socializing with other mums and mums to be, read books and go on the Internet to find out more, because there is soo much more to look forward to now!
And you and bubs are very special in your Heavenly Fathers eyes, and He would never hurt you, not ever.
Ask Jesus to help you get over this man?
2007-04-23 07:11:26 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As difficult as this may be, you need to walk away from this guy and stop calling or texting him. It is very obvious he does not want to be a father. I know this is very painful for you and you are pregnant so your hormones are making it worse.
You need the support of your friends, family and a church. If you aren't involved in a good Bible believing church, find one and start going. You will find hope there and help emotionally.
You also may want to get in touch with a crisis pregnancy center. One that will support you and help you get good prenatal care and possibly help with some of your expenses.
I'm sorry for you and for the child but you are better off without this guy. The sooner you separate yourself from him, the better.
2007-04-23 06:12:43 · answer #9 · answered by Shmootsy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself, What do I love about this man? What has he done to earn my love? What will he do to earn our child's love?
Anything other than being good in bed? Cuz it sounds to me like your sprung off the penis but there are plenty out there that are attached to better men.
Look into the future and imagine how he will be treating you and the child. Will he walk out on you two again? Is he worth hurting your child like that? Is he worth seeing the hurt in your child's eyes when they feel like their daddy doesn't love them? I doubt it. Do you really want to choose a lifetime of misery?
He won't change and he has made that clear to you. If you keep fighting for him after you has treated you this terribly, he'll know that he can treat you like that because not only did you allow it, but you came back for it.
YOU set the standard for how people treat you.
Time to be strong. You'll soon have a little set of eyes and ears watching and listening to everything you say and do and forming opinions about the world from that.
It sounds like you're young and haven't had the opportunity to fully enjoy your life, but time for your wants and needs to take a backseat to the baby's.
Like Spike Lee says "Do the right Thing"
Good Luck Girl and stay strong
2007-04-23 06:28:32 · answer #10 · answered by VENTURACHICK 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why would you put yourself through this?
coping.org
you sound obseessed to be honest i would take a step back and find out what means what to you!
your pregnant andi don't want to tell you what to do but i would focus on your child instead of him!
are you eating healthy, what are you doing for yourself to reduece your stress in your life?
Over all this jerk don't want to be with you YOU CAN NOT CHANGE THAT only he can!
you can have control over your emotions -- it's hard as hell tho but you can do it!
if you really love this dude then let him go! if it was ment to be then he will come back!
look at this way you will always be in contact if you have a kid!
may not be the way you want it but you will always! I would also go talk to someone like a psycoligist and get a little more indepth help!
you have issues (we all do don't feel bad) but if you just ignore them then you can feel bad! Take action on YOUR life not his!
Best wishes and let him go you know you need to it will not be easy may even be one of the hardest things you will ever do but you will suprize yourself if you let yourself! :)
2007-04-23 06:12:03 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋