I have been married for about one year and now it seems that this marriage is all about him; (his wants, his feeling and needs) I gave up my house, my family, and friends, plus all the material furnishing, to move in to his house in another state. I stay at home and take care of the house, the yard and the pool. I cook and clean and make sure everything is done. Now the other day I ask for $10 to go to a rummage in the neighborhood and he had a fit! He said "he spends enough money on me". Now I have no choice but to find outside employment. I need money for little things and feel that I cant ask him for it. Is this a marriage or am I just his grounds keeper What is your opinion?
2007-04-23 04:16:19 · 12 answers · asked by Bonduesa 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Not being rude..But your his housekeeper and grounds keeper..Not his partner..
What you do is worth more than $10..Have you talked to him about this?? You need to sit down and talk to him about the way you feel..
If he doesn't want to listen..Perhaps you need to quit doing some of what your doing..Make him see exactly what all you do to keep a nice home..
Maybe you should call a local pool place..Get a handwritten estimate on what they would charge to come take care of the pool..Call a maid service and do the same thing on keeping the house..Perhaps even call someone who does meals for families and get an estimate on that..Show them to him..Maybe he will get the point..
I mean, I do feel a wife that stays home should take care of the home and make sure there's a good meal for her husband..But to not even give you 10.00..now that's just low..
2007-04-23 04:26:30 · answer #1 · answered by Havin' a good day.. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i tell you he should pay you for what you do. you aren't his maid or groundskeeper. i would be glad if i could find someone like that. hell it's only $10. if that's going to break him then he's got a little more thingss to worry about. He should also include you in on the finances. at least i think if you were you could see excactly how much he spends. sounds to me he has cost you a lot already. you might want to remind him of all you have given up just to be with him. sometime us men need to be reminded!
2007-04-23 04:25:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not working outside the home then you are doing what you should but if he is making you ask for spending money and turning you down,then you need a paying job. When you do then he should help out at home, don't do it all yourself.
2007-04-23 04:23:45 · answer #3 · answered by kitkat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would not consider this right. He sounds very controlling.
You should never give up everything, especially family and friends for a man. It will always bite you.
Not only do you need to find employment, but you also need to consider finding a new relationships and let him clean up for hisself.
2007-04-23 04:23:01 · answer #4 · answered by Ms Brown Eyez 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your more like a dog and he,s the master . You have a pool and everything ells what the hells 10 bucks . I would pat you on the head for being a good little dog and give you a bone.
2007-04-23 04:24:45 · answer #5 · answered by dad 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If he wants to be tight with his money then I suggest you get a job and stop doing his chores. You take care of yourself for once and stop doing everything to please him. Because in the end you will be tired and unhappy.
Im glad you realized this after 1yr and not 10.
2007-04-23 04:32:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Budget!
You need an allowance that is yours to spend anyway you want!
Get a good book on marriage finances and make a budget!
2007-04-23 04:24:25 · answer #7 · answered by me4tennessee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does sound like he likes to be controlling, some men are just like that I would NEVER give up my family for any guy. I did that once just so you know we never got married but it took him going to jail before i realized what a jerk he was and my family tried to warn me alot
2007-04-23 06:21:14 · answer #8 · answered by chiefs fan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a job then do not share your money.Dont let him see your paycheck and start thinking about leaving he sounds like a jerk.Im not saying divorce him but I wouldnt stay with a selfish man like that.
2007-04-23 04:25:43 · answer #9 · answered by butterflyspy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He wouldn't let you have a lousy $10 !
After all the work you do?
You have a big problem...
2007-04-23 04:24:22 · answer #10 · answered by Indiana Jones 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋