Not kidding. My friend is related to Mengele and I can't deal?

Question

I posted the other day. I was researching with a friend and found out conclusively that she is related to Mengele. I mentioned that she even looks like him and is in the same field. It freaked me out so bad and I think she could tell. Well, I told her that I couldn't do it. I couldn't even look at her anymore. She got really upset and told me how ridiculous I was being as we have been good friends for 6 years now. You have to understand that I have ancestors (Jewish) who died in the holocaust. I just can't get passed this. Am I a terrible person for ending the friendship? I miss her, but just can't deal right now. There is too much else going on in my life to add that to it. Is that wrong?

Answer 1

You one of the reasons that racism will not die. You have heard things told to you as passed down from others and you base your judgement about others on something you know nothing about.

Sure slavery, holocaust, etc... were terrible times in our history of the world, but when are people going to forgive.

With you making this a big deal you show your racism, ignorance, and inability to simply be a forgiving human being.

Maybe you do not deserve her as a friend. I would tell you to piss off and get a life.

What ghost are in your closet?

Answer 2

You should probably speak to your Rabbi about this, as it sounds like you have many large anger issues regarding the Holocaust.

My opinion (since you asked) is that you are making too large a deal out of this. If your friend is likewise appalled at Dr. Mengele's work, why should you hold his actions against her? Moreover, choosing the profession of medicine isn't that rare, why should it be blocked out forever to any relatives and descendants of one dishonorable practitioner?

Suppose your grandfather was in a car accident forty years ago, in which a man died. Later, you find out that you are best friends with that man's granddaughter. How would you feel if she terminated the friendship, because your family caused her family too much pain?

I think carrying that much anger and betrayal around will only hurt you in the long run, as well as destroying what sounds like a beautiful friendship. Good friends are hard to find, don't throw them out over things they have no control over.

p.s.
1/4 of my family died in the Holocaust, too.

Answer 3

Don't ask yourself if you're a terrible person for ending the friendship, because you aren't going to end it! Don't let something like that get between you guys. Your friend can do absolutely nothing about her heritage. She is nothing like him. If you were related to Hitler, would you automatically lock yourself up and refuse to show your face in public? No you wouldn't. You would think that, it's not your fault you were born in his line, and therefore you will move on. It's okay not see your friend for a few days to let the shock cool off a bit, just tell her you need a bit of time. Don't break a great friendship for something like that.

Answer 4

I a, a Holocaust Survivor and currently moderate a group a worldwide (in membership) Yahoo! group Remember_The_Holocaust. The purpose of the group is to honor the vitims of the Holocaust which include the people who first reared me as well as other relatives, by promoting tolerance and human rights. I suggest that you do the ssame and reestablish your friendship. Your friend had absolutely , I am sure, any connection with Dr. mebngele's crimes . It requires , in fact, an apology on your part. The fact that is related to him is completely not relevant., as far as I am concerned. For instance, the son of a first class war criminal who was hanged after found guilty by the Nuremberg War Crimes tribunal, Franck, married a Jewish person and certainly rebuked the acts of his father. In fact, just before he was hanged, Frank was the only one of the criminals who expressed remorse. Further. I personally owe my life toa Christaina German lady who whisked me away from my native Germany where i was reared by a childless aunt and uncle (subsequently murdered in the Holocaust) to rejoign my biological parents who had escaped to Belgium. otherwise I would have shared the fate of who I considered until then my mother. she was exterminated at Sobibor extermination camp on June 23, 1942 as I would have been too had i stayed with her. So, please , renew your friendship, And if you really care, join our group to learn aboutr the history of the Holocaust and promote tolerance and human rights. Best wishes to you. Freddy

Answer 5

Sha has been your friend for 6 years. Has she done anything to you that would make you stop being friends with her just because of something her acestors did way back when that has nothing to do with her today. She is not responsible for that. That generation is over. We are in the here and now. Live for today and not for something that happened a very long time ago, it's not her fault she has the heritage that she has. I think you owe her an apology.

Answer 6

This is the most absurd and childish thing Ive ever heard. And you've posted this Que. three times? and still not getting it?
You better research your own ancestor, I'm sure you'll find many flaws in them too! GROW UP!
I do not think you deserve a good friend since you've been selfish and self centred, with a wrong mind set!

Answer 7

Ask forgiveness for yourself and your feelings. They probably won't change, although you shouldn't feel guilty. Put the girl and her close relation to you out of your thinking right now. Good memories may be upsetting also.
You've got to protect yourself.
I went through this in a very small town way. I learned someone was involved in the death of a member of my family. He'd been questioned and cleared, although he was guilty. Before this death, I was cautiously friendly with him, after I never spoke to him again, and always felt lonely, and then of him and his family. It was very intense, and I always needed the company and comfort of someone close.
The good times we all shared were as upsetting as the last act itself. I did have to cross the street whenever I did see him, moved out of state. Every time I ever ran into a friend of hers, the first thing they said was "Did you know Joe is now living in Florida? Is he wanted for manslaughter, did they ever get him? Could you help put him in prison, he should be." And they would go on and on, from memories three to five years earlier. It tore me apart. My husband stopped it ASAP. As if I were a policewoman, and could investigate and solve this on my own. It was overwhelming.
The only thing I could ever want to communicate to him and his family, is you've taken the most precious person in the world to me at the time, you've made me so lonely it is unbearable, and I can't relive the memories to prove the law right or wrong. Please let my life as it is, and allow me to rebuild, with our happy feminine memories intact.

Answer 8

It's pretty sad that you're so caught up in this hysteria... your friend is in the same field as Mengele? So is Dr. Kevorkian... so was Dr. Jonas Salk...

Genetics only apply to eye color and a few other things... Anti-Semitism is not genetic.

You are being a fool.

Answer 9

Yeah, um.... you're overreacting. I can see where you're coming from but this is a little much.

She didn't do anything to you personally. Neither of you were alive when the Holocaust occured. You're being a little too judgmental--she can't control who she's related to. And now you just cost her a friend.

Answer 10

This situation can be hard to deal with if you know that you lost relatives in the holocaust. but just wondering didn't he start to fight for the jewish freedom?

Give it some time, let your friend know that you still want to be friends but you need space to work out your inner turmoil and you will talk to her soon