I have a 2 month old infant & I want a divorce. Do new mothers generally get FULL custody?

Question

My husband is verbally abusive, I don't trust my in-laws, and when we fight he threatens to get FULL custody. I am TERRIFIED that there is a chance that he would even get 50% custody, let alone 100%. I would agree to supervised visitation, but my husband doesn't pay attention to him now, so I am afraid of what it would be like when my husband has him without me. Once again...he is ONLY 2 Months old, and he is 100% breastfed.

Please give any advice you have!

Answer 1

I think your husband is just pulling on your chain .There isn't a court in the world that's going to take a baby's food away from it . Get a grip stop letting him run his mouth and scaring the hell out of you he doesn't pay any attention to the kid now do you really think he wants to raise it himself .

Answer 2

I agree with the others that he is probably trying to scare you to get what he wants.
It is very difficult to take care of a two month old child and a father who is already somewhat neglectful of him would probably lose interest pretty quickly.
I can't imagine a judge taking a breast fed infant from it's mom for more than a few hours at a time, but you must realize that there will come a time when your husband will probably have at least visitation with joint legal custody.
You probably won't get supervised visitation unless you can prove he's unfit.
One thing I tell everyone going through a divorce or custody issue is, get a court order right away and document everything.
Every time you husband is verbally abusive, write it down, if he messes with the visitation schedule, write it down. Don't ever be alone with him if you can help it so you have witnesses to his actions and if he is abusive on the phone, let him know you will be taping the call, he has the choice to continue the conversation or not.

Answer 3

Usually in a divorce, mom gets residential parental custody and dad gets visitation rights but both share in raising the child. You can petition the courts for supervised visits but you will need concrete evidence proving any accusations you make against him and definitely dont use hearsay as that will backfire on you. The courts also dont care whether you trust your in laws or not. The judge rules by what he considers to be in the best interest of the child unless there is proof to make him decide otherwise, but starts out with maternalcustody with child support, the house due to the child and goes from there. Hope this helps and good luck

Answer 4

I suggest calling a lawyer or crisis center and asking them how to go about proving the verbal abuse for when it comes time to go to court. You don't want it to be just your word against his. Document and keep a journal stating days, times, what he said and did, etc.
He will not get full custody. He is playing mind games with you because he knows how much you love the baby. Most men have bery little contact with the children when they are infants, because they are uncomfortable around them and the infants are harder to care for. They start taking more of a fatherly role as the child grows in age. Not all the time, but in many cases. It depends on the judge as to the actual time allotment but if you have verbal abuse proven then it could be supervised.

Answer 5

He will not get custody of your son. Those are the threats of a controlling and manipulative man and judges are well aware of those. Anyone who`s witnessed his verbal abuse? Take note of time and place of every treats. Also, give a call to the closest women shelter near you and share with them about your situation. They are there also to help women victim of verbal abuse not only physical abuse. They can have you out of there in a few minutes if this escalates. You should NOT be terrified in your own home! How dare he threat you and terrify you while you're at your most vulnerable after the birth of his own son!! Good luck Sweetie!

Answer 6

If the baby is 100% breastfed, you will most likely get sole (or primary) custody for at least a year or so. To prepare for the long-term, you should talk to a good divorce lawyer who's familiar with child custody situations.

Answer 7

i was told that they wouldnt take your child away at all until they are 18 months old..especially if you are breastfeeding..he will get visits usually about 2-3 hours at a time.

just remember, he is probably doing this right now just to scare you. most guys wouldnt worry about full custody unless they dont want to pay you child support .. thats why they usually ask for 50/50..

i wish you the best..you need to start keepting track of when he threatens you or does something bad...this will help you in court, i wish you the best....

Answer 8

Well you should be glad he did leave when you were pregnant, like my husband did..But more than likely you will have to have 50/50 custody. Breast feeding has nothing to do with it. You can make bottles, plus most men wont fight for full custody they just use that to scare you into not leaving with their baby. My husband is saying the same thing and our baby isn't even born yet. Its a control thing.

Answer 9

get out while u can.in most case like this where the child is and infant and breasted,most Judges will rule in the favor of the mother.if u can get a lawyer who can present ur case making his verbal abuse the high lights of ur concern for the safety of ur child and urself,u r more likely to win full custody.good luck

Answer 10

He can't get full custody unless you are unfit, which I doubt. And if he doesn't pay any attention to your child now, then his threats to TRY to get full custody are just that, threats. Sounds to me like he is very young and immature. You are probably better off without him around anyway. He sounds like an a$$.