When did feminism or being a feminist become such a bad thing? and how can it be fixed?

Question

to define the role of being a "woman"- yesterday, today, and tomorrow... Stereotypes – made feminism sound bad - the word that actually means something is now turned into a meaningless label / the adaptation of the word for a new purpose --- Reclaiming the word??? --- how to make it better???

(might be using some answers for a research project, just to show what you guys from all around think)

ps : no names or screen names will be used

Answer 1

Wow - good question! I was thinking about this the other day, actually. I was a girl during the "burning our bras" era. When I was in high school, girls weren't allowed to letter in soccer, only boys (although our team beat the boys' team in a "grudge match" game designed to put us in our places). I took a law class in high school, as the only girl, and had an opponent argue (in front of a visiting judge) that the judge should decide against me, because, as a girl, I was unable to think logically, therefore my arguments must be wrong. Nobody laughed (although I won the case).

Although the girls I knew wanted to be "feminine," and defined that as "delicate and soft," they also struggled not to be defined and contained by expectations. It was rough - we were often told (and told each other) that boys didn't want girls smarter, stronger, etc. than they were. Girls made a choice at some point to be less than they really were, or to be defined as weird, or too masculine.

See, right there is the problem. Just recently, California's governor, Schwarzennegger, said that people didn't want to drive hybrid cars that were "wimpy, feminine." We still equate being weak with being feminine (I'd love to see Arnold give birth to a baby - then tell me how women are "wimpy"). It's worth noting that although this quote was printed in a major news magazine, it occasioned no comment.

We still let people who don't know what they're talking about set the definitions.

How did feminism become a bag thing? Again, the wrong people took control of the definition. Even today, women who choose to stay home and raise children are looked down upon by those who don't. The movement left those women behind, didn't address their issues. It left no room in the tent for women who have real questions about the place of abortion and the government's role in it. Everything became "either/or," and the more narrowly feminism defined itself, the more people - including women - it excluded.

By doing so, the movement left itself open to ridicule, charges of extremism, and being sidelined. New generations of women growing up didn't want to be that narrowly defined by either side, which left them... no place. Increasingly, the moment became the exclusive property of college-educated, relatively well-off women, leaving those who needed its help most, those making low wages, without educational opportunities, as the natural prey for those who pandered to their fears.

It's interesting that if you look at studies, most Americans agree with many of the ideals of feminism (equal pay for equal work, for example), but women still shun the term. I can't count the number of women I've heard say, "I think I should be paid the same as anyone else who does my job, but I'm not a feminist or anything."

I can't blame many younger women for wanting to shun the term and being confused. They have fewer limits than their mothers and grandmothers had. They're also being raised in the most sexualized culture ever produced, where they're told from morning until night from every direction that their primary value lies in being "sexy," kittenish, disposable.

I don't know that we can reclaim the term. We need a new one, attached to a movement that advocates fairness and respect and sane, healthy living for all people. We need to start over, build on what was accomplished before, but leave the "my way or the highway" view in the rear view mirror. We need to define ourselves, and not make that definition too narrow to live with.

Answer 2

well, the thing is even though a lot of sexism has faded (and even racism), its still present. in some southern states i think, women are still degraded and paid less than men, etc. so really, feminists are out there also for third world countries where women don't have any rights at all. i guess feminism could be a bad thing because they are more promoting on sex, rather than both, but at the same time, they are promoting a sex that has been put down... and i think that really the word feminist just means to most that you favor women and hate men, when it really just means you're fighting for women to have equal rights as men and not that you necesarily hate men.

Answer 3

When? Sorry to be the one to tell you this, there have always been feminists and anti-feminists. Only the name changes. There's always been people who believed in some sort of power and equality and rights for women, although these have been different depending on the culture. And there's always been people who either dislike women or dislike women with power, equality, etc. I think what's changed recently is that first of all YOU are more aware, a good thing. And secondly, anti-feminists have changed their tactics and have resorted to using feminst language against feminists in such a way that some less aggressive women are afraid to use the term. But I looked the term up and it DOESNT mean any of the things the anti-feminists are saying. So regardless of how anti-feminists paint feminism, it still means what it means and not what they say it means. Hope that made sense.
How to fix this? Continue to be a good person and forget about lables and stereotypes. Treat everyone the same, like individuals, instead of men one way and women another. Use gender neutral language, don't discrimiate. Hear women out and don't only listen to or take advice from men. You know. The little things that matter most to people day to day. Don't tell girls they can't or shouldn't do something simply because they are a woman. And don't blame all males for problems caused by a few. If it would be bad for a woman, consider it might also be bad for a man and visa versa. (ie the draft...wrong either way, paying someone less than another for the same work...wrong either way, punishing one demographic and spoiling another...wrong either way). Demonstrate a belief in individual HUMAN rights and responsibility and no one in their right mind could stereotype you. If they are miscategorizing you, clearly THEY have a problem, so don't worry about it.

Answer 4

feminism is obviously about achieving equality. It became a bad thing when feminists actually totally forgot about equality and start trying to dominate the opposite sex. A friend of mine is a feminist and once we went shopping. There was a nice man who held the door for us. We were a little bit far away so the man was kind enough to hold it for a little while until we reached the door. It was common politeness. My friend was irritated by this because she thought we were weak and we couldn't open the door ourselves. It was ridiculous. And it's not just my friend. I've seen this many times. I think it can be fixed if feminists actually just stick to the idea of equality, not dominance. And I'm not pointing fingers at the feminist. we have the respect their beliefs but at the same time I believe feminists should actually follow their beliefs and not be too extreme with it.

Answer 5

From personal experience i have to tell you that i thought that i could support the cause and enjoy learning about it but you know what happend ? At a university i was taking a class and me and there was one more guy the only ones in that class and we still were supportive for the feminism cause. What made me puke and not to ever get envolve in this again was that all they were doing through the entire class time talking about how women are the best and how men are pigs and all the bad attributes that you can think of. So i thought this was a bad idea to support feminism. I was there to learn of what they are about and found out that they are racist and extremist. Never be part of that kind of experience again. I was able to see Pms on strike.

Answer 6

I used to hear good things about feminists but now all I hear is the word said with a smurk or frown .

I think we have to change the name or just say to hell with semantics and carry on with the growth of women in society.
Thats the most important thing and why we were feminists in the first place.

Answer 7

feminism or being a feminist has always been "a bad thing". it has always had a negative connotation and even feminists (like myself) say "i don't consider myself a feminist". People try to put a negative spin on certain words to shut down debate and make people afraid to associate with people "like that". just like communists in the 60s and anti-semitic. why do you want a label for yourself anyway. if you want to stand up for women's rights and promote causes that benefit women then just do it, you don't need a label.

Answer 8

I'm afraid it's just part and parcel with any militant attitude, which is true with any social movement. To reclaim the word from being a bad word, the reality of the feminist bad attitude must be reformed -- Which may be very difficult, as it is with any other movement that has needed reforming for at least thirty years. :( Feminism ws already a nasty word in the seventies!

Answer 9

I think that people still see feminist women as these angry, hairy, man-hating women, and people see feminist men as pansies. The fact is that, anyone that stands up for women's rights is a feminist. If you believe that a women should get paid the same amount for doing the same job as a man, you're a feminist. If you don't believe that women are somehow inferior to men, you're a feminist. It's that simple.

Answer 10

feminism started out ok but some of their thoughts now days are way to militant. equal rights is great as is choice. but many a feminist will look at a mother who chooses to be a housewife as a stupid girl. she chose to be a house wife isn't that what the main purpose of feminism is? I realize that many women are way to reactive to a woman who is as far as they see still a stereotype. but isn't that a choice of hers?most feminism these days is asking for some things others should get as well. we can't make fun of a woman in a commercial. but it is ok to bash a man in that same commercial. equal means equal. if a man gets 3 weeks vacation for 5 years of service she should as well. if a woman can get leave for a child thing. so should a guy. if a woman can get maternity leave a man can get it for taking care of the baby in it's first stages. if he chooses like a woman does.

nowdays we don't know what women want from us. if we hold a door open we are chauvenistic. if we don't open it for her we don't respect her. that is why I will not open or hold a door for a woman unless I would have for a guy as well. older people? no problem. really young or child? no problem. hands full? no problem. just because you are a girl? nope.