My husband and I just got married last month. I have only visited with his parents a few times, and spent a week with them the week before our vows. I love his dad, his sister and brother, and his cousins, but his mother (who is actually his step-mother) just seems awfully distant. My family was practically giddy when they heard about the engagement AND the marriage, and his mom is just kinda like, "ok.... so you got married..... alright, well nice talking to you, we'll see you soon". What the hell? I've never been mean or given her a reason to think I'm a bad candidate for a wife. But I feel like this is just the beginning, and I'll be fighting for her approval forever. What can I do, or why is she acting this way? Any advice would help, or if you've had a similar situation, please let me know!
God bless mother-in-laws! :-P
2007-04-19
20:27:34
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15 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
hi!Congrats on your wedding! It must be hard for you to handle you mother-in-law! Remember mother-laws feel as though they have lost their sons...just be abit Patient with her as this is a new adjustment for her... look at it on the bright side... you are not living with her so she cannot cause problems in your marriage, the only time she can is if your hubby allows it.
If she does'nt come around,,, i say dont bother as long as the rest of the family is fine with you
2007-04-19 20:40:08
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answer #1
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answered by Nes 2
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It may not be anything against you, it might be her personality. Maybe she is one of those people that need a little more time to warm up to you or anyone for that matter. Is his birth mother still in the picture? If so with the wedding and celebrations she may be feeling like an outsider. I'm not saying by you. It might just be an issue she has personally and needs time to work through it. Maybe invite her out for lunch and give each of you a chance to get to know each other better. Good luck and Congratulations. I wish you many happy years together.
2007-04-19 20:35:34
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answer #2
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answered by BhitchyPrincess 5
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I think this is the story of every married woman's life. No one is good enough for their sons and no matter what you do, you will NEVER fully win her heart so I would say focus on the people who respect you and give her a dose of her own medicine. Maybe she'll realize how nice and respectful you are to everyone else and turn a new leaf but I dont wanna get your hopes up because mother-in-laws never change.
2007-04-20 03:22:41
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answer #3
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answered by Luv Peace 4
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Ah yes, mother in laws :) I "had" the same problem with my mother in law when I first got married. Everyone else in my husband's family accepted me except her and my husband said it's because she felt like I was taking her son away from her. Well, the best advice I can give you is to just be polite and cordial to her when in her company. You don't have to "fight for her approval" forever. In my case, my mom in law is getting better at accepting me, though I'm not hoping for miracles.
2007-04-19 20:39:02
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answer #4
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answered by Leila G 3
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All I can tell you is that when one gets married, there is bound to have problems with the in-laws whether you are the daughter or son in law. All families have their problems but I think you should not let this bother you. To maintain peace and harmony between families, I think you should respect the in-law's wishes but just do the listening. I think it will work out better for both ways.
2007-04-19 20:33:42
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answer #5
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answered by Ashley 4
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hi Terry so why difficulty with marriage or living with everyone then. you look to have coated all the angles. i grow to be first married to a female who after some years desperate she wanted out being the so reported as bread winner and significant income i grow to be fortunate no babies so it grow to be a 50% and 50% chop up with the earnings of the valuables as that's right here contained in the united kingdom. the regulation grow to get replaced in basic terms earlier she desperate she wanted out. after this situation the prenuptial agreements between companions got here in so a concern such as you describe got here wherein constrained a number of this discomfort. so reckoning on the place you reside and what the regulation expects to a pair quantity does make it a fairer society. this may be a chilly tricky seem on the info which you have produced that are with out doubt the actuality. specific some pay very dearly for having babies fairly whilst they earn or have obtained money by using one skill or yet another. it is the place the prenuptial contract has saved many a guy and female from a debt ridden companion. through fact that's not continually a female that advantages. some adult males detect a wealthy female and pass approximately milking her fortune. the sleek %. carton guy grow to be a primary occasion she lay lifeless contained in the condominium for months earlier it her physique grow to be stumbled on. so that's not in basic terms one sided her family members might inherit whilst she died yet he wanted all of it in favour of himself. so in a brilliant form of tactics you're suitable no longer marrying or living with a companion because it is the comparable as being married at present as they equivalent rights in case you have been in place of abode with them for extra desirable than six months. so the different factor is a partnership approximately looking after one yet another even with the funds. it is the actual base line specific i'm married lower back for companion deliver often. she has might have extra to lose as my occupational pension is properly worth extra with me being right here and alive. in case you particularly should be relatively chilly coronary heart info approximately some relationships the prenuptial contract is the suitable answer.
2016-10-03 07:04:48
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answer #6
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answered by ? 4
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Don't even worry about it. If the rest of the family likes you, it'll soon become apparent that she's the one with the problem. Hey, it's the mom in law anyway, so you're not going to see her all that often.
2007-04-19 20:31:29
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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She sounds like a cold person. If you like everyone else in the family, then I wouldn't pay any attention to her. She probably has always been this way. Don't worry about getting her approval. Who really cares anyway?
2007-04-20 17:20:28
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answer #8
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answered by Patti C 7
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I would ask you how long you where going together when you married or did you just run off and get married and was she invited ... if not maby she feels like she is not important enough to you...
2007-04-19 20:34:42
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answer #9
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answered by Rock Star Outlaw 2
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My relationship with in-laws is an up and down type of thing.
Just love your husband and put up with the family.
Thanks and good luck
2007-04-19 20:37:16
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answer #10
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answered by Krazee 2
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