Will he ever marry me?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and half. Decebmer he took me to CA to meet his family and childhood friends. We live together. He says I'm his best friend and he talks about us growing old together. Howerver, he says he doesn't wanto get married for a long long time? after Med school. Thats like ten years from now. Do you think he really wants to marry me or he's just saying that?

He is very goal oriented and says he is in it for the long haul. I am also the first girl he's ever introduced to his friends. He's a very serious guy, and today he told me I'm already in. (his family). He does a lot for me and is also my best friend.

Answer 1

Ya know I guess I dont' really agree with the others. I've waited 6 yrs to get married to my fiance and we are getting married this October. We've only been engaged since February of this year. So it really depends on the type of person he is. If he is trying to get through med school, think of all the stress on both of you. Are you really wanting to add the stress (even if it is joyful stress) of trying to plan and pay for a wedding? And who better to spend the rest of his life with than the person who was there that whole time and helped him achieve his goal of graduating med school? If he's the type of guy that is honest and you have no reason to think he's cheating etc then just try to be patient. I know it sucks, I waited 6 yrs but when we do get married it's going to be such a special day.

Answer 2

I was with my boyfriend for a year and half too and we too lived together as well. The beginning part of the relationship was great except we started getting on each others nerves really quickly because we saw each other everyday. He mentioned marriage all the time and we just broke up almost 3 weeks ago.

My point is: Co-habiting in my experience is a big no no. What tends to happen to most couples is they get so comfortable and end up never really getting married. I mean, you are living together and sharing everything practically like a married couple. Guys can get so comfortable because they have all the benefits w/out an actual marriage. So why pop the question!

If he doesn't want to get married for a long long time, are you willing to wait until he's done with med school? 10 yrs is a bit much. You have to be selfish sometimes and think about yourself too. If he truly loves you, he will marry you in the near future.

Answer 3

The most important thing is what you want out of this relationship. Him being serious and a goal oriented guy is all well and good but what about you're goals? If one of your goals is to be married to this man, him suggesting waiting for ten years holds you back. That doesnt seem fair.

I am not sure he will ever marry you. Do you think him saying he sees you two growing old together is a hollow attempt to assure you he is serious about the relationship? If I said to I'm going to quit smoking but I am going to quit in ten years time, would you think I was committed to stopping smoking?

Could I suggest you have a calm, business-like conversation with him (marriage is a contract after all) about why he wants to wait? Is it really is for financial, career reasons etc. or is it for emotional reasons? Does the thought of getting married scare him? Be prepared to say that waiting indefinitely is not acceptable to you if it's not.

Answer 4

My sister went through this as well. Just remember though it has only been 1 1/2 years. My sister was constantly wondering if they would ever get married and every now and they would ask him about it and they would end up in a fight, because he just wasn't ready yet. They have been together 6 and a half years and on Tuesday they just eloped. They have been living together for the last 5 years. So don't worry, there is hope yet.

Answer 5

Relax sweetheart, I have been with my husband for 17 years. The first 8 we just lived together because he was unsure of marriage. But I realized that it didn't matter whether we were married or not, we were together and we loved each other and if marriage was in the future for us then it would happen. On our 8th year together we got married on my birthday. I am actually very glad we waited because the first 5 years of any relationship is filled with a lot of problems. It's not easy adjusting to another person bad habits and mood swings and we had some bad break-ups. I honestly feel that if we did marry back then it would have ended in tragic divorce and we wouldn't be together today. He is my best friend and my confidant. Trust in your love, you will make it. Especially with him in Med School, do you realize how much stress lies ahead? Just be his anchor and be there for him. Best of luck to you Sweetie and I hope I was able to help.

Answer 6

Ten Years. What is waiting on...Medicare? Does he want to play doctor on you....I wouldn't give anything up w/o a ring baby. I think he'll say anything at this point. Being goal oriented is no excuse for stringing someone along just to get some action. He can marry you while going through med school or whatever his plans are. Don't be a pushover.

Answer 7

I don't think he wants to marry you. If he wanted to, you would be married already, or getting ready to be married. There is no reason why you guys can't get married now, and why you HAVE to wait 10 years; none at all. People get married while in school all the time. I'm guessing that he feels you are ok for now, but something better might come along between now and the end of med school. If it doesn't happen, he *might* think about settling for you.

Answer 8

properly after relationship a woman bartender for almost 2 years, i might might desire to assert no. i'm an afternoon walker with a 9 to 5 and we merely on no account had lots time at the same time. Friday and Saturday nights have been given lonely. to no longer point out on our few days off at the same time she'd sleep to a million pm. And yet another subject human beings do no longer understand is while they get use to that existence it is extremely no longer straight forward to get them to need to alter it. i wanted her out of the industry because of the fact I felt that it had no real destiny, and that i did no longer want to make certain her bartending at 40. shes 29 now. She loves bartending and that's the place she needs to stay. i think of maximum adult males throughout the time of the honeymoon part of a relationship will cope with it, yet after a on a similar time because it starts off to subject them. In my case desiring something better for her merely pushed her away. i've got faith sooner or later she would have the ability to comprehend that it is not something maximum human beings do a occupation for a reason. So... might I marry a bartender. on condition that she had something else she grew to become into practising in existence.

Answer 9

I doubt seriously that he will. If this situation was valued on a scale of ten, with ten being the most either of you are presently getting out of this arrangement, how much can you say that you are honestly getting? 9? 2?

I think KiKi correct. Also, I feel that most women who "shack" have very low self-esteem and expectations. You owe yourself more than this.

Do you really think that 10 years will make a difference? People do what they want to do. If he really wanted to marry you he would.

Answer 10

Why should he buy the cow when he gets the milk for free? I went through this for about 5 years, and guess when he asked ME to marry him?? AFTER I left. Of course, I told him to stick it you know where (shortly thereafter had someone new move in). I really doubt he would marry you.... separate for a while and be strong.