How can my husband effectively prepare for court with his ex?

Question

I plan to be there, how can I make my presence of most use? She has not allowed him to see his daughter in months, and now she has filed a petition to increase child support and is complaining that he has not provided health insurance (which is not true, she has been using it).

What do we need to present our case for visitation. Also, if she wants child support increased, can we confirm that the money is being used for their daughter?

It seems really odd to me, that a husband would face off with his ex without his wife there. They were never married, and all decision effect me directly. Do wives usually sit in the background when it comes to their step children?

Answer 1

Take proof of insurance. I can't believe he hasn't filed something sooner - like contempt if she's keep him from seeing their daughter.

You can't confirm the money is being used for the daughter. Support money goes for food, rent, utilities, clothes, etc. But there is a way around it in some cases - like paying for Insurance, child care directly to the child care provider.

He needs to talk to an attorney about how to enforce visitation.

Answer 2

Usually visitations rights are stipulated when the judges does the order for child support, unless for some reason he was denied visitation. If visitation hasn't been denied then he needs to talk to a lawyer about enforcing his rights as a father. As for you, I know you want to make the most of your presence, it is best if you to cheer for your husband on the sidelines. I have seen situations and they are not pretty when the significant other makes them self known, it just causes rivalry between both parties, and makes for a difficult situation. I know you love your husband and want to help but this is for the best. Once your husband enforces his rights than you all will have the benefits of spending quality time with his daughter.

Answer 3

First of all, make sure he has documentation to back up EVERYTHING. If he pays for insurance, have a copy of the insurance card and receipts from recent doctor's visits to back it up. You just sit back and keep quiet, as it has nothing to do with you in the eyes of the judge. As for visitation, he is entitled to see his daughter according to the divorce decree. If she does not allow it, then she is in contempt of court and it has no bearing on child support...they are two separate issues. As for how the money is spent, you can control nothing. As long as she is providing the basics for the child, she can spend the money as she sees fit. The best thing you can do is to help him prepare by doing as much research as you can to make the judge see that your husband is doing everything he is required to do. If your husband has not been given a significant increase in salary, then child support will likely remain the same. When you see the ex in court, be sure to look your best and smile as sweetly as you can the entire time and enjoy it when it irritates the p!ss out of her!!!

Answer 4

He should take proof of insurance on the daughter and also any insurance forms showing where they have paid on the girl and if he has any receipts for out of pocket medical expenses or any other expenses for his daughter he should have them with him as well. If he had visitation rights awarded to him then she can not keep him from seeing his child and the judge should make her let him have them. I am not sure but I think that in some states that the one with custody has to account for every penny of the child support but that is something you would have to discuss with the lawyer. I am not positive on this. Yes...you have every right to be there in support of your husband. My daughter goes with her husband every time the mother of his child takes him to court. I would not say anything though unless the judge asks you to put in your input on things. Just be there for your husband.

Answer 5

you could ask for an audit of money given to her for the child document all transactions get a transcript of medical and never give her cash always checks so you have proof if she is asking for more ask the court why find out how the child is being treated ask how is she getting medical treatment and not the baby maybe she has no job so that is a valid question fight for visitation but do not say she won't let us see his child so we stopped paying or something you might even get a good case for taking the child from her and making her pay child support if she is unwed and not in a good home but you are and have both of you to care for the child say so step up and say you want to take over the care of the child

above all document and gain info find her doctor and appointments you can't have her medical records but the visits are able to be shown there are so many questions I would ask before answering any more but don't forget to include documented cases of when or if you had visitation or were denied visitation if you could find her as an unfit mother that would be icing remind the judge you are a family and all the judge needs to know is how much he makes not yours there is really no reason you need to pay child support he does if the judge threatens to throw you in court for contempt then let him and talk to every reporter you can find make his choice haunt him make her life horrible talk about it find people to listen. I am tired of the blood sucking women who get as much as they can from child support
there was one who sued 2 guys for child support and the lawyer said pay it so you don't default. so they did but didn't know about each other. when they found out about each other they asked the judge for a DNA test to see who was father and asked for only them to pay it. she had a 6 bedroom house 2 BMW's and a live in boyfriend because the courts took so long in processing and she filed for 3 years back child support or something. they found out it wasn't eithers but was live in's kid but judge made them BOTH keep paying because the child at 5 was used to a certain style of living and therefore needed to keep the money. because they both paid they both accepted responsibility for the child. last I heard tehy were still fighting it in court. this case was one of the ones a senator started saying washington laws were to biased against dads and those who assume fathership of children about 3 years ago I beleive it was. forgot the senators name

Answer 6

Bring the proof of medical coverage and any insurance bills you may have to prove that she is covered and the ex is lying about using it. You cannot confirm who, what, when,where, or how the child support is being spent. All you can do is make sure she is not underweight, developing normally, and has adequate clothing/shoes for th weather

Answer 7

bring all proofs of insurance. contact insurance company and ask for records of copayments and claims made by her or her on behalf of your daughter. tell the judge your not going to increase childsupport unless they increase visitation. tell him to hide some of his assets by transferring funds into your bank account. being that your not married she has no right to look at your bank records or information. if she wants to play hard ball so can u. tell the judge your are concerned about how they keep a record of these funds and how they are used for your daughters expenses. try to renegotiate the money by stating u willl only make payments that are directly from bills i.e. school books, uniforms, food reciepts, day care, after school ctivities. all information should be documented.

Answer 8

court doesnt care who is using it, it is supposed to be for housing and feeding the child,, does she have a room and roof and food?

He has to tell the court she has not obeyed the last court document in which he had visitation this many times, and he also needs to show how he paid the child supported ordered by the court,, the court is not going to listen to ranting and raving by her or him, he just needs to have his money he has paid out, health coverage showing the kid is covered and the beotch has used it,, etc.

you wont be asked anything, it isnt about you, it is about the child then the parents,

Answer 9

Unfortunately, you cannot confirm that the money is being used for their daughter. My advise.. Don't be there. Sometimes, these things are very delicate and if they are settled outside court, it makes the process easier. By you being there will just cause more disruption to the already unhealthy situation. You don't know.. she may get more vindictive with your presence.

Answer 10

YOU should NOT be there. You are not a party to the action and in my 15+ years experience with family law a new spouse only makes the ex-spouse angrier and more aggitated. Let him handle this one on his own.

If he doesn't have an attorney, he needs to get one in a hurry!