Whatever happened to the "loner" at your school? Do you think you could have helped them?

Question

I went to school with a guy who was the typical "misfit loner" type. I never mocked him, or was mean to him, but I never went out of my way to be nice to him either. Several years ago, he was sent to prison for killing his girlfriend's infant (less than 6 months old). I have always wondered what happened that made him "turn the corner" from thought to action. I wonder if a smile or a kind word from somebody could have changed anything for him.

I know it's the "chaos theory", but I think that small things probably matter more to some people.

Answer 1

I was a loner until 8th grade. I hated school because I was an out cast. To fight back I failed everything most teachers were fools so I did what I could to piss them off. One science teacher treated me with respect. I got a 98 in science that year and barely passed my other classes. I graduated High School in 3 years, and went to a two year college for veterinarian science. If it wasn't for that teacher treating me with respect I'm not sure where I would be. Or who would be dead.

Answer 2

I think that is probably the best question I have seen on here so far.I cannot even think of anything to say right now because it is such a deep question. But thank you for opening up a new forum. Maybe after yesterdays shootings people will stop, and think for just one minute how just one kind word to someone who seems to us as "odd" could be the whole difference in their life. And just maybe could have stopped a tragedy like this from happening. I hope this will open up the eyes of people everywhere, and parents ,take the time to sit with your children about kindness,because that is where it starts.

Answer 3

No you're actually not cool. merely the shown fact that u make one in all those trojan horse deal of it and use the be conscious "cool" too many situations tell me ur extremely merely an previous goof. and then upload the shown fact that u seem to have forgot what YOU have been like at that age...ALL UN-COOL. What did you "roar" into the college lot in on a similar time as blaring Metallica? A Prius? in all risk. each and every cool person I even have ever met on no account even used the be conscious cool, they only are. of direction each and every newborn thinks daddy is cool, my teenagers theory I spun the international while they have been teenagers. Dude, yer an previous geeky dork, cope with it. while he realizes he ain't cool the two in some years(takes after dad) you 2 might properly be un-cool at the same time. until eventually then why do no longer you study to screw an previous 'huge block Cuda' at the same time and an previous 'pan or shovel' to pass with it. (Google them) while he does come around you have gotten a shred of real cool to coach and he would be pissed that he chanced on his lost pals putting out with you.

Answer 4

I was the misfit loner. Not the one you specifically knew, but a loner nonetheless and still am now even at age 24. Never leave the house, no friends etc. I empathize with the shooter from Virginia. Had a few thoughts of vengeance myself from time to time. A few kind words would have changed my life but no one cares and they continue not to.

Answer 5

i agree i have tried to be someone in my adult life that i wasnt as a child..i try to at least be friendly to the people that are a little more odd than the rest of us..and have actually gotten to know some ok people..

aleron i hope i didnt misspell your name..i am sorry you feel this way..i hope you can get out of your house and find something you can enjoy and meet people...have you thought about volunteering..there are alot of places that need help..and you end up meeting people you normally wouldnt..its something to consider..you being someone who needs a smile could give one to someone else who needs one and who knows where that ripple could go...

Answer 6

I was the loner at my school. Everybody thought I was stuck up, self-centered, snobby and a *****. I didn't talk to people at my school because I always found something wrong with people that would make me not want to talk to people, like they were too ugly, fat, ugly hair, big nose, ugly shaped eyes, bucked teeth, dresses like a slob, etc. I always held myself above everybody else. I judged everybody based on superficial things. I always wore something cute and sexy to school. I thought I was better for superficial things. I never got to know anybody. I was bullied for that. I got revenge and made everybody's life hell at school. I called people ugly, insulted their clothes, and everything I could think of, turned people in if they did the least little thing, I made one girl's (who happened to be part asian) life hell because she was popular and had an outgoing personality and I had no friends but wanted some. I called her an ugly whore in front of the whole school, I said really nasty things based on how she looked. I made her cry and want to commit suicide. She ended up getting addicted to drugs maybe to deal with the nasty things I said about her. I got my revenge by doing "Mean Girls" things to other people. Nobody messes with me! I never did anything violent but I was mean as a snake verbally. I never thought of myself as an outcast or a "loser". I thought of myself as superior and I thought of THEM as ugly, fat "losers"

Now I'm 21 years old and looking to meet friends. And today I'm deathly afraid of gaining weight and becoming fat, I starve myself and some people think I have an eating disorder.

If people didn't bully me and I had friends maybe I wouldn't have pulled the"Mean Girls" stunt at school and made everybody's life hell.

Answer 7

If something like this inspires you to take the a look at how you treat other people, you have my blessing.

My rule is cruelty always begets cruelty, violence always begets violence. If only kindness was as contagious, the world be a better place.

Answer 8

I don't remember the loner at my school. I was teased and bullied, though, but I wasn't really a loner.

Answer 9

I was and am sort of a loner and ended up running a very successful business. Don't generalize. Not all loners are psycho killers just like not all liberals are morons.....

Answer 10

Whatever you do, don't start thinking that "if I had only been more nice", then things might not have happened. I am sure he has had lot's of people be nice to him in his life.
I thought if I was nice to my ex's nefew then he would be different, but even after he kicked a 10 year herion habit (while in my care), and was looked after for a while . he still had weird killing fantisies and satanic thoughts.
So who knows