my relationship has been good and bad, but he keeps hurting me. I love him with all my heart and he loves me but at this point of our relationship it is hard to get over everything and I don't know how to repair. We just got engaged, his family didn't know, he still likes to have female friends, but he says I am the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with. I want the same thing, but at this point I am angry and I don't think he is serious about us. I have threatened to leave him and he asks me not and he will change, but I don't know how to look beyond it. I have opened my mouth and everyone knows what we are going through and my friend says to leave him alone completely and I want him to learn his lesson and take some time to c if I am where he really wants to be.After I found out he didnt tell his family,my happiness left andnow I don't feel like getting married or at least having a wedding. It doesnt feel important to me anymore I want to be with him, I have just lost trust
2007-04-17 08:33:26 · 13 answers · asked by ucme 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
get a new bf and start over.
2007-04-17 08:36:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time. I know how two weeks often seems like a long time already, but if you keep count of how long it's been, it'll make things go slower. Face what happened. If it's because you lost a loved one, then come to terms with it. Get some closure. Information and forgiveness gives you that. If you manage to do the forgiveness part, then be sure to tell me how. Try to see the bright side of things. Sometimes it's almost invisible, but it's there. For instance, if you've broken up with someone, then try to see the positives in it. Maybe you just weren't meant to be. Then it was better that it was over rather than later, when you've invested even more in the relationship than you have now. There's always a positive side to things. You just have to look for it. I hope you mend your broken heart soon. Good luck and best wishes.
2016-03-18 02:54:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he's showing very clear signs that he's not that "in love" with you. If he's still messing around with other girls and didn't even mention to his family about the engagement, well then he's not serious about you. Why are you settling for less? You deserve better. If he's cheating on you now, he'll cheat on you when you get married. You need to cut him loose. Stay alone for a little while so you can focus and concentrate on YOU. Heal and restore from this bad relationship and eventually find a good man who's going to honor and respect his commitment to you. It might hurt a little now, but you'll save yourself years of pain and suffering. God forbid you bring children into this bad relationship. Get out now! Good luck!
2007-04-17 08:41:31 · answer #3 · answered by jazz_lover_25 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you can afford it get couples therapy.
Also you should read "Lies at the Altar" by Robin L. Smith
Its a dual effort to make relationships work. If you are both open to the idea of making some serious changes, good for you. But if the effort is only one sided or you two are working against each other, then the relationship will not grow, it will deform.
2007-04-17 08:38:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just try and move on, I know it's hard to do it, but it's the better. Try and forget him by doing other things that you like doing. And maybe in the way you find a good guy that can love you right. Or just try and focus on other things, love comes when it's ready to come. Don't worry
2007-04-17 08:59:27 · answer #5 · answered by cHicKy cHiCk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi ucme,
the good thing to know that, you are not alone with the broken heart there are millions and millions of people who are in the same boat as you (and i) are.....
i have created a web page for all broken hearts (like you and me) in this world, please go through the same
http://lovedevotee.googlepages.com/
if you have any questions, do write to me, will love to hear from you.
Keep Smiling,
Love Devotee
lovedevoteee@gmail.com
2007-04-20 16:18:39 · answer #6 · answered by Gyaan Guru 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"He still likes to have female friends, but he says I am the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with."
This is what you wrote, these are your words. The only reason you "hang in there" with a guy like this is because you don't believe that you'll ever be able to find a real man who truly loves you for you. This is not the truth.
Please, do not enable this turd's behavior anymore. Get rid of him like a bad habit, and do it today. You deserve so much better than this but two things must come first.
1) Cutting ties with your current user and abuser.
2) Thinking more highly of yourself. Please, please, think more
highly of yourself and you will draw the type of guy who is
real and truly there for you and not one who is just using you for a "backup" when he can't get what he really wants.
2007-04-17 08:50:47 · answer #7 · answered by soulguy85 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sellotape
2007-04-17 08:36:50 · answer #8 · answered by JackSummers 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not engaged if he didn't tell his family. Don't threaten to leave him unless you are going to stand behind it. But sorry to say, it's time to send the bum packing.
2007-04-17 08:40:04 · answer #9 · answered by Big Momma Carnivore 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ever hear of the saying once it goes bad it stays bad - go find someone else or something else to utilize your mind and get out now because it will cost you later even more pain if you don;t
2007-04-17 08:37:02 · answer #10 · answered by Frankee06 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself realistically, where would your marriage be without trust? People including you are going to do what u anyways, but never play the fool sweetheart.
2007-04-17 08:41:29 · answer #11 · answered by shane 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋