Can you be in love with someone who is not right for you?

Question

I have been in my relationship for over 4 years and wonder if you can love someone but not be right for each other? Mostly we get on well but there are issues that keep cropping up? Also do age gap relationships work? There is 7 years between us

Answer 1

i know exactly how u feel! my boyfriend is 28, i am 21, sometimes i feel like we are just mismatched, but i love him so much! i do think you can love someone who is not right for you, but i have to say, things are 90% good in our relationship and every relationship has its ups and downs! if its unbearable then dont stay with him, if you feel like u wanna be with him forever then stay! thats wat i am doing! if u wanna talk abt it, email me..
xx

Answer 2

well personally i think...yes u can love someone. u can love anyone if u want to as a matter of fact. but i don't believe there is a perfect Mr.Right for just 1 particular person.whether a person is right for u, u just can't tell. sometimes u'll just have to take that leap of faith. issues will always crop up even if u think u found Mr.Right. it's the natural order of things since 1 is male 1 is female. opposite feeling on things are bound to occur. age gap should not be a factor in realationships. coz if u love someone it shouldn't be coz he's the same age as you or younger or older? u love him becoz he's him. all the tiny detail of personality charactisisitics, habits and uniqueness is what attracts us to other people

i hope this helps and i didn't go off point >.<

Answer 3

Yes, it happens all the time. Four years is a long time. Do you live together, or plan on this? Some people don't want the same things, which is the reason i left someone I cared so much about. For you, you may want or need something crucial to your life, and he doesn't want this at all. Sounds like time to reassess.
If you are childless or plan on staying childless, the relationship has a good chance.
If you have children, you should choose for them, unless they like him as much as you, and he is good for them.
Seven years is some gap, although it is workable.
Is he bad for your financially? Do you get on better at home without him? Does he intentionally make priorities so you are almost last on the list? If this is the case, end the relation.
Good luck

Answer 4

Of course you can love someone who is not right for you!!! You did not elaborate on the issues that keep cropping up but if they are serious and you really feel you are not right for each other then break up and move on to a better life. I think age differences do matter but 7 years is not that much really.

Answer 5

Of course the age doesn't have anything to do with it. Unless you are like 13 and he is 20, then yes! But as far as older people are concerned, 7 years isn't that much. And you can DEFINITLY be in "love" with someone that is not right for you. It happens all the time. Women think that they are "in love" and the guy treats them like ****. But I blame it on the childhood and how they were raised. Not to say that those particular girls have bad parents - Im just saying that their parents realtionship had a great effect on their lives. My parents have been together for 30 years and they argue ALL THE TIME!! I hate it. My sister now is in a relationship where her boyfriend hits on her and they just aren't meant to be together - but if you listen to her, "she knows what she is doing" I am only 21 but I have been through, and saw, more than my share. I have a strong mind and the little stuff like my parents arguing all the time doesn't effect MY realtionship - But my mom and dad have 6 kids and all of them have been on bad realtionships and they can't understand why! Hmmm, I wonder? lol Well probably because of their relationship and what they taught us. My marrage is GREAT! lol My husband is in the Army and he is just the most perfect husband you could ask for :) But before him, I had my days too. I think god id just giving me what I deserve. Thats how I feel about it. I never was hit on by my ex's but I dont let guys talk to me however they want. Meaning disrespectful or downing me. So I just move on, it's the best thing, especially when you have kids. I will be damned if I let me kids hear someone cuss at me and put their hands on me. I have two boys and if they see that then when they get older they will feel like it is ok. AND ITS NOT!

So anyway, now my parents cant understand why my sister makes excuses for him and act like she cant see whats going on. But my mom makes excuses for my dad all the time. You learn only what you were taught.

Dont be in a relationship if the love isn't comming from both sides. Arguments every now and then are fine. Its normal, but if you know the realtionship isn;t going to work out...... then why waste your time. You could be loved by someone else.

Good luck!

Answer 6

Firstly, age difference doesn't mean anything as long as you both are on the same frequency and also yes it can happen. You can love someone who is not right for you. I loved a mentally ill abuser last year. I did not understand his mind games and his hidden agenda about my money and status. Later on, it turned out to be that he is just playing and not loving and caring me. I got hurt so much but I learned many out of this experience. If you think that you learned enough and this relationship will not go anywhere then you might want to consider breaking up.

Answer 7

i know of 4 couples that are 6-7 years apart with the man being older and yes they are working well.of course you can love someone and them not be right for you but what is right? only you can decide what is right for you. my husband and i have issues that we have been working on for almost 7 years. every so often they pop up and we try to talk them out. i had doubts about us often before (alot of them) but as time has gone by the issues are less important and the bond is stronger.

Answer 8

Nearly half the world is in love with a person that ain't right for them...lol

7 years ain't much...

But sort the issues, what start as a mole hill can end up a mountain...good luck

Answer 9

age is a number, nothing more. they say opposites attract n that but i think you know if you are compatible, sit down, write a good and bad list and work the numbers out, a slight difference means nowt but a damaging landslide, time to think...good luck..

Answer 10

yea u can love the sky and the green grass he may just not be your prince charming