When he comes back he acts like everything is fine, but then out of the blue or when his kids come over, he suddenly hates our life and wants to leave and takes his kids and does separate things...we've only been married 18months and I am drowning in sorrow over this.
2007-04-16 12:01:36 · 20 answers · asked by msmissy81 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am truly sorry for you. The pain this kind of thing causes is terrible. Being the realist that I am, I say move on now and don't mess around with this pain any longer. You can't pound round pegs into square holes - never works.
2007-04-16 12:25:26 · answer #1 · answered by Mon-chu' 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
STOP taking him back. It's taken me a LONG time to figure out that people will treat us however we allow them to treat us. I know it hurts, but it's the cold, hard truth. You have shown him that he can do whatever he wants, including leaving you, and you'll still take him back. He knows it...so he has nothing to lose. You need to STOP this since it's only been 18 months. The only thing worse than staying in a bad relationship for 18 months is staying in it for 18 months and ONE day! (Dr. Phil) If you really want to stop your agony, then let this man go, and find one that will truly love and respect you. You don't deserve this, and don't have to deal with it, but you're letting him do this. Better off blue for a couple of nights, than blue for the rest of your life! He's doing these things BECAUSE HE CAN! Don't wake up when you've been in it for 8 years, and realize you could have stopped the drama "6 years ago"...and started a fresh, new life. Find the strength inside yourself to get yourself out of this mess.
2007-04-16 12:06:35 · answer #2 · answered by a_lot_smarter_now 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't you drown y yourself in sorrow.....because if he is not man enough to stay..then he is not man enough for you....next time he walks out....you stand in the door and tell him not to come back...have a neighbor to change the locks, and you move on with your life......you deserve better than this chub, A real man would not leave for 2 days and then return at his convenience.....stop letting him back.....when you do...then you are promoting this kind of behavior....and that it is OK for him to leave and come back....don't be that desperate....move on.
2007-04-16 14:54:06 · answer #3 · answered by mrs_endless 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Apparently he's too immature for this marriage. Tell him to grow up or not to let the door hit him in the *** the next time he leaves because he won't be getting back in. As long as you tolerate this treatment, he will continue to do it. You may be better off without him if your feeling such sadness at this early stage in the marriage
2007-04-16 12:07:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
next time he leaves, change the locks and don't let him back in.
This is a game and a power thing with him, why are you letting him play with your head.
He is mixed up in his own head, you are not the cause but you can remove yourself from this situation and get on with your life.....
This is a joke, he still thinks running awy is going to solve things... he might be running into someone else's arms one of these times.
if he wants to look after his kids alone, let him. you do not need this crazy behaviour in your life....
You have only invested 18 months, get out now before you ruin your life........
2007-04-16 12:08:13 · answer #5 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't hate me but it sounds like a real mistake was made when you were married. Either get professional help for both of you or cut loose while it is still early. Be strong.
2007-04-16 12:05:41 · answer #6 · answered by p2ponly 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The next time he leaves...change the locks. Go through the house packing his things. Put it all in the garage on your way to seeing your divorce attorney. This guy has problems he doesn't want you to help fix. Move on!
2007-04-16 12:59:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That sounds horrible for you, I'm sorry. Does he say what exactly he "hates" about your life together?
It may be time to consider cutting your losses and ending what sounds like a relationship that is circling the drain. Again, I truly am sorry.
2007-04-16 12:07:40 · answer #8 · answered by AK 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First you must tell him he can't keep leaving you like this, and tell him how it makes you feel.Explain that if he hates his life so much with you then he needs to just leave so you both can find true happiness., i know its kinda hard to do that,and you think you won't be happy without him......but think about it, or you happy now?
2007-04-16 12:05:54 · answer #9 · answered by ~Jessi~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get yourself to a good family counselor that can really give a fair view of the situation. It may be that your prince charming is a toad, or someone who just hasn't learned how to express his feelings, either way, a good counselor will help you find your way.
2007-04-16 12:05:00 · answer #10 · answered by OPTIMIST 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋