ok so my husband throws me around once in a blue moon and i am tired of it but i dnot really want to go i want him to change is there any chance of taht at all?? and if there isnt how do i just say he im gone?? without it hurting really bad?
2007-04-16 08:23:24 · 17 answers · asked by frogy_poo_87 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you say i'm leaving because i don't like the way you're treating me, it will hurt, after 4 years together theres no way to stop it from hurting except time. he should never shove you around even once in a blue moon that is not love if he won't seek help then you have to go. trust me when i say it's no life there is better waiting, good luck and God bless
2007-04-16 08:32:41 · answer #1 · answered by Ronni 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get out. It is not ok to hit your partner even once. There is a problem. It will hurt that is not a question but if you just take it one day at a time that is the best you could do. You just have to remember that you don't deserve to be someones doormat. To say goodbye you have two chooses. Leave him a note. Or just say that you are tired of the abuse and you need to leave and leave. If you have children then you need to leave so that they are safe and you don't want them to be living in that environment.
Good Luck and remember that there is a better life out there you just have to go and look for it. You can be happy so get a new life and find the happiness you deserve.
I wish the best for you. Life is hard but if you believe your dreams will come true.
2007-04-16 16:17:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next time he physically attacks you please contact your local police and report the abuse as it is against the law. Possibly going to jail and being prosecuted for domestic violence will be the way to get his attention. Also, as part of his sentence (probation) he will be ordered to get an evaluation and will then have to follow the recommendations which are normally completing an anger management program, or even better if available in your area, a 12-52 week domestic violence program.
If you are unwilling to do that then I doubt he will change because it hasn't caused him any pain so he doesn't have the motivation. Leaving him will cause you to hurt emotionally for awhile but family and friends will help you through it and you will be fine. Therapy would be a good way to heal as well.
Good luck.
2007-04-16 15:37:41 · answer #3 · answered by Stefka 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Violence in a marriage is a deal breaker! You have no idea how many ways that man has broken you until you leave. When I left, the utter peace that washed over me was unbelievable.
The first night out of the house I sat quietly. It was incredible. It had been five years since I was able to sit quietly. There was loud television. There were not emotional out bursts. There was no need to be on the defensive. The first night without my husband I remembered who I was before him. I felt at one with God. i was connected to my own self. I was safe.
Life with volatile man can submerge your spirit. It's time you come up for air.
Good luck to you.
2007-04-16 15:38:38 · answer #4 · answered by mediahoney 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's done it once he'll do it again. You'll be in the ER or a grave yard. Get out while you can. Even if you think its not that bad now, why take the chance? Not sure if you have kids but its telling them it is ok for daddy to beat mommy!
2007-04-16 18:05:51 · answer #5 · answered by texas_tonkatruck_girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why would you let him throw you around and stick around. tell him that its time for the 2 of you to go talk with a councler because you and he can not be happy living this way. do this in a calm manner that when he gets mad and goes off that you feel unloved/ un wanted by him that you love/care him but you know there will be a time that it will be gone give him so much time then if he fails to go with you leave him
2007-04-16 17:12:22 · answer #6 · answered by granny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh your going to hurt a lot more when you in intensive care ! Im male and I just don't get it !Why women stay with someone that will eventually kill you in some cases . You have got to get to a shelter if your going to leave and make sure the shelter is not in the same town . He will stalk and find you !
2007-04-16 15:29:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He throws you around and you're afraid of hurting HIM? He's not going to change. That's not how it works with abusers. Mostly it just gets worse. Be careful when you decide to tell him or have someone with you.
2007-04-16 16:56:34 · answer #8 · answered by dawnb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You tell him the next time he touches you, you are leaving him. If you have threatened this to him before, tell him, that he can take it as an empty threat if he wants, but to go ahead and lay a hand on you again and see how serious you are. And if he lays a hand on you again, you have to leave.
2007-04-16 15:29:16 · answer #9 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, he isn't going to change, don't you hurt when he throws you around? No one should put up with abuse, leave him. Your heart will heal and you will become stronger because of it. Good luck!
2007-04-16 15:51:58 · answer #10 · answered by Dbrown 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋