how importan is it to be love back if you love someone or in love?

Answer 1

Well, I will probably sound wrong or at least unusual, but if you think deeper in to the matter, I don't think it is important to be loved back. When it is real great and powerful feeling you've got inside you that makes the whole world much brighter and sharper for your eyes, when you start to see and experience life like never before, when everything suddenly gets some kind of meaning and makes that whole sense. It is all happenning with you only and in you only. I think we are maybe too often trying to believe that the other person actually involved in that which is in fact not true. The response to our feelings is probably important for our ego only, but that has nothing to do with a fact that we are in love, with all the tension and joy and torment and obsession and pain and happiness, that comes with being in love. To be in love is very very personal experience, that we have no ability to share. Yes, we can share our emotions and thoughts and maybe tell how we feel, but that's about it. The rest of the "ocean" is always somewhere deep in your heart. I remember I read a story of women whose husband left her after 25 years of marriage, and she wrote a line: all these years I thought he's been part of my love, but when he was leaving I realised that these feelings had been mine only - great love then and great pain now. So, I think it is a very precious gift to be loved back when you are in love, but not more. And you can never demand from the person you love to be part of your love - because whatever you do another human being will never experience anything for you or with you totaly, it will always be a different love, and different his/her experience. That is why the only way to be totaly happy in love is to give your entire self to another human being and enjoy the love that is inside you, which is probably the only thing you can own in that relationship. Don't know if it makes sense...But that's what I think.

Answer 2

First we have to address the question of what IS love. Not an easy one. Perhaps we can get a hint of a workable definition from the way you phrase your question: love is something you can give or feel toward another person, but that they don't necessarily have to give or feel back. And presumably, love is something good.

IF love is a feeling, then its location can only be the location of all your feelings - in your head. Emotions are not dependant on external conditions, and often have a lot more to do with your thought patterns than with external conditions. Two people in the exact same circumstances can feel VERY different things. Even in the specific context of love, many people can feel it as intensely for an object or a dead person as they do for anyone alive. If love is a feeling, other people are not necessary to produce it (though, as mentioned, specfic mindstates alter this conclusion - if you THINK you need to be loved back, then you probably do).

IF love is a pattern of behaviour, say a showing of concern and generousity of spirit, then that changes things. If love is something you DO for someone else, then it becomes much like any labour. A person who only labours in exchange for some form of payment is a merchant. If you only love people who love you back, then, you are simply engaging in a business transaction. I think most would consider that the lowest form of love... if they considered it love at all.

On the other hand, if love is a labour and you labour for people who don't pay you back, then that is a kind of charity and nobility that most associate with the truest form of altruism. Nor does this seem out-of-keeping with other conceptions of love. A parent might love a baby, but a baby cannot possibly love a parent in the same way. It may blindly trust, enjoy familiarity, and feel a need for its parents, but as a labourer it is almost worthless. Likewise for courtly love, where the object of love is completely unaware of her lover. These one-sided affairs are often considered the highest forms of love, and thus good support for this conclusion.

Thus, whether you consider love to be primarily emotive or primarily active, reciprocation is irrelevant. The best and truest love occurs whether or not anything comes back. Unrequited love is the sweetest of agonies, and returned love is almost divine.

Answer 3

Shakespear said "tis better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all". I can tell you from personal experience that love is not sufficient when you are doing all the loving. You can't make someone love you. If you continue in a relationship where you are not loved back, then you will eventually build up resentment toward that person. There is a fine line between love and hate. Loving someone who doesn't love you, turns love into hate if you stay and try to force love from that person. Love yourself enough to find someone who will appreciate your good heart and the love you can give. Don;t waste time trying to make someone love you. You can never get time back so use it wisely.

Answer 4

What's important is that if she says she loves you BELIEVE it. Love is more than physical contact and love is more than sitting in each others pockets all day, you still have to give each other space and freedom of speech, but the main thing is talk to each other WITHOUT letting things get out of control. keep calm and speak the truth, only by speaking the truth and remaining calm will your partner feel able to reach out to you and allay your worries.

Have just learned all this myself, seemingly too late.

Answer 5

when you are in love with someone who doesnt love you it feels like constant stabbing wounds to the chest every time you see them so being loved back is pretty damn important!!

Answer 6

Everyone need's a little love in return... Or even respect ?

Answer 7

it's hurting to love someone who doesn't love you back, just get over that and find someone who loves or appreciate you,

Answer 8

its not true love unless its returned

Answer 9

very very