I have been with my sons father for 8 years, I had left him for about a year then came back to him. well ever since I've been back with him things have changed on my part...I HATE HIM and everything he does, he on the other hand loves me to death........I want him out of my life but I don't want to hurt him...What should I do Please help me!!!....
2007-04-16 06:20:24 · 21 answers · asked by dimples23_2004 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are destroying his chance of having some one who loves him so what are you waiting for? Yes it will hurt him but he will have the chance to get on with being happy if you let HIM go.
2007-04-16 06:36:01 · answer #1 · answered by Dayla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok you haven't told us why you left and why you hate him. i mean did he beat you,cheat on you or what. i just don't get it. or did you fall out of love w/him. Hate is a very strong word to use unless he did any of those things i would suggest marital counseling to deal w/whatever is going on. and individual counseling as well b/c it seems like you have a few problems of your own to deal with,b/c you just don't start hating your spouse for know reason. you need to add details on WHY you feel this way b/c people can only give you advice based on what you say then you won't get any real suggestion on how we can help you. it seems like you need to figure out a few things in your life and stop running away from whatever is eating you b/c 1 it's not fair to your kids 2 it's not fair to him. the problem is that young people today don't know what marriage is. you do it and find out that it's hard work to keep a marriage going. i bet you were together longer than you were married and so when you finally got married you realized that is so much different than just shacking up and fornicating. so if this man loves you sooooooo much and hasn't done anything. YOU need to grow up and figure out just want you want and stick to it. but he doesn't deserve you're hatred if he hasn't done anything wrong. if you leave i hope you get yourself tohether first b/f bringing someelse into your boys lives and make sure they have a healthy relationship w/their dad. don't make them pay b/c YOU were unhappy. b/c the truth of the matter is boys need their daddies,again unless he was abusive to you or the boys. i stress this b/c i don't really know what's going on. i know people won't agree w/ me but i always speak from wisdom and truth, even if it hurts. i'd rather hear the real truth than having someone agree with me.
2007-04-16 06:51:46 · answer #2 · answered by freedom fighter 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In every marriage break-up one of the partners always gets hurt.
Just sit down and tell him you are leaving the marital home with your child and you are planning to file for divorce. He can contest the divorce as much as he wishes, but at least you will be out of the place you two share and begin a life of your own.
Once you live the home, go to Family Court for child support and set up visitation rights for the child. You both are a part of this child's life and the child needs to know both parents are working together to support the child needs.
2007-04-16 06:37:16 · answer #3 · answered by Patty G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have u ever sat a talked to him about what it is that makes u hate him. if u really hate him and there is no way you'll ever feel any different, whether or not u hurt his feelings shouldn't matter. he must have hurt u quite a bit to make u feel that way in the first place and if he is not willing to change, then why bother? u also have to think about the children and come to a agreement about how u can still be in their lives where the breakup will not affect the too much.
2007-04-16 06:31:50 · answer #4 · answered by chercinbob 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't state what your reasons are for feeling the way you do. If you are going to leave, then leave. Otherwise you are just confusing him. Its not good for your son either. It will always hurt, no matter what. Nothing you can really do for that. But if your sure about it best to make a clean break. good luck to you.
2007-04-16 06:38:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no way to leave someone without hurt and the longer you stay, the worse it will be for him. Hate is a really strong word. Your boys must notice the way you feel and that is not a good thing for them. You should take them and go.
2007-04-16 06:28:33 · answer #6 · answered by dawnb 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well I wanted to do the same thing..So He wouldn;t leave so I just left.Make it a point to him that you dont need him. Take you child and some clothes and leave to someones house. Right now I'm pregnant and it was hard to leave but sometimes you just have to suck it up and go fro what you know is right,
2007-04-16 06:37:35 · answer #7 · answered by ERICKSMAMA 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is a complete set up for failure. You must be straight forward and tell him you do not love him. You need to move forward with your life. Assure him you are not trying to take your son and that he will have liberal visitation rights, then find an attorney and get your papers filed.
2007-04-16 06:25:46 · answer #8 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to do what is best for YOU. Stop worrying so much about him, he'll get over it eventually. If you want him out of your life then YOU have to make it happen. He obviously is never going to change or leave so YOU have to. Gather up your courage and do it already.
2007-04-16 06:35:08 · answer #9 · answered by *Cara* 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, in this case, you can't have it both ways. If you plan on leaving, then do just that. File for divorce. If you honestly don't want to be with him, no matter how he feels, if you're ready to move, then that's what you do. If you keep going back to him, then your feelings must not be legitimate. I know that sounds mean, but it is what it is.
2007-04-16 06:25:22 · answer #10 · answered by suzlaa1971 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋