If you have a horrible next-door neighbor whose equally horrible family member has just died and they are going to have a get-together in their house on the same day and same time as you're planning to hold a birthday party for your 10-year-old daughter who has invited her friends from school, and you've never done anything special on her bithday before and she has been looking forward to this day for weeks, would you feel compelled to hold the birthday celebration somewhere else despite spending hundreds of dollars in decorations and food and invitation cards? I mean, this next-door neighbor has been horrible to you for years and just because one of them dies, you're supposed to give in to them and be "understanding"? I mean, are they within their rights to call the police if the party were to get pretty noisy while they are holding their after-funeral service mournful get-together?
The party is in the backyard and an extension awning has already been mounted just in case it rains (so has the neighbor's).
2007-04-15 23:10:25 · 13 answers · asked by threadsdistance 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Difficult one here - on thinking about it I would go ahead and continue with the birthday party. I do not wish to appear uncaring about the service taking place on the same day - but my childs birthday party would take priority to be honest. I know it is difficult through experiences of my own - cannot really explain further - just my gut' feeling so to speak.
Although I would add - perhaps you can address a sympathy card to the family and basically put a notelet in saying that your party had been pre-arranged and you at the same time are aware of their loss. Sorry I could not be more helpfull.
2007-04-15 23:17:00 · answer #1 · answered by deep in thought 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is a tricky one. Even though the neighbours are not very nice, my opinion is it would be good to teach your daughter that respecting people is important, even if you don't really like them. Also, though, it is your daughter's birthday and it is special, esp. this one. I would try and do a ring around to the friends' parents to see if you were to change the date by a day or two, or even make it the next week, could the children still come? Include any who were invited and could not come on the given day. If this is possible to do and possible for all or most of the children to come another day, I would seriously think about it. It is not the same as not having the party, even if your daughter is disappointed for a little while (disappointment is a fact of life, and this is not the same as not having a party). Do you have family or close friends nearby where you could move the party to? Or could you keep the party inside to start and go to a park later for playing games? If not and you still decide to have the party, maybe you could organise a basket of fruit or some flowers and take them over to the neighbours and offer your sympathy and explain the situation. Even if they are angry about it, at least you would have made some acknowledgement of their situation. I don't think it would be easy to get the excited kids to keep the noise down. Good luck - maybe someone else has the answer for you.
2007-04-15 23:41:01 · answer #2 · answered by Max 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
From what you have posted here, and with my attitude I would still go with the party. I would however try to keep the kids in line as much as possible. I would also keep in mind the time. I mean during the DAY as in dayLIGHT hours. Noise can be louder or at a higher level than it can be at night. So keep this in mind. If the cops do show up they know if the level is excessive or not and just to cover your backside as you could get a cop who knows and worse LIKES your neighbor you might want to RECORD this party. Good Luck and hope all goes well. Oh tell the Little one HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!
2007-04-15 23:57:21 · answer #3 · answered by GRUMPY 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think I would go to a different location for the party..McDonald's, favorite pizza restaurant,movie or maybe a rollerskating rink? If you do have a problem your daughter will be very upset and it isn't worth ruining the day for her. Maybe make a casserole or something to drop off at the neighbors home before you leave for the day just to save face.
2016-05-21 02:13:41 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact is, life and death happen at every moment. Joy and sorrow are acceptable every day occurrences. If my family had a death of an old person, I would be relieved to see children celebrating life next door. But then, I go with the flow. If my child dies, however, a birthday would be salt on a painful wound. You don't mention who died. To me, that matters.
2015-12-21 15:37:34 · answer #5 · answered by amiga 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead and have the party, maybe warn your neighbours. If they are as awful as you say, there may only be a few guests. Plus, you should celebrate the living more than the dead. It's like a little yin/yang thing going on, so it should be in harmony - theoretically!
2007-04-15 23:14:10 · answer #6 · answered by Mrs. Noo 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That's a bummer. Life goes on you know! Have the party keep the music down and have a moment of silence for the dearly departed.
2007-04-15 23:15:15 · answer #7 · answered by Mrs. T 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Birthday party no question
2007-04-15 23:13:23 · answer #8 · answered by Cpt. Amazing 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go to the party..
It would be unfair for your daughter if you went to the funeral..
:)
2007-04-15 23:15:54 · answer #9 · answered by Teri d 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ignore them. it sounds like your in other people business way to much. you need to find a good hobby. I like to read. you should find something you like to do besides gossiping about your neighbors, and it doesn't matter how bad they are you should be more understanding because at least your daughter will have many more birthdays. the neighbor who the funeral is for won't even have 1 more birthday. weirdo you need to get some perspective.
2007-04-15 23:18:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 6⤋