We were never married and have an eight year old daughter together. She married a guy who makes about $35K/yr. She makes about $60K/yr. I make between $200 and-$250K/yr. I mention this because I feel I'm being asked to provide what her husband cannot afford. I have no problem with celebrat-ing her as the mother of our daughter. But it seems tacky to me and disrespectful of her husband. He's a nice guy, about five years older than me (20 years older than her) and good to my daughter. She wants me to take her to the usual place that costs nearly $200 for two people and a kid to eat brunch on Mother's Day. She's starting to nag me now because she knows reservations fill up fast. Should I take her there for brunch?
2007-04-15 18:54:23 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I agree with a lot of the other people.. She's riding you for the gift.. It seems as she's nagging because her husband cant afford this $200 brunch so she knows you can and you will take her.. It is ridiculous that she thinks this.. Do not take her.. Buy her a nice gift chosed by your daughter and you can invite her to a nice brunch elsewhere that isnt as expensive... It's extremely rude to ask someone to take you on an expensive brunch when you aren't married, she probably left you and is now married... * I really do not think her husband would feel to good about this either..
2007-04-19 11:46:21 · answer #1 · answered by Ms Foxy Girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you should not be taking her out. If you feel that you should celebrate her being your childs mother then you should just make sure that your daughter has a nice gift to give her. You could maybe just wish her a happy mother's day. I agree that it is tacky and disrespectful to her husband. Be appreciative of the fact that he is being a great step-father to your daughter and show him the respect that he deserves. Unfortunately you are also helping your ex to be disrespectful of her wedding vows. Ask yourself this question....if she had been married before you married her and had a child with that man would you want him to be taking her out to expensive places--whether it was for Mothers Day or not? How would that make you feel and then think of how this man must be feeling when his wife is out with you no matter what the occasion especially when you are more financially able to treat her so well. Personally, I would say no you should not take her to brunch.
2007-04-15 19:12:10 · answer #2 · answered by susie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say no, not an expensive brunch. Maybe just a gift from your child this year. She is old enough now to make a gift for mommy. Take your daughter to make something for her mom and surprise her with it. Your daughter should take on the "mother's day" responsibility now. Maybe a card from you if you want to.
2007-04-15 19:02:56 · answer #3 · answered by Andrea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HI,Wow what a decision you have there.If no children involved that would be a very easy to answer.NO.Me being a mother of two daughters,myself,I would be so hurt and upset if someone did that to me.And,I wouldn't even do that to their step mother.How awful for her to be missing mother's day with her husband.Again,I am so sorry you're in this position.Are you single??LOL..I just posted a question where are all the good men at..well, i just met one.Good luck to you and you will be in my prayers.I hope you find the answer your looking for but I think you know the right thing to do in your heart.Follow your heart..no matter what anyone on here says..feel free to chat with me anytime you have a question. kristichick@sbcglobal.net
2007-04-15 19:07:32 · answer #4 · answered by gypsy2663 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say no. Help your daughter pick out something nice for her. After all its Mother's Day. Then you should just move on your life. Your responsiability is only helping your daughter financially and mentally.
There's not many men thats so understanding. Thinking of everyone feelings. Wish more guys are like that.
2007-04-15 20:03:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO!!!! She is no longer your financial responsibility - she knew the new husband does not earn what you do, she married him, now she must lower her standard of living and do without!!! The only reason the new guy suggested you take her, is because she has probably been harping on him and whining about it for months! She must be a barrel of laughs to live with.
She sounds like a spoiled brat. YOU need to stop concerning yourself with her all together - deal with your daughter, but you do not need to deal with her for any other reason.
2007-04-15 19:05:21 · answer #6 · answered by BikerChick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, get her a modest gift (such as a gift certificate for a massage), and a nice card from her daughter. Her free ride ended when she got married. It is his problem now. Move on. She will milk you as long as you let her. Take care of the child and tell her that she is her husband's responsibility now!!!
2007-04-15 19:00:05 · answer #7 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough one, and you are clearly sensitive to both your ex wife, her new husband and your daughters feelings. I wish more men could be so considerate. I would put it to your daughter and ex wife together and see what theya re both most comfortable with. You can't really put it to the new husband as it is not really fair given the disparity of income.
Your ex wife is lucky you are so fair.
2007-04-15 19:14:14 · answer #8 · answered by Dancing_in_Moonlight 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She made her choice let her live with it. Take your daughter and help her pick out a card. Move on with your life and find someone who appreciates what you do for her and is willing to stay in the relationship. Good Luck!
2007-04-15 19:04:10 · answer #9 · answered by I already miss him 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in case you're actually not detrimental to it for inner maximum motives, lamb roast is often a astounding take care of for mom's Day lunch. Tossed vegetables with oil and vinegar as nicely as asparagus and dinner rolls. in case you like a extra comfortable experience, decide on BBQ ribs and all the classic sides. Baked beans, coleslaw, potato salad, baking powder biscuits, corn on the cob... Wow! i'm making myself hungry! The BBQ would nicely be provided in a manner that makes it particular and not so accepted. in case you're making each little thing your self, i might surely decide on the BBQ menu. maximum of it incredibly is made the day in the past and heated at your mom's domicile. Saves you artwork on Sunday and provides extra time with momma! in spite of menu you decide on on, a house-baked cake with sparkling decrease daisies and toddler's breath as ornament would be an incredible dessert. shop the icing easy and grant sparkling berries as a compliment to the cake. mom's Day is in Spring, so your menu would desire to mirror that. easy and modern with the decorations and beverages. relaxing and festive nutrition. good success and function an incredible Day. rejoice with the time which comprise your mom!!!
2016-10-22 07:09:08 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋