We dated for 3 years when we were about 19 years old. She broke up with me because she cheated on me with her then ex bf. We are now 30 years old (9 years later) and have dated here and there. We are different (a little more mature) but still the same. I am confused about my feelings right now. I told her we aren't ever going to get back together (cause of the cheating thing and the breakup) but others tell me ppl can change. I don't know... really confusing feelings over here.
2007-04-15 11:47:07 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Beauty & Style ➔ Other - Beauty & Style
Dude sorry to say this, but you never get back with a girl that has cheated on you on the past specially if its been a while since you been together , theres always going to be the insecurity there, so you will never be happy, just go on with your life , you will find someone that will make u happy trust me, there isnt only one person meant to be out there, theres plenty... no one girl was made specially for you,
2007-04-15 11:51:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I am a 31 year old female who was once in the same, exact situation. I have been cheated on and have also done the cheating. Even if you take her back, you're gonna always think in the back of your mind that she's up to her old tricks. You have to ask, why did she cheat on you in the first place. Or what was her excuse. Has anything changed. Sure people grow up and change but very stubbornly. Maybe if she has gone through some things in her life that has changed her, like getting saved, then who knows. But honestly, maybe she's just tired of being "out there" and now is remembering the "good guy" she once had and wants 2nd dips. I say she's your ex for a reason, remember that. God may have such an amazing woman that he's working on for you, you can't even imagine. But you'll never know if you keep living in the past. Move on, she's not the only woman in the world.
2007-04-15 15:19:50 · answer #2 · answered by Chastidy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, before you read all of this you must realize I'm only 14. My boyfriend kissed this girl and then broke up with me and didn't tell me the real reason why until we got back together a few weeks later. I was really mad, but I forgave him and gave him a second chance. We actually are doing very well (except for the fact that my parents don't want us dating because they don't want me to be in a serious relationship until I'm forty), and there have been no more incidents. Just pray about it (that is, if you're Christian). It's all gonna work out. It really varies from situation to situation and life to life what you should do. Personally, I'd give her a second chance, but you should think it through. I mean, it has been nine years and people really do change. Good luck! Oh, and to Rene88, yeah, actually there is one person in the world God created specially for you. Everyone has someone that was meant to be with them.
2007-04-15 12:02:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend and I have a similar story. He cheated on me when we dated in highschool. 4 years later we got back together. People do grow and change. This is not a question that I or anybody else can really answer for you. It is based solely on how you feel. If you feel that it's worth another try go for it. In every relationship we encounter we are taking a chance. But also remember that it's easy to go back to something old or someone we already know because it's routine/comfortable there. Think about it, don't rush into a decision you could regret.
2007-04-23 11:09:32 · answer #4 · answered by mrs.jlittle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By all means have a drink with her, see how she is.
But a lot of water has passed under the bridge since then, are you really that desperate to go back down that route again?
You haven't been chasing her for the last 9 years, therefore you can't be that obssesed with her can you?
You're obviously single at the moment and you've got a bit too much spare time on your hands, don't fall for this trap!
If it doesn't work out then you will feel a double fool, for giving her a second chance.
I'd say no on this one, and find yourself someone else. I bet if you had another girlfriend at the moment you wouldn't think twice about dating her again.
2007-04-15 11:57:25 · answer #5 · answered by jojo5050 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch, I just got dumped in one of the worst possible ways. Being ignored from calls, text message and chats. Possibly one the rudest way, other than being cheated, to be dumped. I am sensing that you like the person now, how she has evolved into a person that you liked today. However you can't seem to get passed her old demonic ways, the way she cheated on you, which make you wonder if she is really the one. These feelings are completely normal for you. You have to trust your own instinct. You guys can just remain friends if you can't get over her past mistake, but if you can forget what she has done in the past, and I mean forgive and forget, why not give it a shot. Love sucks, I know, but we all would like to have one of the best times in our lives, experienced again.
2007-04-15 11:54:09 · answer #6 · answered by budaklolo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 31 and have been in a similar situation as you. And while it is lonely being single in your early 30s, I would have to say no don't get back together. The old motto of once a cheater, always a cheater is usually always true. i have been cheated on before and it was actually the best thing that my ex ever did to me. It showed me his true colors and opened my eyes to all of the other problems we had.
you broke up with this person for a reason. They hurt you. I know people always say that the people change, but we only change if we want to. I also don't believe you can be friends with somebody who has broken your heart. Why on earth would I want to be friends with somebody who stomped on my feelngs and emotions.
Unless you truly know that your ex has changed and has exhibited that to you, I would say move on.
2007-04-15 14:30:42 · answer #7 · answered by Lisa H 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get back together with her. It's been so long that she may be over her cheating phase. 30 is a lot different than 21. If you don't get back together with her, you'll always wonder what could have happened. If it doesn't work out this time, then move on. You may as well try it out for awhile!!
2007-04-15 11:52:48 · answer #8 · answered by Cathy 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if i was you i would not be going through the same old thing because it gets old and another thing i cannot run your life i can give you advice
if she cheat on you onces she will do it again you just got to remember there are plenty people in this world besides her if she does not want to do right get you a mrs. right okay lol!
2007-04-23 10:37:38 · answer #9 · answered by april j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should move on. Dude, you can do better. People can change, but you don't want to experience the same thing with her if you do get back together. You'd be kicking yourself.
Unless she's really hot... then just have some fun...
2007-04-23 08:00:04 · answer #10 · answered by xmanconti 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋