My family and friends think I'm gay?

Question

I'm a 23-year-old guy, but I've never ever had a girlfriend, not even a date. Yes, I'm also a virgin.

Because of that, my family and friends think that I'm gay. They are right, I am gay. But I don't want anyone to know that I am. Maybe if I were really ugly, I could use it as an excuse as to why I don't have a girlfriend. But since I am good looking, my family and friends keep questioning me as to why I don't have a girlfriend.

Whenever a family member or a friend asks me whether I have a girlfriend or not, I feel very uncomfortable.

I don't know what to do anymore; I'm not ready to come out yet.. I can't date guys either because I'm so closeted.

What can I do to make my family and friends to stop questioning my sexuality? Please help.

Answer 1

dude, it sounds like you have a family that is waiting and hoping to embrace the real you. My god, take advantage of that! All the awfullness you feel right now, the lies, the deceit, the guilt.......you can make that all go away, and it sounds to me like your family is there waiting to help you.

You've heard the expression, "it feels like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders"? Well, trust me, you will understand that phrase completely once you get the courage to move forward.

think about it.

Answer 2

Being gay isn't so bad...it's the stigma that people attach to it.
It sounds like they are on your side no matter what.

Your at the perfect age to come out since you are more independent than a 15 year old. You may be more financially sound than you were at 15. I would go for it. you should try crusing or gay.com or something that will help you discover who you are. Second Life is a good primer for the gay life you can go to gay clubs, bath houses and have sex. then you will discover what scene your into if any...
I am a 25 year old virgin with girls and i can say that I know enough not to want them. as a mate I guess. I am not a virgin with guys obviously and love the male race. start loving the male race dude cause you will never be 23 again.
find a twink on gay.com and go nutz dude,

Answer 3

I'm kind a in the same boat but only Im 46 years old and I've been question by strangers and friends and ex-co-workers. I just tell them that the right person has not been found yet, Start buying Play Boy this might get them off your back, or tell them that your looking into a singels group this might help.

Answer 4

You will know when the time is right to come out to family. My only suggestion is don't wait too long since life is short and you don't want to let it pass you by. It sounds like at this time you have some security issues relating to your sexuality. Don't worry too much about that, since it is perfectly normal, and anyone in the gay community can understand your predicament.

Give it time and don't obsess about the issue.

Answer 5

Andy,
Holy crap man, I was in your same position about 2 months ago. Good-looking, Single, never had a girlfriend, voted most popular, but people were talking. They were saying i was gay, just like in your situation, so i made one of the biggest mistakes i could have made. I got a girlfriend. She the same as me, good-looking, popular, cheerleader, and wanting nothing but sex. Tomorow is our 2 month aniversary, and it has been the 2 months from hell. I am so incredibly miserable, but I have to fake happiness just b/c of a few people saying I was gay. Don't make the mistake of getting a girl just to keep people from talking. It DOESN'T WORK. Just keep living your life, and let them keep talking. Its so much better that way.

Answer 6

initially, you will desire to no longer would desire to pay somebody else's telephone bill. i ask your self why she facilitates you to...is she making use of you and you're insecure and think of you will desire to do this to maintain her? It shows a loss of integrity on her section (that she might enable you to pay). it would be one component if she necessary help to pay one month and you probably did her a want yet this seems incorrect. i'm no longer gay yet i will relate to kinfolk pressures relating to love. you incredibly would desire to be who you're. they are basically slender-minded and illiberal. it incredibly is sweet so which you would be able to be taught that fogeys are actually not suitable and that they make blunders, too. jointly as you reside below their roof you will desire to do what they say, yet you in ordinary terms have one extra twelve months. Are you going away to varsity? even in the experience that your grades are not that good, see in case you will get right into a state college removed from domicile so which you would be able to alter into the female you have been meant to be. Vow to your self that this college twelve months you will do good issues for your self and plan the way you will stay once you swap 18. as quickly as you're on your person, you have the liberty to do what makes you satisfied.

Answer 7

1 of 3 things, tell each of them to stop, get a girlfriend, or get a boyfriend. Personally, I think you should just come out. I think they wouldn't be shocked if you came out anyway. And it would be more understandable if you didn't want to talk about your personal life then. Why won't you come out? Are they extremely religious or something? Just get it over with, it will help you breathe.

Answer 8

come on now. you are a big 23 year old boy now. it is time to stop playing the hiding games with your family. I will bet you that they already know anyway. don't be your own worst enemy and a hypocrite. open up and feel the pressure and stress go away. your family should support you no matter what if they really love you.

Answer 9

you might not want anyone to know but it sounds like they already do. just continue living your life and focus on things you like doing. you can't really stop anybody from asking you questions but if your friends and family members have emotional intelligence they will see that asking questions like that make you uncomfortable and will stop asking them.

Answer 10

you can date guys even if you aren'r out. it's just has more risks. if you aren't really ready to come out. tell them that you have not found someone that you can love or something. or maybe you could ask a close girl friend to pretend. but still you have to come out! good luck.