My husband and I both have adult children from our fist marriage.?

Question

We are both unsure of the most fair way to handle our life insurance beneficiaries and whatever inheritance as far as our kids are concerned. Depending on who passes away first, it could leave one side or the other's children with nothing if either should happen to re-marry. There is also the question of should the kids even get anything when one of us passes, or should we leave everything to the remaining spouse and then do an even split between all 4 kids when the remaining spouse passes and how would that be affected if there was a re-marriage? It is one of those things no one really wants to think about, but also a very important thing to already have in place to save any hurt feelings later or leaving it up to the remaining spouse to figure out on their own. If anyone knows was is customary or truely fair for all parties, we would appreciate your input!

Answer 1

Determine the value of the assets that you each had PRIOR to the marriage. These amounts should be willed to your children accordingly--your assets to your children, his to his children.

Any assets accrued after the marriage should be left to each other-they were accumulated TOGETHER so they belong to you both, not to the children.

Assuming you did not marry for money, this should be a fair agreement.

Answer 2

You get a policy divided equally between your kids, and your husband gets a policy divided equally between his kids. In addition, if you have a sizable estate, then you can either leave everything to the remaining spouse, NOT INCLUDING the life insurance policies for the kids, or you can leave some to the spouse and some to the estate, and then name the beneficiaries of the estate. It is not customary for stepchildren to be beneficiaries of their stepparent's estate unless you have been married a long time and the relationship is more parental....at this point, it is not. You both came into it with grown kids. I think that's fair, no one's feelings should be hurt.

Answer 3

My husband and I have it written in the will that the surviving spouse gets it all and then when they are gone it is split between the children equally. In the event of a marriage the will still stands any assets that we have before someone dies goes to the children after the death of the other parent.

Answer 4

First of all, the only thing you folks owe to any of your kids is not to leave them with bills. Other than that, a person who acts as a caregiver or assistance to you the most should receive more.

I think you should consult an attorney because state law sometimes can interfere in your plans.

For instance, my sister and BIL have set up a trust. They don't have a lot, but they do own two properties. If he dies first, everything goes to her, but if she dies first, everything goes into a trust. If there is any property left over after he passes, it is split between myself and his one daughter. His other 3 kids will receive photos and personal effects only. This is equitable in their situation.

Answer 5

i'm even greatly surprised which you got invited. you won't be able to be ignorant of the reality that there are various aspects that have brought about deep scars in his youngster's minds. even nonetheless those scars can fade, they're nonetheless there. this is clever to no longer %. this conflict of no rely in the experience that your toddlers are interior the marriage or no longer. And as for the 4 year previous, you already know he won't remember a element approximately it besides. As for no longer attending, i think of which you may bypass, yet do no longer make any fusses of any style and forget with regard to the stares you 2 gets from evil eyes. You 2 agreed to be acquaintances, and you may no longer could conceal at the back of a mask or wall because of the fact of shame or conceal thoughts of the toddlers. bypass and have a reliable time, congratulate the satisfied couple, and don't mingle too plenty interior the gang.

Answer 6

In our situation......we each have 2 adult chldren like you...when we married I doubled the amount of my life insurance...left half to my kids half to my wife...........of course any other assets would go to my surviving wife. in her case since she makes far less than me, I asked her to leave all her life insurance to her boys. As far as what happens if they remarry again, I personally think that the third spouse and their family should just be left out.

Answer 7

You need to get proper advice from a wills and estates lawyer.

Answer 8

Let a good attorney explain all your options and what will happen.