He used to like me. And when he went out with my bff I realized I loved him. Now he broke up with her because she got mad at him everyday. And he asked me out. I know if I say yes she'll kill me....even though she tells me its okay.
2007-04-15 04:28:53 · 36 answers · asked by Mila 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Just tell him how you feel about him, but also tell him that despite all of feelings you have for him, you couldnt do that to your best friend. But there is one thing about your best friend. If she was mad at him everyday she probably has some confidence issues, or didnt really love him.
2007-04-15 05:33:21 · answer #1 · answered by anna. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been there and done that! I am telling you that it could be either the best decision or worst decision you have ever made by going out with him. My friend and I hung out together since we were five. I had the exact same situation as you and I decided to make the move. However, I lied and hid the whole thing (worst decision you could make) and haven't spoken to her in 3 years. I even did the part where I asked if it was ok. Of course she will say it is to save face, but we all know the truth (especially if they were fighting a lot, there is some emotion involved.) So, here's my answer: Consider the base rates for both. Is it more likely that you will end up with this guy forever and the loss of your friendship won't matter? Or is it more likely that you will know your best friend for most of your life and have a short term relationship with this guy like almost all realtionships? From someone who was in your exact situation, find someone else and move on. Don't hurt the people who may be loyal to you for your whole life. I know if I could go back, I would take everything back in a heartbeat. I don't even talk to "what's his name" anymore.
2007-04-15 04:55:12 · answer #2 · answered by sweetness_44 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the situation were reversed, what would you do? If you'd be okay with your best friend dating your ex (esp since you say your bestfriend said she was kewl with it) then go for it...if you wouldn't like it if your best friend dated your ex, then don't do it.
I doubt you know this boy enough to love him...that takes a fair amount of time together to build...but it's plain you are attracted to him and that makes it tough to say no.
If you seriously feel she'd be upset if you go out with him, then you need to decide if her friendship, or dating him for a little while, is more important. Think about how short the duration of most teen dating relationships are...is that worth the price of a best friend to you?
And in the future, remember questions must be Questions. You did not ask one, and that violates Community Guidelines here.
2007-04-15 04:33:40 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She'll hate you and never speak to her again. It is ok to say yes if you can live with the following . . .
1. You'll never speak to her again except when she calls you a f*#&* B**&#, and runs off crying.
2. All of her friends and your mutual friends will hate your guts.
3. He'll get tired of you in a few months to go out with the only friend you have left.
4. You mother will still love you but say, "you brought this on yourself"
5. You'll wake up one day and think, "That guy is skanky".
2007-04-15 04:34:11 · answer #4 · answered by LorettoBoy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON'T DO IT.....your friend will not be okay with it even though she says she will. Guys will come and go but a true friend is hard to find. You have to be a true friend to have a true friend. Or if you do it wait until your friend moves on to a new relationship then approach the subject of you and the guy and see what she says, then if it is meant to be hopefully you will both still be single and available and no one will get hurt.
2007-04-15 04:38:40 · answer #5 · answered by ♥itsme♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's never a good idea to go out with a friends ex.
But, if you really do like this guy, you should have a sit down with your friend and explain that to her. Be rational and calm about it when you do, and just let her know that you're crushing on him, and really wanted to get the ok from her before you did anything with him because you don't wanna ruin your friendship with her.
Try that.
:D
2007-04-15 04:42:23 · answer #6 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
since your best friend still loves him, then it would be good to stay away from this guy. Whatever it might turn out, you won't wanna lose your best friend and be unable to face your own conscience. I believe a clean break is necessary. But things seems to happen too soon that its still far from being a clean break. One of the best reason being your best friend still loves him. So I believe as a friend, you should try restore their relationship and help them solve their problem.
2007-04-15 04:35:21 · answer #7 · answered by henry_fy7d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your loyalty to your best friend means more to you than this guy, what's the problem? Just put your hormones away and go on about your business. Or are you looking for us to tell you it's okay so that your friend won't get mad at you?
2007-04-15 04:31:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to decide what your friendship means to you. If you date this man you will undoubtedly lose your BFF. Think about your actions before you do this.
You and your BFF need to make a set of rules, and on that list of rules needs to be NO SHARING BOYFRIENDS. The choice is yours...
Also, put yourself in her shoes. How would you feel if she did that to you? This is morally wrong in my eyes.
2007-04-15 04:34:14 · answer #9 · answered by Mother of 5/Madre de 5 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is playing a cat and mouse game. I wonder why she got mad with him everyday, umm! Imho I would stay away from him. Tell him to come back and ask you again next year if he is sincere. Your friendship with your friend is too valuable to ruin.
2007-04-15 05:00:35 · answer #10 · answered by Marina 1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋