I live with my husband and 3 kids. My husband also has 2 other brothers in the same city with their families. Yet my mother inlaw and her unmarried kids always come from over seas every year and stay with us. I feel I dont have a house of my own they take over it every summer. My husband refuses to tell his brothers to take them in. I am only 24 I think i should have a say in my own home. What should i do?
2007-04-15 03:01:23 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You can speak up. Tell your husband to get his brothers to take them in. Share it around every year so your not stuck with them. If your husband is too gutless to say anything, do it yourself.
2007-04-15 03:04:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Making an overseas trek is pretty expensive now-a-days. If they can afford to stay elsewhere, it wouldn'tbe horrible to insist that they do; however, If they stay for under two weeks, then as much as it bothers you, you should let them stay there. That is just the right thing to do and really, what is 2 weeks out of 52 a year.
If they stay for longer than that, then next year maybe you should talk with your husband about them having a shorter stay.
Just remember, you run the risk of them deciding that you think they are bothersome and not coming for visits anymore. That would probably put a pretty big strain on your marriage.
2007-04-15 10:10:46 · answer #2 · answered by lxl_serendipity_lxl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow that is a tough one.Did you ever think that they enjoy your company more than the other siblings?It may be that.Or if they are a bunch of slobs you are the one who will clean up after them?What I would do in a nice way is ask them if they would not enjoy staying with one of the others and see what kind of response you get from them.And your husband should surely know why they stay with your family and no one else's and he owes it to you to tell you because even though you are only24 its your home to.Well Good Luck and I hope you have a good summer.
2007-04-15 10:09:09 · answer #3 · answered by sparky75us 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
NOPE, YOU DO NOT HAVE A SAY
IT'S THE MAN DECISION TO MAKE
BUT YOU CAN DO THIS
GET SOME CLOTHES AND TAKE
TAKE YOURSELF AWAY
FOR A LITTLE VACATION
TO YOUR NEAREST BEACH
OR A NICE TRAIN STATION
IF HE WONDERS WHY YOUR GOING
JUST TURN TO HIM AND SAY
WELL YOUR HAVING THEM HERE
AND I DONT WANT TO GET IN THE WAY
I WANT SOME TIME ALONE
TO THINK AND CLEAR MY HEAD
SAY - I WENT TO THE GROCERY STORE
SO YOU'LL BE SURE EVERYONE'S FED
TELL HIM YOU'LL BE BACK SOON
YOUR NOT GOING REALLY FAR
THEN KISS HIM BYE
AND GET IN THE CAR
THEN TAKE YOURSELF AWAY
GO HAVE SOME FUN
NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO
HE WILL GET THE JOB DONE
MAYBE HE WILL SEE
THAT HAVING THEM THERE IS HARD
I WOULD BET YOU THAT THIS TIME NEXT YEAR
HE WILL PLAY A DIFFERENT CARD
HE WILL SAY - CAN I GO WITH YOU
THIS TIME WHEN YOU GO
YOU WILL SMILE AT HIM
AND SAY -- UMMM , NO
ITS GIRLS ONLY AND
YOU'LL HAVE NO FUN
HE WILL SAY PLEASE
YOU SAY JUST STAY AND GET THE JOB DONE !
2007-04-15 10:15:56 · answer #4 · answered by lee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why can't you talk to your brother in laws?? Maybe you could arrange for them to spend a little time at each place instead of all the time at yours. Usually the inlaws want to stay where the kids are (their grandchildren). If you can't ask I would talk to your hubby about timesharing the inlaws instead of just trying to get him to not have them stay with you at all. Compromise!! Good Luck
2007-04-15 10:06:53 · answer #5 · answered by Scorpio 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the best thing i can think of is to get in touch with your mother in law and let her know you won't have room in your home for them to stay all summer long.
if you have a time period of a week or two, maybe that would suit them.
if they can afford to come from overseas every summer, perhaps they could afford to rent a place while there visiting.
i'm sure it's a big inconvenience for you -- i don't like it when people decend on my home either, relatives or not.
i don't know if this helps, but YES you should have a say in your own home. take care.
2007-04-15 10:06:18 · answer #6 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You do have a say in the matter, but you are talking about your husbands family. This is probably very hard for him too. Having to pick sides between his mother or his wife.
2007-04-15 10:06:20 · answer #7 · answered by dakota_gal_1968 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tough situation. Your husband refuses to respect your wishes. Tell him that you only have room for no more than his mother. He has siblings that can help. Suggest that he talk with them regarding this matter or that you will!. Is not right to put your and your children's lives on hold for his natal family. He married you and has his own family to care for.
2007-04-15 10:08:52 · answer #8 · answered by bountyhunter101 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You tell your husband that you want your house back and that you love his parents but they need to rotate their visits.
Or you could take it as a compliment that they choose to stay with you instead of the others and embrace their company and enjoy the time you get to spend with them and the time they get to spend with their grandchildren.
2007-04-15 10:05:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
when your inlaws call to say they're coming, say, "I'm so sorry we won't be able to have you stay here this year....maybe I can give you the name and number of a nice hotel? We can't wait to see you!"
and then stick to it (and make sure your husband is on board with this)
2007-04-15 10:05:10 · answer #10 · answered by BarbieGurl 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋