My girlfriend crazy or no?

Question

BORDERLINE pERSONALITY DISORDER?
How do I know if my ex girlfriend has borderline...see below
Please Help Me!!!!!?
I am in hell! I have been in the most dysfunctional realtionship for the last two years, The woman lies to my face, and tells me that everything is okay and then dumps via me email or text only to come back the next week. This happens because her parents run her life..they make her come home every weekend at 28 years old. She has left me and come back like 20 times in the last six months...Why am I not nbeing a man and saying enough is enough??? Why can I not say it's over to her? Why do I keep taking this abuse? Any thoughts would be great....I need advice on what is wrong with me??

Answer 1

She's just bad, dude. Join some men's groups on yahoo for support.

Answer 2

You've asked; "What is wrong with me". I know there is something very right about having the capacity to feel and give love, help, understanding and forgiveness.

Now, there is definitely something wrong with constantly breaking up, lying , leaving your partner 20x's in the last 6 months and breaking up without being kind enough to tell a person to their face.

You say her parents run her life:

I would guess that your girlfriends parents know a great deal more of why she behaves this way than you do. It might be a good idea to talk to or get to know them if you're girlfriend will let you.

Questions:

1. Are you a great deal older than your girlfriend?

2. Does your girlfriend have vice issues? Your girlfriend mirrors the behavior of some people that have drug and/or alcohol addiction issues. Many times these people take stimulants in an attempt to normalize the psych imbalance in their minds.

3. If you remove this woman from your life, do you have other woman or friends to communicate with and/or who would make you feel needed?

4. If this woman is suffering from psych issues wouldn't it make sense that her parents keep a tight rope on her?

5. Do you feel you are equipped to help her, influence change in her, and have you done so in the last two years you've been together?

If not, could you be locked in because you needed to feel needed. If so, I'm certain there are many woman who need a man who needs to be needed. Check out Yahoo Personals dating ads come equipped with pictures and message capability. I'm certain that a nice guy like you will find a nice woman.

6. While worrying, being abused, and trying to nurture and be there for her.....who's worrying, and nurturing you?

7. You describe this lady as pretty close to pretty bad. Yet she has a nice, respectful and faithful man, YOU!

If she with all her problems found a caring guy like you .....do you believe that you with so much love to give can find someone to love, respect and be faithful to you too?

8. Do you think you're worthy of love?

9. Do you think your love could be just a little one sided? If not, in what ways does she show you she loves, respects, nurtures, worries, and cares about you?

Personally, I don't think you have a problem. After all, she's not your wife. You can leave her at any time in pursuit of lasting happiness with someone else.

I would suggest this: If you are going to continue with this woman don't keep her around to fulfill your personal need to be needed only. You can help her and yourself by getting a professional diagnosis to her problem by taking her to a therapist. If you are working, most company health insurances provide for couple counseling - domestic partners included.

Decide to live and you'll probably decide to leave.

I hope this helps.

Answer 3

Perhaps you're scared of what reaction she will take when you strongly let her know that your relationship is over now for good., and there is no chance at getting back together.
She is 28yrs old...and can make her own choices in life....Do Not Allow This to Continue. You need to tell her face to face or over the phone, that You have had enough of this back and forth, back and forth..breaking up and getting back together...tell her ...it's not working for you and it's time to move on. Stand up for yourself, and put your foot down * You can do this as you Deserve so much better~* Living life, having Fun* and meeting new ppl that don't play games* No one can tell you "you're not allowed to break up with me"..YOU need to make your own decisions and follow through..... this is the start of doing that. You Can Do This* and Stick to it. Once you've said it, made it clear, there is no getting back together, you're moving on with your life and she should do the same.......don't answer/return her calls, no matter what she says. You can't stay friends with someone like that...You need to make a final break and stick to it* GOodLucK*

Answer 4

Nothing is wrong with you. At 28 your g/f needs to stand up to her parents and begin to take charge of her own life. And she needs to do it quickly.

You, on the other hand, need to decide why you have been in this relationship for two years. If you like what is going on, continue. If not, start dating. Things may not change for you.

Answer 5

i can give you all kinds of advice on this situation, but until you get truly tired you want get out. even with all the drama something is keeping you in the realationship? am 41 and my momma wants we to come home on my days off too. some people just have that family connection. but i have to admit in the last three years of being in my relationship i only go home about once a month now. it's more fun being home and waiting on him to get off work when our days off or not the same.
p.s nothing is wrong with you

Answer 6

Tell her that unless she sees a doctor or a psychologist to get diagnosed, you don't want to see her anymore. Yes, she has some sort of disorder. Being in a relationship with someone that has mental disorders is difficult, but it can work if she gets the help she needs.

Answer 7

It sounds like she's using you and using her parents as an excuse. She knows you'll take her back, so she can dump you and lie to you, and you will forgiver her. There are no consequences to her behavior.

I know you must love her, and it's hard not to take her back when she comes to you, but you've got to have more respect for yourself because she obviously doesn't have any for you.

Be strong and tell her no and see what happens.

Answer 8

There is nothing wrong with you. Besides being in love.
Your girlfriend needs to grow up.
You need to sit your down and tell her that enough is enough
Does her parents know about you?

Answer 9

it sounds like you are in a emotional abusive realationship. i know it is very hard to break up but you must.if she really cared aboout you she would not keep on breaking up with you and then coming back.next time she does that and than comes back i would just tell her no. "i am not getting back together witgh you. you have broken my heart to many times. i hope this helpes you alot!!! good luck!!!!!!!!!

Answer 10

sounds to me like it's a onesided relationship. how can u stand it? to me, u seem to love so deep and will put up with anything. trust me, I just got out of the exact situation, but this time I'm not going back.