We're all aware of the general question "Do I see myself with this person in 20, 30 years from now?" The question I ask myself is "What is it I can offer to this person/this relationship, to make him a better person, a stronger relationship?" and I also ask vice versa "What can this person offer me to make me a better person/a stronger relationship?" I want to know what your question is. Thank you.
2007-04-14 11:17:09 · 16 answers · asked by All That Glitters isn't Gold 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Do I really love him and will it be a forever thing!
2007-04-14 11:20:08 · answer #1 · answered by luckford2004 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I ask myself if the persons not so good points are going to be a problem, am I pretending they mean nothing, or do they mean nothing. And I also am interested how the other person deals with that. Another question is the ability to arrive at a compromise together neither feels they lost out on. Another; can we talk about anything?
2007-04-14 18:41:32 · answer #2 · answered by Chris W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whose going to manage the finances? Who is most qualified to handle the checkbook balancing? Will I be informed of all major purchases toward the household. Will I know all of our debt and be keep in the financial know about our personal expenses? Will there be children in this marriage? If so, how many? Is my husband frugal or generous? Will I be put on a budget. May I see your financial statement, i.e. last 3 years taxes? Do you owe back child support, how much, will it effect our income together? What are your long range goals and where do I fit in your plans for the future? Whose finances will we live off of? May I see your credit report? Will we save money and buy a home? Where will we live? Two cars or one? How many credit cards?
2007-04-14 18:31:15 · answer #3 · answered by Goodfor52 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION that you have to ask yourself before marrying a potential mate is this: "How does this person treat family members such as mom,dad,brothers,sisters,cousins,children family members,etc?" The reason I say this is because you can tell ALOT by a person on how they treat their parents,especially how a man treats his mother!! I would very closely watch the person whom you would be interested in dating because there will be that,"Honeymoon Phase,"where they will try to do and say all of the right things,but eventually that person will show their true colors!!
Watch how they interact with their family as well as your family. Is this person social,or do they just ignore people,are they rude towards people,and do they want to go off by themselves and be left alone? I am not trying to sound discouraging towards any potential mates that you may have,but just keep in mind that by the way a person treats their loved ones,is a pretty good indication of how they are going to treat you and any potential children that you may have with that person!!
2007-04-14 18:41:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Can I see this person as the parent of my children?
I think the way people handle kids says a great deal about who they are.
If I couldn't picture the person as a good parent then they probably wouldn't be my ideal partner.
2007-04-14 18:34:36 · answer #5 · answered by nailgal2005 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do I need to marry this person? Is it age? Is it society? Do I feel this is the best I can do? Am I willing to accept them if they don't grow as a person, (hint) most men stay the same after marriage. If he's a dog now...he'll be a dog later. If he's lazy now...
2007-04-14 18:22:30 · answer #6 · answered by jax0817 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is so easy to look at a person with "rose colored glasses", my mother told me to ask this:
Althought I can see the good points of my potential husband, what are 3 of his bad points, and can i spend the next 50 years with those bad points without driving us apart?
2007-04-14 18:32:35 · answer #7 · answered by Carol D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well i answered this one because i believe that to have a good relationship you must not need the other but totally just want to be with them to share if you are needy and they are needy then as soon as you or they cannot offer that any more then the looking starts so no need just wants and have fun
2007-04-14 18:53:03 · answer #8 · answered by justchecking 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I ask my self one "do I love him" Does he make me happy and Do I make him happy" Do we have the same views on how to raise our children" Do we have the same religous convictions" Are we both stable enough to make a relationship work" Can I handel all of his annoying little habits" Can he handel my mood swings" Most importantly are we bot willing to go the extra mile to make eachother as happy as we can.
2007-04-14 18:38:38 · answer #9 · answered by Courtney B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Mine was "Is he the type of guy to get down on the floor and play with the little kids?" - and he was, and we've been married over 17 years.
2007-04-14 20:04:17 · answer #10 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Is there anything more important than making love?" was the question I asked my fourth wife just before marriage. She said no, and it is excellent.
There is something about the question. It tells a lot.
Another one is: Do you agree to disagree?
2007-04-14 18:26:28 · answer #11 · answered by The Rabbi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋