When I started seeing my girlfriend we were polyamourus. Recently she left her other partner and hasn't approached a poly situation for a year now. She has said several time that she wants me all to herself. Now after we haven't been intimate for a few weeks and she just moved into a new home independently she asked me if it was ok to flirt with friends because she "knows" her personality and used Necking (Someone nibbling on her neck) as an example.
I felt that it would be normal in a *poly* relationship that is stable but since we haven't been intimate and her comments prior I am highly offended.
2007-04-13 19:10:00 · 5 answers · asked by Sukima 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
To clarify: We have been intimate for a year and a half. I have approached her in the past about poly and she experienced jealously so I stayed faithful. She stop wanting to be intimate or find time for each other for two weeks while she was moving from one house to another. In the process of the move she has developed some other "friendships." I talked with her about the lack of time and intimacy and she asked back about the necking and explained she just likes to flirt. I was offended only because she has not given me the opportunity for two weeks to attempt flirting with her. She doesn't call me I call her and I get a news update about her new life and nothing sexual. I realize this is defiantly pointing in the direction of a breakup I just don't want to be strung along. But I want to be fair to her if this is just stress. That is why I was wondering if necking was over the edge of "flirting."
2007-04-13 19:45:36 · update #1
Your gf said she wanted you all to herself but now she wants another guy necking her.That's not flirting b/c necking is a passionate act and can lead to other things since it makes women melt.But the thing is you started w/ a polyamourus relationship so you should'e thought about her having other partners before you committed/decided to be with her. If she is just doing this b/c you haven't been intimate, that's a problem b/c that means ya'll can't have a relationship w/o being physical and if that's the case...it will never be the strongest. But the important thing to do is tell her how you're feeling about what she asked. If you don't like it, tell her and if she cares she won't do it...but if that's the way she is or wants to be you either except it or leave if you don't want to be w/ someone like that. But you must tell her how you feel about this and ask her to decide whether she wants to be polyamourous or monogomous, if you don't want a polyamourous relationship.Maybe she is no longer interested in you and is trying to find an excuse to be w/ someone else.
2007-04-13 19:22:02 · answer #1 · answered by youngpoet07 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems she is still wanting to share, but you don't. Flirting is one thing, that's usually just eye contact and word play.
Necking, is going just a bit too far, and easily go further.
If this bothers you a lot, and it seems to, it's time to break up and find a monogomous relationship, with a decent one man type of girl.
2007-04-14 02:15:35 · answer #2 · answered by johnb693 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's trying to find a way out of monogamous instead of getting in it, as u do. Do you think you need this kind of relationship to last your life? Make your decision soon and be wise if you do want to settle down. You don't want children of multiple parents in one marriage, do you?
2007-04-14 02:40:17 · answer #3 · answered by Ladyluck 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she wants to play the field a little.
2007-04-14 02:20:22 · answer #4 · answered by Busy Lady 2010 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a relationship that allows both of you to see other people so why are you offended.
I get it you are worried that he might do her before you.
2007-04-14 02:37:39 · answer #5 · answered by Lou 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋