Why people believe their parent would know what is the most suitable for them in arranged marriage?

Question

I search the indian yahoo recently, I wonder why indian guys or girls believe and accept the decision made by their parent?Especially in their marriage decision. Why???

Trying to know the arranged marriage, trying to ensure my love would be good after marriage...I feel really hurt but I will try to manage it.I will try

Answer 1

Now listen dear in India whether some may call it culture others tradition, but as a parent myself of a married daughter will tell you what is most important factor is the experience of life which is with the parents that has more weight age in finding a suitable match for their kids. Who not make mistake in life, & if the parents have made it in their life regarding any aspect in their matrimonial life they will see to it the same mistake is not repeated by their kids. Kids in their youth get infatuated towards opposite sex person which they call it love, but after some time of their married life with the same person it sometimes comes to them as their biggest mistake of their life, which results into irrevocable breakage of their matrimonial home. The parental advice during their decision making in finalizing the spouse always help the kids to even see to those aspects of life that individually if they decide may ignore. A handsome looking guy or a beautiful looking gal does not always mean that he or she can be a perfect spouse but his or her other qualifications are also be seen while making any decision for life. In western countries the concept of divorce is very natural & being followed even for petty reasons but here in India the what is more important is matrimonial home for ones lifetime, although some matrimonial homes break & result in divorce but maximum matrimonial homes are intact for lifetime. The parents who have a successful inning of such a matrimonial home wants same for their kids & their decision in getting such a matrimonial home for their kids is their foremost priority. Kids here even if they choose a suitable match for they bring in parents to judge & approve the person keeping in mind the welfare of their kids. Although in India the matters like religion or cast or creed or nationality of the match is always predominant issue but with the time these issues are being ignored not only by kids but even many mature, educated & sensible parents. The most important issue which all parents see here is the general welfare of their kids. I hope you get answer to your query now.

Answer 2

In Indian family cultural customary traditional conventional setup there is a mutual trust, care and responsibility between parents and children.

There is a strong belief among all that matching of janma kundali helps in having more compatible characters together.

The marriage as an institution will have a more social back up to support the newly wed couples in establishing their families.

Hierarchical set up in the Indian families will bring more discipline in the family life and brings about a strong bondage between husband and wife.

Earlier the world of individual was quite small and was not stretching beyond few villages around. People used to know or could learn about each other before solemnising the marriage.

Besides, the elders help them in bringing up the children. and children will have a defined identity of the family.

Even today, arranged marriage is the best and long lasting

Answer 3

Because parents know the long term needs of their children more then their children themselves do. At young age we donot develop the wisdom to plan for extreme future. Although we are goal oriented but we still lack the wisdom. And when it comes to choice of a life partner, it has to be a one time decision. One cannot try working out with various partners. Hance parents are allowed to suggest a compatible partner. However, it's the suggestion that's accepted by the children. Once the suggestion is accepted by the children, they are allowed to met, given the time to know each other, and finally, they decide whther to go for the marriage or not.

Arranged marriage is not just about blindly accepting the parents choice.

Besides, success rates of arranged marriages in India are far higher than the success rates of love marriages. I myself have seen a hell lot of happy couples that went for arranged marriages, and a lot of couples in unhappy about their married life inspite of undergoing love marriage.

All the best...

:-)

Answer 4

Arranged Marriages are more successful than Love affairs. But in arranged marriages there is also a chance for failure. Therefore at this point God Guidance also make lesser the failure chance. God Guidance can be achieved by asking the God for the suitability of a man or women for oneself. In the dreams God guide a person whether this marriage will be successful in future or not.

Answer 5

People believe that their parents would know about love and marriage because they have stayed together for many years.
Unfortunately, staying in a bad marriage for 50 years does not really make anyone an expert in marriage and I have seen plenty of bad marriages.

In the west, they don't have to stay together if the love disappears. In India, most people do not know what "falling in love" means. Arrange marriage has nothing to do with love. It is more of a business deal where the families do all the negotiations.

In marriages where dowry is asked and given, its more like a bull being sold in a market for the highest price.

The main aim of arranged marriages is for financial and inheritance needs. That is why as soon as people get married, they are pressured to have children. If a couple decides not to have children, they are looked down upon.

People stay together in bad marriages to raise children. Actually its not a good idea because children are hurt by abuse too.

In a country with over ONE BILLION people already, I think they should focus on love and not on creating more kids.
When they change the emphasis from creation of more kids, it wouldn't matter if people married, divorced, stayed single, got widowed etc.

It is sad that people in arranged marriages do not know what "falling in love" means. And their parents didn't know what "falling in love" meant either. An arranged marriage is a friendship, a dependency, a business transaction, while people falling in love is a miracle.

Two years of a magical union is worth 40 years of misery.

Answer 6

Because in the Indian culture the parents look at their children objectively. They consider both the strengths and the weaknesses of their child and look for someone who will be a good complement. They also look for a family that will be a good match for their own in values and religious perspective.

Most who agree to arranged marriages in these situations understand that all of these things make for a good match and that if you focus your time, attention, and energy on a person who is equally committed to you, love will follow over time--a good, strong, lasting love.

Too often those in Western culture rely on their feelings to make decisions that should really involve so much more. They don't consider marriage a choice of a life partner, but something they "fall into" almost against their will. They will even go against parents who love them and want the best for them to marry someone based solely on their feelings.

Which way really makes more sense?

Answer 7

this is love & culture that makes up to do so. if you love to your family then all the decisions made by them seems good. we cant justify at that time, & if it happens good you proud & if its fail then you start complaining about that. if we have born in cultural family where decisions are made by the elders, then same thing arise in our life also. not about the girl but about the boy, I am confirm there is greedness. the greedness for anything respect, money, society etc.

Answer 8

Because they believe that marriage is a family affair and it unites two families, and strengthens the bonds between the families. Love, sex etc. are only secondary.

Answer 9

Thats because their families are conservative & orthadox.The parents select the suitable bride or groom for their son or daughter,also they don't allow intercast marriges for eg- bharamins cant marry other casts,also hindus can't marry cristians or hindus can't marry muslims.

Answer 10

Because this people trust the parents and they believe that parents has more experiences in they’re life.