Does counseling/therapy work? (to help marriage)?

Question

Everyone always suggests counseling but how many of you suggesting it have actually gone themselves? For anyone that has, did you find that it helped your relationship or just prolonged the inevitable?

Answer 1

In a way, yes, it does indeed work. You may find that the issues you have are fixable, and perhaps even petty. You may find that your problems are simply ones of communication, and that you, up until counseling just really didn't have the communication skills to make your wants and needs known without trouncing on the other's ego. And sometime, counseling is soooo late, that you find that your marriage is a long gone corpse, and there is no reason to stay

Go with an open mind, hon, and go agreeing between the two of you that you will be honest, kind, and yet open with your counselor. You should know in a few sessions whether or not it is fixable, and that you have issues to work on, or whether it is hopeless, and its is time to shake hands, be friends, and end your marriage.

Answer 2

My husband and I have been married for 10 years. Before we were married we got counseling. Then the first three years we did a yearly "check-up" on our anniversary. We were pretty happy, we communicated well, we tried hard to compromise and it worked most of the time. When stopped going yearly, our marriage went downhill, he went emotionally bankrupt, I had an affair, I threatened to leave and we are still shaky. I truly that if we had continued with the yearly "check-ups" the things that led me to the affair etc, would not have happened. But I also think it is dependent on the people involved. We obviously need a third party to air out our feelings, and help us resolve long standing problems.

Answer 3

Having been a counselor, I can say that it works, some of the time. It depends on the two people, and what they really want. Some people just go to counseling to go through the motions, or because the court requires it. Others truly want to keep their marriage going, and just need a little outside help to do it.

Answer 4

I am a counselor and getting a good therapist is important. It also depends a lot on the couple. Sometimes they come after it is too late. Sometimes they come and one of them has already made up their mind to divorce. They just go through the motions of counseling so they can tell the judge they went and it did not work. It is most successful when they are willing to work and take responsibility for his/her own part of the problems.

Answer 5

I myself has to admit marriage concealing works only if you want to stay involved...both of you. I've been through "group" therapy. Should have been individual therapy with just the two of us but group therapy was suggested by the counselor.
My own result is still looking for divorce. Her result is more emotion in the marriage. We were apart, the love began coming closer, but on my side that line became a straight line and only so close. She is still trying to make that line come closer.
There therapy is between the couple and who much the two of you want to accomplish with the voice of another to help you see the light at the end of the tunnel. You see if it works, the both of you with the same intention.

Answer 6

In my case, it actually saved my marriage. I'm completely convinced that if we had not gone to counseling, we would've gotten divorced eventually. Instead, we were both able to clearly see what we were EACH doing wrong--and what we were each doing right. Our psychologist said that he has never seen where 1 person is completely in the wrong, and the other is completely right, it's always both people are doing something wrong. We were both able and committed to changing what we were each doing that was hurting the other one, and to re-commit to our marriage and each other. That was about 16 years ago (our daughter was about 1 at the time), and we've been happily married ever since.

Answer 7

i think it helps if your open to the ideas and feelings that are brought out of it you both need to have the desire to change what is wrong with the relationship weather its you or the other person you need to do what you feel is right i have gone through it and have changed my ways and my opinions of relationships

Answer 8

No, it doesn't work. But God does.
Sit down and make a list of things that needs to changed and fix it.

Answer 9

Yes it does work if the 2 people are willing to work out the problems and not be stubborn..If it doesn't work,then you know that partner shouldn't be your partner!!!