Why does porn makes some girls get turned OFF?

Question

A simple question for girls only. Why are you girls turned off by porn, sometimes even mad. Why?

Answer 1

The top ten reasons:

1) Most porn out there is produced by men and targeted at a male audience, and it has a different aesthetic than that which women generally enjoy (although there are many women out there who like raunchy male-oriented porn, too). Women generally like storylines/plots and softer, more romantic sex.

2) Most of this porn I mentioned has an inherent misogynistic attitude that treats women as b*tches, sl*ts, whores, and ho's to be used and abused by the men. If there's anything to turn a woman off quicker, that'd be it.

3) Most straight porn doesn't feature good-looking men. Now, there are of course some nice exceptions, but on a whole, and particularly the more amateur the production, the less appealing the men are (compare that to gay porn, where the boys seem to all be model-perfect!), while the women are still porn-perfect. It stems from whom the target audience is, of course (generally, men), and the mistaken idea that the only thing anybody is looking at is that 10 inch penis . . . but women tend to enjoy the whole package- handsome faces, sexy bodies, everything. No wonder women don't go ga-ga for it.

4) It makes us feel bad about ourselves. Women are infamous for our comparisons to pretty much every other woman out there, and if that's already a blow to our self-esteem, then watching porn, or knowing that most men out there watch it, is the ultimate nail in the coffin- because who can measure up to those bleach-blonde, liposuctioned, silicone-filled models? Women worry that the reason men watch porn is because they're dissatisfied with the women that they have at home and wish they could have porn stars instead. Nobody wants to watch or condone something that makes them feel so insecure and self-doubtful.

5) Most porn doesn't feature much in the way of real female sexuality. I once heard a female porn reviewer joke that if you added up all the male-on-female cunnilingus scenes in the entirety of porn, it still wouldn't last longer than five whole seconds. And while that's exaggeration, it's a sad truth- women in porn either don't have orgasms at all, or the actresses fake really bad ones. The cunnilingus, fingering, clitoral stimulation, if there at all, are usually pretty bad and inept. In reality, women take a while to get aroused, and statistics overwhelmingly show that women do not, in fact, usually orgasm from the ol' in-and-out pumping, but through clitoral stimulation instead. Try and find that reality in porn, though, and you won't. What woman wants to watch something that doesn't feel real, that she can't relate to?

6) Some women don't like porn on the basis that it's degrading and objectifying to women, that the industry is harmful to the actresses, etc., etc.. And given some of the porn that's out there and the horror stories, I wouldn't exactly say they were off-base in that feminist assumption. Still, I very strongly feel that Andrew Dworkin and her like are wrong- not all porn is inherently degrading. But women often come from the standpoint that men are perverted horndogs who only want women for sex and their bodies, and when they see porn that reinforces that idea, they are not only turned off sexually, but completely disgusted by the very idea of porn itself.

7) Some girls just don't like porn, just like there are some guys out there who don't. It's just a personal preference.

8) Women may view porn as cheating if it's watched in a relationship. I don't agree with that viewpoint, but some women believe that by fantasizing about being with another person, it is an affair of the heart/mind, and that isn't cool. And if you feel your partner is cheating on you, of course you're going to be pretty angry and ticked off.

9) Women can't connect with a lot of the acts portrayed in porn that is produced for men- things that may turn men on, like double penetration, the concept of c*m sl*ts who take multiple ejaculations, etc., etc. will probably have most women running for their lives, forever branded with a fear of what they think most men secretly want to do to them, and understandably so.

10) Women are socialized to not be interested in sex. Even as things are getting better than they were, say, in the 50's, still, female sexuality gets put on the back burner. Boys are encouraged to masturbate and look at pornographic materials (i.e. the whole fathers giving their sons Playboy magazines at puberty), or at least their sexuality is turned a blind, indulgent eye, but girls are rarely encouraged to masturbate, are definitely not provided any female-oriented sexual materials, and their sexual innocence is closely guarded, the idea of virginity lauded (whereas sexual conquest is expected for boys), and basically, being a sexually-minded female is synonymous with being a sl*t or a dirty girl. Most women don't even begin to seek out porn because they feel ashamed, embarrassed, don't know that porn made for women exists, etc., etc..

Many women actually do enjoy porn- it just takes a special type. You can find porn that appeals to women in a variety of venues nowadays:

Comstock Films (http://www.comstockfilms.com/

http://erotica-readers.com/ERA/AM/Porn_For_Couples.htm

http://erotica-readers.com/ERA/AM/Porn_Lite.htm

Softcore erotic productions like those of Playgirl TV.

Anything produced by Carol Queen, Annie Sprinkle, Candida Royalle, Tristan Taorminio, Nina Hartley, Veronica Hart, Betty Dodson is guaranteed to be a pretty good bet.

But remember that some girls don't like porn, or some may have difficulty gettin over their fears and anger about it. Don't push her.

Hope that helps.

Answer 2

I Think It Just Depends On The Person. I Know Some Men Who Really Don't Care For Porn, And I Know Some Women Who Are Just Fine With It. Honestly, I Have No Problem With It, My Boyfriend And I Watch It Together. I Guess Some Porn Could Be Degrading To Women But Their Are Some Porn Out There Where The Woman Is In Control, And Calls All The Shots. It's Just Different Women's Opinion.

Answer 3

1

Answer 4

Love not all girls, some yes and maybe they are old fahion that when they see a porn movie,it made them feel bad for a reason that they can only tell you. Some will feel dirty when they see a woman doing porn , just imagine a woman getting paid for doing it infront of a camera, where is the respect on that when it comes to a woman, don't you agree?? And yes there are that never really pay attention,cause it help their men to learn and see how to please the women, And this is what I can tell you for being bias on both side....

Answer 5

It is geared for men's fantasies not women's. Women read romance novels for this reason. Women (in god majority) need the romance and emotion to go with sex...or some element of eroticism. In other words not gratuitous, obviously staged, and over acted sex that is found in porn. It is off putting to most women. This is in general...there are exceptions. But the most part, your apt to get more action out of your girl if you put on Jerry McGuire than the latest sex tape.

Answer 6

For the most part, it is rather degrading to women.
When a woman is in porn, it is expected that she be with all kinds of men and women.
A man, on the other hand is only required to be with women.

Then when you have the woman being passed from one man to another and then another, it makes women out as "meat" for a man's pleasure.

Plus, the porn stars are getting it in every orifice, having ejaculate squirted at them from all angles, and eating it too.

For most women, we associate sex with love and passion. The porn stars make it whorish and nasty.

Answer 7

When a woman is with a man that is who she wants to be with....the porn is like having more people in the bed room ....more people for her partner to concentrate on. Unless she likes to ask people to join the two of you leave the porn at the poker games.

Answer 8

I personally am not turned off by it , but if I found out that my man was watching it without me, then thats where I would get mad......If a man is goign to watch it then he should watch it with his girl! I think the women that are "against" it is because of a reliogious belief or an insecurity! :)

Answer 9

Because it makes some of us feel that we cannot possibly "compare" or "measure up" to what you guys like. Seriously...wouldn't you feel a wee bit uncomfortable, if you came home and found your girl had been surfing big, buff, well-hung men? It's just that we sometimes feel inferior. That's all.

Answer 10

Male & Female brains are different..
There is a porn designed for women (Erotic Romance)..
womens brains are more different than mans brains than
womens bodies are different than mans bodies...