My wife is having an adulterous affair, and i have justification in the Bible to divorce her. But not yet.?

Question

I want to challenge God for a solution, especially because of my our innocent children. I have entered for a praying warfare programme with my pastor to pray for the restoration of my marriage; and the binding of her spiritual husband and evil weapons fashioned against my marriage (with 4 female children aged 3-10). Can i give God a time ultimatum, as I cannot wait for too long or indefinitely for a miracle? Serious answers please.

Communicating with her has been difficult, if not impossible. She's very quick to loose her temper. I belive she does not know what she is doing. We had problems, but she is impatient with counselling

Answer 1

i know you're thinking of your children, which people often DON'T, since the mainstream religion is "worship thyself".

However, in this case, you are rightly justified to divorce. Infact, by moving on and away from this woman, there is a better chance that your children might resolve to find another mother figure (whoever she may be) who will help them to develop a better sense of morality and who is a better role model. It's not too late to move on!

Answer 2

Hello,
First I think you are doing the right thing by asking for help. I was the one who was the cheater, and my ex wife finely had enough. I did not know what I wanted till I wound up in prison and there I learned that I needed to love myself first before I was able to love others. Sex was just a tool I used to satisfy a deep hurt inside.
If your wife has been unfaithful, And you can forgive then do so. Ask God for the strength to move on from this day forward. Also If you like music find the song Daddy don't walk so fast! My hope is that it will help you make the right choice.
Yes God tells us we have an out, But Jesus said that we should forgive 7x7 that's unending forgiveness. Only you can make the choice too forgive or not. Good luck and God bless your home and your children!!!

Answer 3

Have you confronted your wife? Do you know for sure she is having an affair?

Your faith is inspiring, but ultimately the decision will be up to you. Can you forgive her infidelity? If you can forgive, then what about the structure of your marriage?

I say talk to your wife - and it won't be pretty. You both need to go to counseling and I recommend using something like a mediator or another type of an objective third party. People you know - including pastors - may be influenced by other things and take sides. You need an objective look at the marriage as a whole so you can decide whether to mend or file papers.

Answer 4

I am a bible believing Christian, and I understand the prayer. I don't, however, understand giving God an ultimatum. Have you talked to your wife about this? If she is unwilling to change her ways and make your relationship work, then I don't think there is any need to wait. And why not just separate for a while instead of divorce right away? That way you could have some time. I hope everything works out for you and your family.

Answer 5

Then again, your children can detect the slightest changes in mood and attitude and are constantly observing how their parents interact with each other. This is the 'molding' we do as parents for the future of our children. You have to look to your heart for answers sometimes & not the Bible. I'm sure that even God sometimes looks the other way. Marriage was a little different in those times because women had less options in life than men. Life just isn't the same all of these centuries later.......parents have to be happy & secure just as much or moreso as their children. Follow your heart.

Answer 6

You challenge God you will lose. Nobody can beat God. The bible clearly states all will bow down to Jesus Christ. Notice the word ALL that includes Satan, devil or whatever name you want to put on him. How have you tried to pray for your wife? is it with vengance, revenge, hate? If it's anything other then love your praying wrong. You should be praying out of love for her. Also how about counciling together. You also might want to find out why she cheated in the first place. Did or do you pray together as a family? That could help also.

Answer 7

I know you're not going to like me because of this comment, but, the bible plainly says....

To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife. .

I understand your concern. There is something that your wife is expressing that you cannot handle nor control. The only thing that you can do, at this point, is separate. Not divorce, but separate. She needs to be in an environment that God can reach her. You are constantly trying to put your hands on God's situation, let her be and trust God to give her the insight that she needs. You, however, stay faithful - prayerful - and diligent in raising those beautiful girls and trust God to do what only he can do. Ultimatium are manmade - trust is devine and has no time limit. That's what unconditional love is, and that's what you are being put through right now. Stand fast and pray that God will give you wisdom in how to proceed.

Answer 8

No, lol. I can't tell you how many times I wanted to place limitations on God, but we can't. I tried and He laughed at me, like a Father to His daughter. The thing about life is that what happens is what's supposed to happen. Even if we don't like it. Sometimes He works things out to our liking. Other times things work out in a way where we can only believe satan is trying to ruin our lives. It's at those times I like to think that God has my life in His control and that for whatever reason He decided to take my life to the left, it's for a better reason I can't even see.

You pray for your marriage to be restored. Restored to what? Her being unhappy enough to cheat? That would be asking her to change. Only she can do that. Restored to you wondering if she will ever cheat again? I am not attempting to say "leaver her" because that is wrong. You are married and marriage takes work. There may come a day where the two of you can put all of this behind you, and there may not. But in the meantime, you must be true to yourself and your children. If this means they have to go through discomfort, and while you can't stop the discomfort, you can help guide them through it with love. And you can only do that if you are true to yourself. God knows where your heart is, and, more importantly, what you need. So even if your situation turns out to be nothing like you've expected, know that God made it happen and it will turn out ok. God Bless and Good Luck.

Answer 9

If it's adultery, you have the option. No, you can't give God any ultimatums, the vessel does not command the potter. God doesn't work to human timescales.
If it's reallly adultery, I would personally have to say goodbye to her. If you want to save the marriage, I would insist on seeing a marriage counsellor together as well as praying everyday for help from the Father.

Answer 10

Do you think your religious view point may have pushed your wife into the arms of another man?

Instead of challenging God, how about challenging your wife? Talk to her about it. Take the religious perspective out of the picture and talk to her on the human level. Ask her what she wants to do? If she's happy? How YOU can show her she is the most important person in your life?

Praying????? You may as well throw pennies in a well and wish for the best, because 'PRAYER' isn't going to intervene and make this go away.