Do You think there's some problem???????

Question

Hi,
This qs is about me,I am a married woman with a lovely kid.My problem is that I hate friends,as i never had good experience.They never made me feel good.In my college i had very few friends,i was very selective abt my friends.Actually the thing is I was not smart like other girls,so i had always had low level of confidence,My husband says, i try to be away from people and that is not good.I am not able to face their silly jokes and u know what whatever they joke it's just a taunt nothing else.I sacrificed my career and now i again started studying but just cannot do it.I feel that whole life my dreams are just gonna be dreams bcoz i tried and just not able to do it.One of my friend when she had friends with her,she just used to make me feel so bad and now when she is not there,she comes to my house and shows as if she is my friend.Then she will taunt me jokingly,but my stupid heart keeps quiet ,doesnt back ans jokingly.I feel so bad just keep thinking abt it and feel useless.

Answer 1

You don't think too highly of yourself and it shows. Girl, you have potential, but you have to search your heart out and find the love that you have for yourself.

Women are mean to each other. We will tear you apart and throw you to the dogs, but it's not to be that way.

Grown women haven't changed from the girls in High School....You have to decide to learn how to love yourself and accept women for who they are.....Your only real friend is your husband.

Right now I am going through the same thing.....My first husband died and all of my "friends" left....not one stayed true. Now that I am married again.....My "family" has done the same thing.....Guess what - No one is faithful anymore....So you need to be faithful to your God, Husband, Children and yourself.

Because of this I have isolated myself and am very cautious of I invite into my world. Some of my "friends" have wanted to come back, but I haven't been very welcoming.....I don't trust them anymore.

Answer 2

I can honestly say, I know what your talking about and feel the same way some days. I too thought I had good friends until something happened or the secrets I told to them in confidence were told to everyone. To this day, I never open myself up to a lot of people for fear of them back stabbing me later on. I do have a lot of acquaintances but the only true friend I have, is my husband. Perhaps, I have not found that one good friend but I have tried to no avail.
Making friends is not easy and therapy will only get you so far. The personality you have now is usually set and with every year that goes by, it gets more difficult to change. Instead of trying to be someone your not, concentrate on the good qualities you have right now. You have to know in your heart that there is someone who will be a great friend but you just haven't found them just yet.
Find something that you enjoy doing and get out there and do it. If your thoroughly enjoying yourself and are happy, others will notice. You have to look approachable and smiling and making small chit chat goes a long way.
As for your friend, I'd still be leery of her intentions, people don't often change. The fact that she no longer has other friends, doesn't mean she's going to continue to be yours, once she meets new ones. Your best to tell her why you find it difficult to be her friend today. Clear the air and let her know how her actions affected the way you feel about her today. It could either way but you need to settle this before you can even consider her a friend.
Good luck, be happy and know that your not alone when it comes to finding friends.

Answer 3

A good and true friend can be hard to find. It seems that you are very shy and do not trust people easily. Perhaps talking to a counselor about how you feel would make you see things differently and make you feel better about yourself.

My advice: get counseling. Find healthy ways to meet new potential friends that will be genuine to you so that you can trust them - maybe through a church, or gym, or other activity. Friends are so important. But remember, it is not how many you have - but the quality of the friends that matters. Look for people outside your normal comfort zone. There are so many kind people out there... you just have to find some that you can trust.

Keep your eyes and mind open and you will see the world differently.

Answer 4

If they make you feel that way then they are not friends. A friend is someone who cares, and who builds up your self esteem with you, and if they joke they do not make you the butt of it. I think that friends are a very important part of life though. I only have 3 good friends and they are scattered across the states. But they are good friends and would never treat me like that. you should make new friends. I would try a group counseling to start because you need to build up your self esteeme and if you are in a group specifically for that then the others in the group are a good place to start making friends. Also support groups for mothers going back to school or work would be another good place to start.. Check out your school to see what kind of groups you can get involved in. But never never never give up your dreams!!! If you do then you just give up on life and it gets real boring and depressing. I know. I have been on antidepressants for years now.

Answer 5

Gosh, you really need to get to a counselor. You and your family would benefit if you tackle your low self esteem issues and gain some confidence. But first you have to find out how you got there.

Answer 6

Something do seems out of place. Just open up and be a little more friendly. This will start you off into a range of experience.

Answer 7

speak up for yourself. maybe yo just never met the right people to consider a good friend ! there are many nice people that will not make you feel down.out there. good luck

Answer 8

Where are you from? This question was very hard to follow. Maybe that is your problem. Communication!!!