my boyfriend bought me a beautiful bracelet which cost a bit too much, my ex-husband saw it and he went out and bought me a ring to match it because he didn't like another guy buying me something better than him. my ex will call up my boyfriend and try and be friends with him because he wants to stay in my life, and he calls me up every day. sometimes i mind, and sometimes i see him like a friend. the only one for me is my boyfriend. what would you do? i like everything to be amicable but sometimes it's too much.
2007-04-13 03:30:15 · 30 answers · asked by maria h 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i didn't accept the ring! i dont call him, he just calls me. i am crazy for my guy. i dont like the attention from my ex, just like to be friends, and the only thing i like is hearing that my guy is standing up to being my man. he'll tell my ex that i'm happier with him. and it's true
2007-04-13 03:43:43 · update #1
why is it giving me a bad reputation? i dont call him, i dont always even answer the phone. but i am living at home with my parents and if i dont answer they will
2007-04-13 03:47:01 · update #2
Tell him that is about time that he moved on since you have. He should get over you now since you already started dating this new guy and he shouldn't compete against him since he is your new love and he ain't. It's about time he started seeing other women because he is too much into you right now.
2007-04-13 03:35:30 · answer #1 · answered by Roxas of Organization 13 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would return the ring from my ex-husband. Since you are now in a relationship with a man who is "the only one" for you, you should not accept gifts from another man, especially your ex-husband.
I would tell my ex that it is not appropriate for him to buy those sorts of gifts and that your new flame is the only man you are interested in. It would appear that your ex has more on his mind that just being your friend.
I see nothing wrong with you and your ex being amicable but I think your ex needs to go out and find some other friends. He sounds very clingy and could possibly have some emotional issues.
Good Luck!
2007-04-13 10:41:30 · answer #2 · answered by eunosgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, sounds like the Ex still has feeling for you. I'm thinking he needs some space to get over you. I know you want everything "amicable", but it takes time for feelings to subside sometimes. You need to talk to the ex.
1. Tell him how you feel about him.
2. Set the boundries of the relationship. Him buying you expensive gifts is probably not healthy for either of you.
3. Let him know the boundries start now
4. If he doesn't seem compliant, tell him you are going to give him the space he needs and he is not to contact you for a while. Once you've done this, don't retract.
Basically, he just needs some distance to redirect his need to please a woman. He'll probably find a rebound then move on to another relationship.
2007-04-13 10:41:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's time to move on without the ex in your life. He is an ex for a reason and now is the time to truely make him an EX! Tell him to please stop calling and the gifts are no longer welcome. Get caller I.D. this way you do not have answer the phone when he calls. It is wrong for you to have brought him into this new realtionship anyway how do you think your new lover feels deep inside that he isn't telling you about! Sorry the ex is a friend well but really is he now!? buying you a ring and compiting aginst your new boyfriend he hasn't let go of you and won't till' you make him! Grow a back bone! Get strong and put your foot down, nice or not it doesn't matter you have life but this guy is trying to ruin things for you b/c he doesn't want anyone else to have you b/c you still have him in your life you are partly to blame here!
2007-04-13 10:38:23 · answer #4 · answered by sophia_of_light 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your EX in an EX for a reason and there is nothig wrong with staying friends. But do not keep the ring, by keeping it you could be sending mixed messages to your EX. he may think there is still a chance and what about your BF what does he think about you having a ring bought by your EX?
If I were you I would make it plain to the EX that you would like to stay friends but he has to know you are involed and you are happy and from now on you can not allow gifts and a lot of calls..
If this goes on you may see that in time it will cause problems for you and your BF and I would hate to see that happen sounds as if you really like him.
Give the ring back and stay with the BF and keep the EX at a good distance..
2007-04-13 10:37:26 · answer #5 · answered by Tonya R 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell your ex where to get off. It's time to stop being his friend when he's oh so obviously trying to interfere with your relationship with this guy. Tell him it's over, repeat the reasons WHY it's over and that you've moved on and would appreciate him buying no more gifts. Unless you want to end up losing the guy you're with, ditch the ex. My instinct is, though, that you enjoy the attention and the problems it's causing because your new man is having to "fight" for you. If you didn't you would've told the ex where to go a long time ago.
2007-04-13 11:10:20 · answer #6 · answered by misguidedrose18 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good to hear you didn't accept the ring.
Break all ties with your ex. He is your EX and not meant to be with. You have a boyfriend now.
Tell your parents to change their number (or do it yourself). Make it unlisted. Move somewhere else.
You can't have both your ex and your boyfriend. In order to keep your boyfriend, you must get rid of your ex (which you have not done because he is STILL in your life). Your ex should NOT be in your life. Some ex's are NOT made to be friends with and this is a prime example because he is interfering with your life. If he was really a "friend" he wouldn't be interfering.
Break all ties with the ex and file a restraining order on him. Have your boyfriend file one on him too. Your ex is interfering and a stalker.
2007-04-13 10:52:00 · answer #7 · answered by Tara662 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit both of them down at the same time so both get the hint and it would make the current BF more secure in your relationship. Tell the ex that if you can be respectful, then we (You and your BF) can be friends but that I am committed to this other person now. If he cannot respect that then don't have anything to do with him. He's a EX for a reason.
2007-04-13 10:39:11 · answer #8 · answered by steinerrw 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your ex husband that you are divirced for a reason(by the way why) I have s similar problem my ex husband calls me on a daily basis I have told him to move on. He has a girlfriend and he still calls. My boyfriend hates him. I just try to keep peace and really do not say anything about the other around the other. I am riding it out intil my ex remarries and then I think I will have real peace. I just want everyone to get along You have to do what is right for you
2007-04-13 10:36:26 · answer #9 · answered by stayin alive 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dear....this is a disaster!! As a man, I wouldn't stand for that at all!!! Ex's need to know their place....out side your life! I'm not a violent guy anymore, but if an ex tried to upstage me on a gift, and called my girl every day, and even called me......he'd be in a ditch. Very disrespectful on your ex's part. If I were you, I'd return that ring to him, and not talk to him anymore.......just imagine what you'd do if his ex-girl did the same thing! You'd lose your mind!! You'd better cut that off today, because I'll bet it's on your boyfriends' mind....and he's not happy with it deep down.
2007-04-13 10:39:05 · answer #10 · answered by Chris R 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you like all the attention and you like it a little too amicable. If you don't have children I think you should stop all communication with your ex husband, give back the ring and show your boyfriend some respect.
2007-04-13 10:36:44 · answer #11 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋