why do people get bullied?

Question

is it because they have of their self image or appearance?

why can't they defend their self?

are they afraid to fight back?

what do you do if someone bully you?

Answer 1

Some people have low self image , or no fighting skills. Some [as I] don't believe in violence and know that the bully is in need of our understanding or even pity. I know that Karma Works, and they will recieve as they put out.

Answer 2

People get bullied because the bullies have low self esteem and want to exert power over people and hurt their feelings, or hurt them physically. I believe the issues are more with the bully than with the victim. The victim get "chosen" for all kinds of reasons- looks may be part of it, but likely because it is assumed by the bully that the victim will not push back. Some people are laid back and/or afraid to fight back. If someone bullies you, go to the authorities at school, work, or your parents, and get them to intervene. It doesn't mean the victim is weak, it means the bully has problems.

Answer 3

Bullying is a natural condition that occurs in every animal species. It is the process in which the Alpha (or some one aspiring to be an Alpha) asserts his status by picking on some one else. It is a demonstration to reinforce ones self esteem and/or to demonstrate it to onlookers.

I was bullied extensively when I went to public high school because I'd been raised as a Christian and told to turn the other cheek. Being a little guy, that was usually an invitation to get hit a second time. Our society teaches non-violence, but in the process of doing so, it overlooks the natural progression young men go through to establish a pecking order.

More recently, girls have taken up bullying as well. This is because culture is teaching them to behave more like boys: Being rude, sexually promiscuous, cat fights to garner attention, etc.

Answer 4

Some young people are bullied for no particular reason, but sometimes it's because they are different in some way - perhaps it's the colour of their skin, the way they talk, their size or their name.
Sometimes young people are bullied because they look like they won't stand up for themselves.
Why some people are bullied
Difference from the norm
wrong gender, race, age, appearance, marital status, sexuality, too new, too long in job, too slow, too fast
Higher or lower qualifications
Over confidence/timidity
Perceived over-achievement or success
Perceived under-achievement
Creative talent
Organisational expertise/efficiency
Social background/social skills
Over-enthusiasm
Over-inquisitiveness
Outspokenness
Knowledge of personal indiscretion
Vulnerability (following sickness, bereavement, maternity leave)
The reason that they do not try to defend theirselves most of the time is that the person being attacked is affraid of speaking up, and thinking that if they do speak up, the bullying will get worse.
This is what can be done to stop bullying
Keep records
Refuse to be a target
Consider and modify your behaviour
Do not blame yourself
Ask the alleged bully to stop
Discuss with an appropriate helper
Consider your options and ACT
Keep a diary record of the events that cause you to think that bullying has occurred.

Record:
Details of what happened - time, place, person responsible, possible witnesses
Any action you took
Any written messages - emails, memoranda - and records of telephone calls or verbal interactions
Keep this record in a safe place, not where others may have access to it.
Minimise the effect of bullying by refusing to become a target.
You can reduce the harm that bullies can cause you by being more assertive and using conflict resolution strategies - "I" statements help.
By all means examine your own behaviour to consider:
whether or how you could be contributing to any conflict,
whether you are complying with standards of ethical and appropriate behaviour - consult the University's Code of Conduct
how you could modify your approach.
But do not blame yourself for bullying you experience. Bullying is wrong. Bullying is not allowed.

Consider discussing the matter with the alleged bully

Explain clearly and politely that you object to their behaviour
Ask the alleged bully to cease the behaviour immediately.
Alternatively, or if the above approach does not result in an improvement, discuss the problem with your supervisor, with a Discrimination Adviser or with a Union representative. Do not gossip about it to other staff. The person that you consult will assist you in
Clarifying whether the behaviour you have experienced constitutes either bullying or harassment under University policy
Choosing the option most appropriate to your circumstances. You may proceed under the University's Policy on Workplace Bullying and Intimidation, or under the Policies and Grievance Procedures for cases of Discrimination and Harassment

Answer 5

Seems the ones that get bullied are people

That are not too self confident or the ones easily lead.

Not everyone wants to fight

Yet being able to defend yourself builds confidence.

Anyone that would bully you or anyone you must keep in

mind that this person is the weaker one from a mental

viewpoint and has to be dealt with that way.

Sometimes the bully needs friends or attention of some sort

not all forms of bullies are physical

some are verbal..

One just need to be able to see them for what they are

and beat them at their own game.

Answer 6

the nail that sticks up gets hammered down. Teasing is a way to train you and make you like everyone else. Fighting is not usually the best way to go. Yes they are probably afraid, but i'll tell you a secret.....

you shouldn't be mad, they were only playing with you at first but if they see it hurts you they will continue to tease you. When you are confident enough to not be afraid and not be hurt by thier words, then you will be accepted by the group, this could have happened the first time you met. You could have laughed it off and called his mother a hamster. But after a while they know you and it's much harder to change thier perception.

Solution: do not be angry, do not be violent, do not approach them, Listen to the joke they make, pretend it amuses you and try to find amusement in it. Do this a few times, then one day say something back, not in a mean tone of voice, not yelling or angry, tell him a joke that insults him but that you might say to a friend. Exchange words and don't back down, hopefully by the end you can laugh about it and be friends or even business partners depending on your business.

think of han solo in the bar on tatooine talking to some crazy space pirate. He says "han you traitorous scum." and han replies "screw yyou lizard." and you don't know if they're going to fight or hug, and then they hug. That's how you handle a bully.

Answer 7

Either self esteem issues at home like with a parent who hollars or yell at them so they really can't react to the bully. May be too scare of losing, or just know the bully reputation at school or etc. Sometimes it can be apperance because the bully is very self cofident and ambitious towards (a person who's center of attention just do it because to get attention basically). If someone bully you tried to tell them you're not in the mood. Or ask why the bully picks on you instead of others.

Answer 8

Maybe they get bullied because they can't defend themselves, bullies want to feel good and in control so they are going to bully somebody who is shyer or with low confident. They are probably afraid to fight back because of threats, etc. I'd like to think I could stand up for myself and so wouldn't get bullied, and I'd be surprised if anyone I know tried, just not those sort of people, everyone just talks to and gets on with eveyone at uni.

Answer 9

I'm impressed how much information's I got from your answerer's.

People who get bullied maybe are afraid...but you should consider the possibility that they aren't afraid...but don't do nothing... they are superior and don't want to be in the same level with the person who is bulling.

I feel sorry for people who have low self esteem and try to scare the others... they can convince the others as strong but not themselves unfortunately.

Answer 10

It is because the have a low self esteem of themselves and it makes them feel better to put someone else down.

And the ones being bullied have a low self esteem, also. They have probably been told by someone in their life that they deserve to be picked on.

They probably know if they stand up for themselves that it is worse on them than to just take it.
There comes a time when you have to stand up for yourself...but as long as a person does'nt understand that they can make other people respect them it will continue.

You have to believe that you are better than this and let the person picking on you know it...by saying.

I am better than this and I deserved to be treated better. I will no longer allow you to treat me this way. And if I can't stop you, I will find someone who can.