Why do some people say this?

Question

I think bi-curious is over used sometimes. It seems like some people just say another person is bi-curious just because they haven't had sex with a person of the same sex. I do think there is bicuriosity where a person isn't really bi as he or she is curious and is for the most part straight or he or she just wonders what the experience would be like or some thoughts occasionally. Then that sounds like more curiosity or interests on that basis than down right lust or sexual attraction. Then there is the other part that some seem to say one is probably bicurious when the fact is that the person is most likely bisexual, but just hasn't had sex, yet, but the sex wouldn't change the fact. For example, I'm not talking about finding one of the same sex attractive or identifying, admiration or indirect attraction.

I'm talking about direct, sexual attraction, lust arousal of the physical nature. I think if this is the case with many thoughts and lust of one of the same sex
s appearance would indicate bisexuality that would be more towards the middle part of the spectrum and not bicuriosity ( which might not be 100% straight but close up towards the straight part. Like the first curiosity, I think would be something that one tries or “experiments” or find how they feel about their curiosity, and from their experience would probably try it, but would probably still be, for the most part straight, because some of it was lust, but more of it was curiosity unlike the other one I mentioned. For the second one I mentioned, I don’t know if “trying it or experiment” would really make a difference, because it is already there, it’s just that the person might be scared or in denial.

For example, there are many straight guys who are obviously sexually attracted and have lust, but are they heterocurious, because they are still virgins? I don’t think so. That is why I think if the desire, lust, and sexual attraction is there, having sex will not be a new discovery. A straight male virgin in highschool who thinks and is sexually attracted to girls isn’t going to be like “hmm, I’m attracted to girls and desire and lust sex, but I don’t really know yet, because I haven’t tried it yet, or I might need to try it out to find out” You that isn’t true, you know the guy is straight, and having the first experience of sex doesn’t change that. The hormones don’t lie. I’m not talking about young kids, where they might be going through stages, but people who are pretty close to being adults or are young adults.

For example, I knew I was straight, before I lost my virginity, because my attraction and lust for the opposite sex, thus the hormones, so I knew that having sex wouldn’t change anything. Even if the sex was not a good experience, hypothetically, I don’t know how it could be too bad, I knew before having my first experience that I would desire plenty more after with the opposite sex, the hormones don’t lie. So if a woman lusts or is sexually attracted or aroused by a woman directly like a straight guy towards a woman and the thoughts or a dude lusts or is attracted sexually towards a guy like a straight guy towards a woman. I can’t help, but to think that they are bisexual and not bicurious, in the sense that experimenting wouldn’t prove anything from what is already there. I’m not trying to label anyone, but I think the phrase bicurious is not used correctly sometimes or is overused.

One other thing, some people think that a person is not bi, because they don’t want to have a relationship with the same sex. I don’t really believe that either, because whether you believe it or not sex is not everything, but it is still a big part of one’s sexual orientation or sexuality. I mean if it was just an emotional, non physical thing, I think every dude would be bisexual. Hell, I have a close friend ship with one of my buddies who I have been friends with since we were really little and he is like my brother. Hell, we could live in the same house, watch ball games, etc, but I’m not going to screw him anytime soon, and that is because I am straight, so the sex aspect is quite a big aspect, hence sexual attraction being part of sexual orientation or the physical aspect still being a part of it.

It’s one thing for the experimentation or whatever, but some love to fool around with the same sex or have a decent amount of casual sex or fling, and think that they are not bi, because they have only had relationships with the opposite sex or would only want to with the opposite sex, because they couldn’t live with the same sex or some type of aspect. I don’t know, but I think if you like to have sex or have romps with the same sex, that you are quite sexually attracted to the same sex, thus still bisexual. The person just person prefers one part for one sex (romance/relationship) and the other part for the other sex (fooling around), but is still bisexual with some specific preferences, or someone wrote hedonistic bisexual as a description. I just feel some people make up their own definitions as denying their own bisexuality.

There is nothing wrong with it, and I never felt there was, but some people seem to deny that sexual attraction is not a part of it, when sex and sexual attraction is still a big part of it or goes hand in hand with the romantic and emotional aspect.

Answer 1

I totally see what you mean, man!

Answer 2

The trouble is we always try and define our sexuality through terminology that is sometimes restrictive. We might tick some of the boxes that go with the definition, but not all of them. So then it lleaves us with the question 'Are we or aren't we?' The best thing I can say is go with what your comfortable with don't worry about defining your sexuality because it unique to you and definitions stop you from being the person you want to be. So yes, I think the term Bi-curious is over used but it is a 'godd' catch all definition.

Answer 3

Sexuality is determined by the person. It is annoying to have half way points like bi-curious. However sexuality is never black or white its kinda grey a lot of times. A lot of people put themselves in a classification even though they them could have a relationship with a person of the same sex or the opposite.

Answer 4

Hey it helps to keep it short and to the point, as you may have seen with the responses. But yes, under the guise of curiosity, many a closet case prefers to hide in the shadows. The percentage of sexual preference in a person is indeterminate, and mostly it is just a case of accepting your sexuality, and living without fear of it.

Answer 5

Dear you talks a LOT:
but still I have an answer for you .
1. Its 100% true that we all are what thats natue blessed or gives.Cant change our hormonical simmulation.

2. Attraction towards someone might be opposite/same no matters.because we likes someone the way he/she looks,wears,talks,behave,corse and lots of things are there.Sex and Like words cant be relate.Sex means just physical satisfaction but Like means real attraction.

3. Sometimes it happens with all the we like someone of same sex but doesn't turns to other way.If I tell about myself might you will not rly..My co-workers says " You are sweat","Oh.. my God: Noone can compare with your style... but it means they like me and my ways of livinig the life but doesnt hold good they all " will marry me".

4. But yes... if your liking had turn into LOVE then your community will also turn dear..I am not saying its BAD because noone can fight with nature.

5. Simple thing is that " You like someone means just like " because " Love is God" and i thinks we never loves to anyone until & unless he/she is really touches your HEART.

Answer 6

I do believe in bi-curiosity. It is when a heterosexual OR homosexual wonders what is like to do things on the other side of the fence. I also do think in a way this counts as bisexuality (according to the kinsey scale).

Answer 7

The word bi-curious pisses me off too! You are either Gay, Straight, or Bi, there is no in betweens. This is a case of black or white with no shades of gray!

If people use shades of gray, then it just means that they are lost and do not know what the hell they want, and they need to find themselves and their sexuality.



Cheers

Answer 8

Hmme

Answer 9

That is way too much to read this late at night!

Answer 10

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Sorry... I fell asleep on my keyboard reading your long-winded whinge!!
Would you like some cheese with that whine???