Why do some husband have affairs and still don't want to leave there wifes. Why? And also what makes them think it's ok for them to stay in the marriage, when the wife told him to leave. And he won't.
2007-04-11 11:01:27 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Whats a man's reason for staying?
2007-04-11 11:02:04 · update #1
He doesn't have a choice in leaving if that is what the wife wants him to do. If she is serious about getting rid of him, she needs to file for divorce. If he won't leave her, perhaps it would be easier for her to leave him.
2007-04-11 11:11:17 · answer #1 · answered by ciberpunk1 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand what you are going through , I think that this may have always been a part of him , and although it surfaced now , it would have sometime .. I believe that he loves you , in his own way , The motel thing and willing to meet her tells me that is sex addition perhaps is real .. After all the years of marriage , and being a good husband , I don't know that this just wasn't laying dormet in him .. You have every right to feel the way you do , Trust ? dunno I could the pain yes that is the hardest part , My thoughts are with you .. Yes I would probably think the same way , that if you hadn't found out the chances of him meeting up with these women are very possible ... Perhaps , it is time to let go , because , even tho love , is in the heart the trust is not .. And without that you will always wonder what he is up to or doing ... I know the pain of letting go because of cheating I am divorced 19 years now , and my ex went through with his fantasies even married one .. All the best sweetie , listen to your heart , it will lead you to the right descion .... Yes 25 years is a very long time to be married and to love and care for one man , but to worry , and be sad , and feel unsure , is not what you deserve not now , not then , not ever ..
2016-05-17 22:16:08 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would he leave if he can have the best of both worlds? If he can have a home and a wife to come to, and also have a little wild time with a mistress on the side, why WOULD he leave? He's got it made!
A wife doesn't need to "tell" him to leave. She can leave and file for divorce. That she stays would be her choice, and he's taking advantage of it. I don't see what can be so hard to figure out.
2007-04-11 11:19:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could be hes realizing what exactly hes about to lose and the affair was no where near what he had expected. In other words, the affair wasnt worth what hes about to lose. Most men have to learn the hard way sometimes. Just like the saying;" You dont know what you have til its gone!" Also somehow men believe that what they did wa no big deal especially since they came back to their wife, and that their wive should forget and forgive them when they apologize for what theyve done.
2007-04-11 11:10:08 · answer #4 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
stay...keep all his asset's, have a live in house keeper, cook, babysitter. Not to mention that it looks better than divorce to the neighbors, friends, and people he works with and goes to church with.
leave...lose at least half of assets, pay child support, possibly alimony, care for the children by himself every other weekend, clean his own home (or pay for it), etc.
sounds like the guy should stay if the wife puts up with it.
No man or woman should ever walk away from his/her home until papers have been filed for divorce, some states consider that abandonment.
2007-04-11 11:19:41 · answer #5 · answered by Mike M. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're the homewrecker in this scenario, and I'm assuming you are, news flash -- they don't leave their wives! The person they cheat with is often nothing more than sex or a distraction. They don't love you, they don't care about you, they'll say whatever they need to say to get you in bed. Then, they go home to their wives, who they probably really do love and are going through a rough spot with (not that it makes it right of the men; they're still losers).
2007-04-11 11:19:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Maybe fear of failure.My husband always does stupid things but still says he loves me and never wants to leave,he is so sorry,he will make it up to me,it will never happen again, etc.I am an idiot for believing him really-It always happens again,and i tell myself it is the last time I will forgive him.......Fear of failure for me too.
2007-04-11 12:29:14 · answer #7 · answered by Jane Doe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People do what they can get away with.
Lie
Cheat
Steal
Jay Walk
If he/she has Wifey/Hubby taking care of the home and can get away with also having some added fun he/she will.
2007-04-11 11:38:40 · answer #8 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he' the lowest of the low, wife needs to have him removed legally. he disgraces his wife and their marraige but he doesnt want to appear 'available ' for other women.
2007-04-11 11:05:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Insecurity...
2007-04-11 11:32:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋