I'm alway sad, i hate my self,My boyfrined hate me i have so much problems in my life rigth now that im trying to drink my problems away and I'm so depressed i just need a friend right now.what can i do to get over this felling beside drinking it away?
2007-04-11 09:05:19 · 37 answers · asked by Mama 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hi... i am a victim of sexual abuse, too, hon... and i'm a recovering alcoholic.
i have been in and out of counseling for years, and have post traumatic stress disorder as the result of the abuse. it's not uncommon and certainly NOT your fault.
please get help with the drinking, hon... you can attend Alcoholics Anonymous and there are other resources for therapy.
you do not have to face this alone!! therapists are very familiar with abuse victims and they can help us to develop coping skills and find ways to deal with our pain (because what you experineced has left you with a lot of pain, i know).
Please take the steps to help yourself and change your life. YOU CAN.
sending hugs your way....
P.S.... i am an admin of a mental health forums. we are a very small group, but we are caring and supportive. if you are interested in joining, please email me...
2007-04-11 09:10:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your Sexual Abuse is over. You need to move on and understand what that person did to you was wrong but its not your fault and you are not alone there are many people that were sexually abused as children. Maybe there is a support group in your area that you could get some help from. I would also recommend maybe a Doctor for the depression. Some people get depressed from to much stress in there lives that they dont know how to deal with and they start to drink to try and self medicate there problem. I think a visit to a Psychiatrist or Therapist would really help you out and you might not need AA after all. The root of your drinking could be your depression.
2007-04-11 09:14:07 · answer #2 · answered by crimson_pandabear 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need counseling. You obviously never talked to anyone about the sexual abuse and dealing with the aftermath and now that is your issue today which leads you to the drinking and most likely bad relationships with people. Sounds like you want to get over what your dealing with but you have to take the next step and see a professional. And go to AA. Find someone you can confide in and let it all out. If your bf hates you, dump him, he's only going to give you more emotional baggage if you keep him around. If he's not trying to help you either, what kind of bf is that? Its time to put the past behind you and try to have a better and happier life for yourself!! Good luck and if your somewhat religious, turn to God and pray. If He brings you to it, He will bring you through it!
2007-04-11 09:11:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that sucks i was also sexually abused when i was a child and i have a lot of emotional problems that i try to hide!! and sometimes i think it all a dream a bad dream ( i wish) but i never turned to alcohol or drugs i could have easily done so because my parents owned a bar in the worst part of town but i didn't thank god :) but not everyone is the same:) the bad thing is i see my abuser all the time and i wonder if he realizes that i remember what he had done to me. i wonder :) but it was such a long time ago the worst thing is i really love him and wouldn't wish any harm upon him :) i have forgiven him because what else can i do :) but think that you need to get help mental help something i wish i could have done and something i think i will soon do :) you can go to an AA meeting and fix your addiction first and than you can start fixing your mental health so i am sorry about what happen to you and i truly wish you the best and pray that you figure out what you want and you go for it!
2007-04-11 09:15:21 · answer #4 · answered by notyochic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen you've got stop the drinking. You are only escaping...and if you try drinking so much / so often that you're always escaping...you're gonna be in trouble.
If your boyfriend hates you, dump him. You don't need garbage like that in your life now. Tell him, you have some things you need to take care of for yourself. If he doesn't like it...than he's an ******, and you're better off without him.
Get into therapy. Join AA. Try to stay strong, and focus on your job, or a club. Succeed at stuff. That will prove to you that you're a capable person, a worthy person....worthy of liking yourself.
The abuse you suffered as a child was a horrible, tragic crime that was commited on you.
But you will not let that define you. You wont let it own you. Because you're stronger than that.
2007-04-11 09:10:42 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As one person had answered..alot of people have been sexually (mentally and physically) abused. I, too, myself am a survivor of abuse.
People handle things differently and look for support in the wrong places. I was fortunate enough to realize that the problems I had when I was a teen, related to what happened earlier on in life. I sought out my guidance counsellor at school, then they referred me to someone who was able to help me.
I did not resort to drugs or alcohol, I used my pen, and I wrote. I kept journals wrote poetry, expressed whatever I wanted and none was to judge. But this lady taught me that it was not my fault and I am not to blame. YOU CANNOT BLAME YOURSELF!! That person has a disease and whether he/she won't acknowledge it, maybe then you should bring this person out. Let the world know what happened to you. Talk to anyone who will listen.
I preferred to see a psychologist, because with psychiatry, they will give you meds to help deal with the chemical imbalance that you have. Also, if you are an alcoholic, you already have one addiction. Do you need another? Pills can only numb (like drinking) the feelings that you have. Talking and expressing is far better.
As for the boyfriend, get rid of him. If he is not willing to support you in your healing process, then you need to get rid of him, and start fresh. You need to focus on what you need to do for yourself, then maybe think about having a relationship with someone. I focused on me first before I started doing anything else in my life.
I would reccommend that you go to AA. Give them a call, or just go to a meeting. There is bound to be someone there who may help you more than what you realize that they can. Call a help line. Talk to your parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents what ever....Yell if you have too.
Find a support group of people who were abused and tell your story.
Good luck in your healing. It will take a little bit of time, but no this, you are not in the wrong. You were put here on this earth for some reason, and maybe you being an advocate for sexual abuse could be your calling.
2007-04-11 09:36:08 · answer #6 · answered by jesterthemutt2006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most alcoholics do have some kind of sexual abuse in thier history. I suggest getting some therapy, like a psyciatrist (so they can put you on some anti-depressants if needed), & yes if you are an alocoholic AA would be a great place for you to go, there will be lots of people there that have been through what you have.
2007-04-11 09:10:22 · answer #7 · answered by whoopingthatass 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh you poor thing - that is the worst kind of abuse I don't know how someone can do that especially to a child. First of all don't blame yourself for any of the sexual abuse - it's not your fault! Second - ditch your boyfriend! You should really look into getting yourself into treatment or counseling of some sort. I realize that you must feel really bad, but alcohol is not going to solve your troubles and neither is your loser boyfriend. I wish you the very best!
2007-04-11 09:16:09 · answer #8 · answered by happygolucky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you don't want to drink your problem away, you already stated that. Good. I suggest you get into one-on-one counseling and work through your issues. I also suggest a counselor who specializes in sexual abuse. The drinking is a sympton of your problems and if you feel you need to reach out and get help for that too, I suggest going to AA. You will meet other people with drinking problems who befriend you and help you to stay sober. There are probably therapy groups in your area for sexual abuse/rape victims, too. You might want to look online for such services. I wish you all the best, but only you can help yourself, no one can do it for you. If you follow my suggestions, you will gain self-worth, self-esteem, you won't hate yourself anymore, and if your boyfriend really hates you, which I doubt, you're just probably feeling that way, get rid of him. Take care of yourself no one is going to "save" you from yourself. It is normal that you are sad, you are a victim of a horrible crime and it is not your fault. Getting the proper treatment will allow you to get heathly, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and physically. Good luck and God Bless! Laurie Lee
2007-04-11 09:15:41 · answer #9 · answered by Laurie Lee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way to get over these feelings and get rid of the alcohol is to start seeing a therapist. Until you confront what happened to you as a child and start facing how it made you feel and the effects it has on your life, you will never be happy. You have to love yourself before others can love you and right now, you do not love yourself because of what has happened. Get the help you need now, before it is to late.
2007-04-11 09:09:34 · answer #10 · answered by Kevin J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋