I have a friend with whom I love to talk and even she knows that but she does not treat me as good as I treat her.
I response to her calls and texts immediately, I am always available for her.
I feel she is using me. I dont want to be a door mat but I am unable to resist myself from talking to her. When I try to avoid her she behaves the best with me and when I behaves the same way like before she does the same thing with me and then I end up again feeling used by her.
These days she is calling me once in a week.. and making me wait for her, I think thats bcoz I should be desperate to talk to her and so that I cant avoid her call.
I just dont know how to behave with her.
I thought of making some excuse but when I talk to her I am just not able to stop the conversation.. She talks to me according to her wish.. like when she is bored and when she has nothing to do. She even tells me like " the current went off and I was feeling very bored" I get by this thats d reason she is tlkg.
2007-04-11 09:03:17 · 10 answers · asked by lets_smile07 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
Sounds like she is using you. You can find a better friend. Friends are special people. I have a friend that lives in another State and she is the other half of me. It sounds like this person just calls when no one else will talk to her. Walk away! You can do better. You don't have to put up with that kind of abuse.
2007-04-11 09:12:21 · answer #1 · answered by Holly N 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know what definition of "friend" you are using, but this person seems like they are far from being one. Friends exhibit the behavior that you yourself have outlined above. They make time for their friends. They include them in plans that friends share, and communicate with them as much as they can. Sounds like the person you are talking about is very selfish. I would talk to them, and explain how you feel. If you get excuses, or the behavior doesn't change, then it is best in my opinion to end the friendship.
2007-04-11 16:19:39 · answer #2 · answered by joshua 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i really don't think that this person is your friend. she just keeps using you when she is feeling bored or when noone else will socialize with her. you are doing the right thing, but for the wrong person, and I am sure you have other friends, more worthy of your time and sympathies. you don't have to push this person away from your life permanently, just treat her the way she treats you, and only call when you feel bored, and don't make yourself available to her all the time, because she is abusing it. don't be a friend to a person who is just using you. if you like her company, call her from time to time, when you get bored or just feel like chatting. in other words, if you don't want her out of your life, just treat each other the same way.
2007-04-11 19:07:32 · answer #3 · answered by mimma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I could apply two of my rules-o-thumb to this situation;
1.) Fair means fair to everyone. You should make an effort to treat yourself as fairly as you treat others. Replace yourself in the scenario with your best friend. What advice would you give your best friend? Follow that advice.
2.) It is possible to be too generous, (money, time, drugs…) Try to avoid doing that. This is not to protect yourself, it’s intended to keep from contributing to the others delinquency.
2007-04-11 16:17:38 · answer #4 · answered by steve_monroe_2005 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't allow yourself to be a door mat, for the love of Mike. Break off ties with this girl and hang out with other friends. Why do that to yourself? You're not enjoying it, it doesn't make you happy. Please, grow a back bone!
2007-04-12 18:02:12 · answer #5 · answered by Hot Coco Puff 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
all friendships go through good and bad stages.you have to prioritise what your friendship means to you,and if you think it needs its boundaries changing you need to try and talk to her and get her to understand how you are feeling.she may not even realise that she is upsetting you so much.If she won't change then you have to decide whether you really want her as your friend.
2007-04-14 19:32:11 · answer #6 · answered by tracey t 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should set the standards for relationships. If it bothers you, find out what about it is wrong, confront it and walk away when snubbed.
2007-04-12 06:05:26 · answer #7 · answered by concentrated points of energy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of her. Real friendships don't involve mind games.
2007-04-11 16:10:15 · answer #8 · answered by applecheeks 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best friend died too, too young. I miss him always. So be available, always.
2007-04-12 13:44:00 · answer #9 · answered by los 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don`t think she is using you - you are a good friend - and she knows it.
2007-04-11 20:21:22 · answer #10 · answered by yahoobloo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋