Do you believe in being in love with two peope at the same time?

Question

I have been married to my husband now for 2 years and we have been together for almost 4. He decided to join the miliary and thing havent been the same since he joined. I started hanging out with a friend of his that he works with and he reminds me so much of the husband I lost. I feel like I am having an affair even though nothing has happened. I have looked up emotional affairs and my case is similar to that. My husband says he is going to change and that he will try and go back to the way he use to be, but I know that is going to be really hard for him to do. I dont know what to do anymore. Do I stay and try to work things out for the 100th time or do I move on and be happy with my life again?

I also want to add that I am spending a lot of time with this other guy. Nothing has happened, but he makes me feel good about myself when I am around him and he makes me happy. Any suggestions would be great because I am so tired and drained from trying to work things out with my husband.

Let me also make this clear, my husband knows about the other man. They work together, how could he not. Also, my husband is no angel either. I love him, I really do, and I always will. He is just not the same guy he use to be and he doesnt treat me like his wife, he treats me like his mom. If I wanted kids I would have them. People should have to be so negative towards this questions. I havent done anything wrong.

Answer 1

Honestly, if this is hurting you, move on. If your husband really loves you, he'll let you go to be happy.

Being in love with two people is not unusual. My partner and I both have loving feelings for others, and neither of us are threatened by that. We were both very honest with each other, and far from threatening our relationship, the confessions have strengthened it.

Too many people are bound by their socialisation, and end up feeling guilty if they don't fit that mould laid down for them, which is unfair on them. You cannot be something you're truly not, no matter how much you try.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Hey.. u r talking in a way as if u Stopped loving ur husband and that u r with him only because he's ur husband so the most important thing to do now is to make sure u want to stay with him or not.. if u feel that u dnt wanna be with him then tell him and be with that guy, but what if the guy doesn't have feelings for u, or how would ur husband feel when he knows about him!! I mean its not easy at all on both of them.. and even u.. I'm not blaming u, I know how bad u feel specially that ur the one that has to make the decision so since I'm not U, i cant think or feel what u do so try ur best to use ur mind besides ur heart.. Good luck :)

Answer 3

Theres a old saying that go's something like u want sumthing u cant have. And its true.
Love no matter how far apart or how battered is still love. Remeber why u use 2 love him. This other guy seems more like an escape from your marraige. Choose the right reason but be carefull, this isnt just about you.

Answer 4

I think you are immature and made an unwise decision to marry. Your husband is in the military. When that happens he has a lot of added pressure to worry about. You should be more understanding of his situation. It seems you aren't. It's your decision to make. I think you already have moved in the wrong direction, but it's your life. I think you are being selfish. Being married is a partnership. I don't know what or why your husband has "to change", but I think you need to address that problem yourself.

Answer 5

stay away from his friend and tell him you can't see him cause you need to spend time with your husband. or something to that effect. he was the man that you chose to marry and just because you love someone else doesn't mean you have the right to cheat. by continually seeing another person you are already having an affair and i don't think you could call a life which is stained with the guilt of adultery a happy life. you chose to marry him so you've got to stick with him no matter what. that was the decision you made and you've already vowed to god to spend your life with him, don't break it.

Answer 6

Try counseling before you give up. Please don't get pregnant whatever you do. If counseling does not work, then it will be time to say good by. Don't keep this other guy on the rope. You need to be out of your relationship, before you entice anyone else into your life. It is only fair to this gentlemen. You certainly wouldn't want to be treated any other way, I am sure.

Answer 7

YES, people can be in love with two people at the same time.
I have to say you have taken vows/promise to your husband so try again with your man.
Go to counselling with him and talk your problems though.

CUT DOWN IMMEDIATELY the amount of time you spend with his friend,go out with your own girly friends.

Answer 8

ur decion will make a avoke for all of 3 .but i thing u should give a 100% try to ur husband first with completely been away from his friend . try for a while give 3 to 5 trys u lost ur pacience then try the secound option of ur friend .

Answer 9

if you tried hundred times and nothing has change,, then you have to accept the fact that you have to move on and be happy alone or even with someone else, but along with this comes consequences that you have to be ready about.
well i say, one more time trying why not,,,,,,,,then decide which ever you think is best for you.

Answer 10

Ur venturing into i feel like cheating on my husband club the members are rats even if u win its a rat race