We are both unhappy - and I've lost all love for him (for reasons I'm not going to get into), but we have a child together, who means everything to each of us. How do you do it? I can't handle the thought of having to go through a custody battle, or splitting time with my baby. He seems to prefer to stay in this relationship, just for the baby, and does not want to talk about ending it... we are not married.
2007-04-10 23:43:55 · 11 answers · asked by ziegfeldsgirl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if u re not married there will be no battles. and by the way u need free time to go out and seek for that someone just perfect for u, so giving your kid for one day during a weekend is just perfect opportunity for u to go out and entertain your new bf. and for the child it is better to be from the broken family than to live in one. i left my useless husband while having 3 kids. they go overnight on saturday or friday, whatever day suits me. and since my new husband has wonderful country house while we go to country house for the whole weekend kids go with me - and my ex understands that for kids it is better to spend a few days in the country side. and when kids go over night we have an opportunity to spend time together, go out and enjoy wild sex (with kids inside sex can't be wild). just persuade your man that whatever u do is better for the child
2007-04-10 23:51:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The thing is, if you have a child with someone, you hook yourself up for the rest of your lives. Court, custody battle, all of it is harsh and expensive, but it's all trivia in the end. You both will have to work together to raise this child. If he takes an interest in the child he is going to be standing there through every event in this child's life. I am not suggesting you stay together, but that you remain friends. This is going to be a long relationship!
2007-04-10 23:53:47 · answer #2 · answered by omgithinkiknow 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what is best for you and the baby get out. Since he is the child's father he has rights. Decide on visitation rights for him and child support. As long as the two of you work together on what is best for your child the baby will be fine. Settle on what days he can have the baby and tell him though the relationship did not work out you want him in your child's life and the two are you need to work out a visitation schedule that is fair but it is unfair to stay in a relationship that neither of you are happy with because in the end this will hurt your child. This child is his child also and you will have to let him have visitation with his child. Decide on what is right for your child regarding seeinghis or her dad and stickto it.
2007-04-11 00:05:39 · answer #3 · answered by bbinqueens33 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you both are not happy, then the child will know that it's a unhappy home.This is a hard thing to go through, I know it is heavy on your heart. If you really want to go, then you will have to pack up and take whatever coming. You don't leave much room for anything else except stay there.
2007-04-14 15:40:10 · answer #4 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, if you are not married there will still be battles because he is the paternal father.
You don't love him and he doesn't love you. I can understand the feelings of mutual love for the child. Try co-habitation. It might work but being you both are the parents of the child then there is going to be problems.
2007-04-11 00:13:17 · answer #5 · answered by Magicman 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you could try relationship counselling but if u know for sure there is no love left between you then it is best to part for it wioll be worse for the child in the end who will grow up being torn between parents who dont love eachother and he/she will sense this as they get older.....it is important to leave on good terms so try to tell him that is is for the best im quite sure he will listen and realise that you both can still be the best of friends 4 ur babies sake.......... most of the time the child remains custody to the mother unless she is proven unfit and the child is in danger .... usually and then the child will see the father every second weekend............ this is how it is in autralia .not sure where ur from but ............ seek advice from a family support unit........... good .luck.
2007-04-10 23:54:26 · answer #6 · answered by littlemisssaigon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd honestly take the child and leave your partner. The child is young enough to not be traumatised by your split. If you leave it longer, they will be. The fact you are not relating to each other will also be a point of tension for the child later on, so it's better to leave now, while they're unaware of things.
2007-04-11 01:02:54 · answer #7 · answered by xian 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is very hard what yu have to do ,i had to do it to with 2 kids , but it is better for the child in the long run, a child can sense when thier parents arent getting along even if they dont always fight , it happened to me when one of my children was only 5 months old , dont worry about custody eiether , the mother always gets custody unless he can prove that you are unfit , good luck to you
2007-04-11 00:24:34 · answer #8 · answered by dawn p 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are a good mother you will get the child. A child needs a mother more. And the courts know that
2007-04-11 00:25:29 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's better to end a relationship while the child is young. You can each meet someone else and have normal lives. Of course, there will be visitation.
2007-04-10 23:52:38 · answer #10 · answered by luckford2004 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋