My boyfriend and i dated 2 years ago for a very short time but we got to know each other pretty well. We lost contact but started talking again in Jan of this year. He came home for a break not too long after that. We decided about mid feb to begin dating again. He asked me to marry him and i said yes! When he gets home we plan on getting an apt together. My question is am i too young to be getting married and moving out or am i just the right age? I feel i'm at about the right age but i've been hearing different. Most of my friends and married and on their own. I kinda feel im farther behind then they are in that dept. I love him with all my heart and i honestly think that we'll make it in the long run. How do i know i'm making the right choice when there are no gaurentee's in life?
2007-04-10 13:02:10 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sorry about that i'm almost 23 and hes almost 22
2007-04-10 13:14:55 · update #1
Hes on a tour over in iraq right now and wont be home until oct.
2007-04-10 13:16:52 · update #2
You don't say how old you are, but regardless of your age, that you're asking is an indication you're not ready. That you haven't been on your own yet means you lack this experience as well. Marriage isn't "on your own." Being on your own outside of marriage is "on your own." If you're not ready to be on your own by yourself, you're not ready to be married.
If things don't work between you, how old do you suppose you'll be the first time you really are on your own - and heartbroken and without the experience of living on your own. You're talking about robbing yourself. You can be on your own and date the guy still. If he doesn't stick around, the better off you are for not having a guy in your life who isn't serious about the relationship enough to stay no matter what - a cornerstone of marriage.
There is no such thing as being "behind" one's friends who are married and whatnot. Everyone has a different timeline and there is no age by which you **should** be married and/or have kids.
If you're getting married because you think you should, how do you suppose that will play out in five years when you realize you were more particular about the timeline than the person you chose?
Not getting married and/or delaying the decision until you're more sure beats the hell out of the consequences of rushing a decision.
Take your time. Unless you're dying or old enough to collect social security, you've got plenty of time to decide.
2007-04-10 13:15:29 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not so much a question of being old enough or too young for what you want to do. It's more a matter of are you rushing into something too soon in your relationship. So much has happened with each of you in the past two years, you may want to spend some time getting to know each other again the way you are currently, before you make plans into the future.
2007-04-14 10:35:29 · answer #2 · answered by Tweety 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That depends. Are you satisfied in the other important areas of your life? School, career, etc? If you're not happy in some other key areas, you may want to wait. Sometimes when you're younger and less settled or established, you don't realize how tempting it is to count on a romantic relationship filling some other gap in your life. I was once a 21 year-old engaged chick, and it didn't work out -- and man, am I glad it didn't. I'm older now and with someone much more compatible. I think it's easier to find the right person when you're less distracted with trying to "find yourself," and most 21 year old people are still trying to figure out who they are.
2007-04-10 13:19:16 · answer #3 · answered by I like cheese 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there really is no right or wrong answer to this, what i suggest is you sit down with your partner and tell him about your fears and thoughts and see what you decide between you, what ever you tell people there is always going to be someone with a horror story of their own, my mum has a saying " if in doubt, dont" it has worked for me, if you feel ready and happy that you are making the right decision after talking to your partner then go for it, life is too short and if you decide to wait then that is fine too just dont try to analyse everything too much because you could find that you talk yourself out of something that could actually be very good for you, good luck what ever you decide wont be perfect all the time but that is what life is about if you dont make mistakes or have a few doubts then how are you to learn
2007-04-10 13:10:46 · answer #4 · answered by crystalearthwitch 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on your goals. If your goal is to get married, pregnant and all that comes with it. Then ok. Just make sure you hubby can afford all that comes with it. He needs a good job with benifits. Make that a priority to him to marry! If your goal is a career, then stay home and go to school till your parents are ready to let you go.
Caution- Be prepared to be a single parent have a skill or trade ready if you have to be on your own. Have plan "B" you don't know your hubby could get killed in a car accident or something. Have insurance of all kinds.
Good luck!
2007-04-10 13:13:24 · answer #5 · answered by Tiger Crane Master 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
21
2007-04-10 13:05:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well how old are you? You should spend more time engaged with your boyfriend to get used to living with him, but apart from that it sounds reasonable, if you're say in your early-mid 20s. It should be more about meeting the right person than the age.
2007-04-10 13:07:18 · answer #7 · answered by Hypocrite Hunter 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't say how old you are but if you have to ask then you probably are. Marriage is a hugh commitment. Make sure this is 100% what you want. Sometimes love is not enough. If in doubt, hold off awhile. You have the rest of your life ahead of you. If he truly loves you, he will wait.
2007-04-10 13:08:28 · answer #8 · answered by Jodi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one really knows of things will work out in the long run. However, if you both care about each other as Friends first, then it could last despite whatever age you might be.
2007-04-10 13:20:30 · answer #9 · answered by Legandivori 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If we don't know how old you are then how can we answer the question? we cannot know the right answer if we don't have the age..I mean I could go on and on about being to young your never to old..But I don't have an age so I have to say maybe you are to young....How do you know you really love this guy if he has been away so long? why did you break up before? what is the reason for him being gone? see so many questions on top of your question...so let us know the answer to our question and maybe we can answer your question God Bless and good luck ttyl
2007-04-10 13:12:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋