Should I go to my grandmothers funeral tomorrow?

Question

Desperately need help deciding if i should go or not? The thing is I havent had a relationship with my biological father since birth & and very little contact with my grandmother throughout my life, i seen her now & again say once a year up until the age of 9 and hadnt spoken to her for the last 4 years as she had a go at my mother and I found that hard to accept. I dont really want to go to the funeral but should I?

Answer 1

If you don't go, you may regret it at some point.

Go, say your goodbyes in your own way, stay as long as you feel comfortable.

Answer 2

Yes, do go to your grandmothers funeral. It would be the right thing to do. Although you didn't have a grand relationship with her throughout your life, there is still room for forgiveness. She can't come back and ask you for forgiveness or to tell you that she love you. But if she some how could return to you, I bet she would do just that! Sometimes unforgiveness and stubbornness can separate family. Unfortunately she and your mother had problems among one another and that also hindered your relationship with your grandmother. Maybe she felt like in order to communicate with you she would of had to come in contact with your mother. You will never know the deep things that troubled her heart. Go to the funeral.

Answer 3

I'm goin to say no on this one.

She was your grandmother and when you were a child she was an adult. She had a responsibility to YOU not the other way arround.
She didn't bother keeping in contact with you or making sure you were ok, don't let people put you on a guilt trip by telling you you should go.
She should have been more responsible for her grandchild especiallly as your father obviously wasn't.
She should have made more of an effort to get to know you and make you part of her family.

Don't feel obligated to go.
Not going will not make you a bad person.

I had the exact same problem.
When my fathers mother died I didn't go to the funneral. Many people said I was being heartless and I should have gone. I hadn't seen this woman for years and she didn't make an effort to see me or even ask how I was despite living very close to me.

Also your fathers family will be there.
If your angry at him and the rest of them then a funneral isn't the best place for that anger to surface.

Answer 4

I really think you should go. When you have grandparents its really easy to take them for granted, and when their gone it really hits you. Although you may not have been close to her she was still your grandmother. I think if you don't go later in life you may regret it. You need to say good bye as some kind of closure. You can still be angry with her, but there's no harm in giving her a nice send off. Good luck and I hope the day goes well for you x

Answer 5

you are the only one that can decide this but try to remember that whet ever you decide you cannot turn the clock back My Dad used to say to me when i was younger try to get through life without any regrets if you can. if you think you will have regrets maybe it would be best to go. The other thing to think about is you could say your goodbyes instead of remembering by the argument with your Mum.
whatever you decide i am sure it will be right for you
sorry to hear of your loss

Answer 6

GO to her funeral....without her there would not be your mum...without your mum there would be a you, so count your blessings that you are in this world.....go to the funeral and have some respect for the family and stop dwelling on past stuff...who cares about your dad?...this is not about him...this is about your grandmother...stop wasting time and get your act together.....you and your dad can sort out your differences another time....but for now....think about your nanna.....she's the one who's important....

Answer 7

First, enable me grant my condolences to you and your loved ones to your loss. I lost my grandmother 6 years in the past and located myself too, writing and then analyzing a poem at her memorial. the terrific advice i can provide a fellow author is to place in writing out of your coronary heart (yeah, i understand thats cheesy even though it works out.) If that doesnt artwork out for you, upward thrust up there and in step with risk supply an account of her life as you observed her inclusive of your individual eyes. even if you're saying would be the the terrific option subject, she would be waiting to be venerated which you probably did this for her.

Answer 8

I think maybe it would be best to go and say your peace in your thoughts-may help you move on. Just go to the funeral and leave straight after. Rem you regret the things you dont do!!!
As they say you can pick you friends....but not your family!

Answer 9

Yes I think you should. I know it's hard, but she's passed away now: and you should pay your respects - even if you go out of sheer formalities, you should. Dont stay near the front: more like you were a distant friend or something

Answer 10

you could attend for a short while to give you respect. She has passed away you cant hold a grudge for something that could have been said in the heat of the moment. You will feel better for it and not even your mother will judge you.
Good Luck !!
Dee XX

Answer 11

I think that you should defo go. I have been in the same situation & looking back regret it so much. Arguments & things happen in life but there is just not enough time to hold grudges.
1 day I am sure you will look back & regret it if you do not go.
Afterall, unless in another life, you will never meet again.
You will feel much better if you go & say your goodbyes.
xxx