I'm so not happy, my life has fallen apart so much. I give you a brief description of my life!?

Question

I have been a dancer for 16 years, I went to college at 34 years old, to change my life dramatically, I always dreamed of being in the Law Enforcement field. I had a problem towards the A.T.S. Certicate you need to become a court officer, or any field of Police force. I'm still working hard towards that goal. However, I was seeking employment in the Security feild and I was offered employment in An Armed Security ( I have my gun Licence), but the pay was too little for me to live on, and survive. My boy friend I have been with for seven long years, can not support me at all, one with finacial, or mentally. Mistake I made in life being young and wanting to make lots of money, has only dramatically made me depressed, as the years of being trapped in that industry. I feel I have lost all my dreams, and respect for myself. I don't have a career in front of me, nor a man I feel that I waisted time with too. Sometimes I feel like running and running, but I have no place to go! :(

Answer 1

no sympathy for you...eveyone has their own problems. Just pick yourself up nad move on, that's life.

Answer 2

Lost all your dreams huh? Well...despite what you may believe your situation isn't as desperate as you think. When you say you're a 'dancer' do you mean like Off Broadway type or exotic? I ask because although both jobs can be demanding the off Broadway stuff is really the toughest grind.
In addition, you went to college at 34. that in itself speaks volumes in your self esteem and your strong desire to improve yourself. In fact, all the steps you've taken thus far have been to make improvements and advancements in your life. So if you look long and hard at it you have not taken any steps backwards. Everything has been forward. maybe a few small steps here and there, then a large one like college but advancing just the same.
We all wanted money and lots of it in life. You should keep striving for a career in law enforcement. Whether the field be police or corrections, you can attain that goal. You have no felony convictions right?
Your boyfriend? Well....to be frank my dear, that can be an easily overcome obstacle. If he happens to be a stumbling block with his failure to financially then he's the easiest load to dump. Especially if he is a major factor in achieving your goal.
Are you sure you want to be a cop? I've been one for 23 years and more often than not there are times I wish I were a dancer instead. Only kidding. But the job can be unbelieveably demanding at times. You're still young enough to get into the field.
You have the wherewithal to reach this goal. You have to apply yourself once more but you've shown you can do it.

Remember this my dear.....if man's reach cannot exceed his grasp, then what's a heaven for?

Answer 3

Hey Girl I have been there pursuing something that seems as though it will never come. It isn't easy if this truly is your dream continue through with it and it will eventually come true if you want it that bad. I have felt as though I had no where to turn or nowhere to go sometimes and the fact is if the situation was that bad you would find some place to run, But life isn't about running away from problems that come at us its about trying to figure out a way around them. God will not make a mountain one cannot climb. Think of it as a big boulder in the road right in the middle of where you NEED to go. You cannot run the boulder over you may be able to move it slightly so you can make you way around it but the point is to get where you need to go things get in the way but moving forward and getting through these problems or boulders in the road only make us stronger depression only strengthens the weakness that creates it, Believe in yourself. I am still struggling with getting things together in my life but if you give up or take a few steps back it only puts you farther from accomplishing your goal!! Keep your head up and I wish the best for you!

Answer 4

STOP IT!!!!! dont give up your dreams you have to fill it in your heart and money can not be the driving factor. i am a deputy and i love it very much it the money is not there for the job that i do but i love it. i went to the academy at age 36 i have been a sheriff's deputy for 1 year and it was all worth it. when i started the academy my husband of 20 years left me and moved out. he was not going to come back unless i quit the academy, i said goodbye i did really really well in the academy and graduated. i have six boys they all had different thoughts about me being a deputy. i am the only girl in my house. i had my first son with my husband at the age of 17 and my husband was 16. we have worked hard all these years but i wanted more i wanted a career. i have had great jobs along the way but i always had a dream and i went for it. my husband came back around graduation but then when i started on the streets with my FTO officer he again could not deal with it. he left again i finished my FTO training and went on my own on the streets working shift work days and nights 12 to 16 hours shifts at times and even longer but i loved every minute of it and everything else just seems to fall into place. my oldest son is 20 then i have a 18 then 17 then 14 then 7 then 6 and we all worked together to make this work. beleive with your heart and forget about everything else going on around you and do what is best for you. My husband is home now and i dont think that he will be leaving any time soon. he knows that i just was not going to back down from my dream. GOOD LUCK

Answer 5

Dear Brit,

Life, as you know, has no guarantees. You have hit your mid-life crisis, Darlin', in a big way. There are still things you can do, and I suggest you DO them to make the rest of your life more a reflection of what you want.

1. Go back to your college and talk to a counselor. Get their suggestions about how you can apply what you have gotten from school in maybe a less traditional application. They know what changes and shortcuts you can take to make changes.

2. If you are not happy with your partner, lose him. Yes, I know, easy for me to say and hard for you to do. However, you must ask yourself if you feel that things can be changed for the better in your relationship. If you honestly feel the answer is 'no,' then you must act. Sitting in your situation any longer is a slow death for your self esteem.

3. Get yourself into a church. You would be amazed at the people who add God to their lives and find out that He was what was missing! God can change everything. You need to have His security and guidance. Life gets better when you have Him to captain your ship. :)

4. Good luck, you're in my prayers!

Answer 6

Hi

Cheer up !! there are people in the world that have it worse than you . If you have ever met a Katrina survivor like I did last year , you would clearly see that your problems are so small compared to theirs and that is what helped me to stop complaining about my life .

Life can be whatever you want it to be and whatever you do or decide in life never give up , or surrender because you will live your life with regret . As far as the man is concerned I too feel the same that I wasted my time and that is time you cant get back but with the time that you do have, learn to live life to the fullest .

C

Answer 7

It sounds like you need a life change. Lose the boyfriend, lose the job, even lose the location. Start a new life for yourself. Find a new job, or go back to school. There is nothing wrong with changing fields. You will surely meet another man. I would also concider talking to a professional counselor to help you work out some of the problems you are having. Sometimes it helps just to have someone else listen. Good luck!

Answer 8

First of all, good for you for going back to college! You should be proud. You may need to struggle for a while before landing a good job, but you got through school, you can do it. As far as the guy, you're still young enough to move on. At least the two of you aren't married. You need someone with the same goals as you and someone who can encourage you. I think you have done one great thing for yourself. I think the next step is to move on from your boyfriend and start a new life and career.

Answer 9

Can you stay with your parents for a while? My suggestion is to first dump your boyfriend--you do not need a man in order to have a good life (I know you didn't say otherwise, but I'm just saying....)...maybe if you stayed with your parents or a family member, you could get a decent job (even if it's McDonald's--anything) and save a little bit of money and go back to school for law enforcement. I know you can do this!! I'm 42 years old and still haven't really lived my dream, but I still plan to!! Good luck!

Answer 10

your feelings reflect anger at the world for not being right and depression at your inability to make it right. the general tone of your letter is one of helplessness and hopelessness. Helpless means you are looking for someone to save you since you cant do it on your own, but look at all you accomplished: enrolled for the course of your dreams, and still trying for certification. do that one thing now, get the certificate, and the job will come.

seven long years with one boyfriend is just that- 7 LONG years. get out girl but please don't latch onto another bf hoping to find a pot of gold. dont think yourself so hopeless as not being able to live on your own. You are stronger than you think.

just a thot: if it was pots of money you wanted you would have stuck with the dancing and become a high class strip dancer. you have chosen hard work and respectability. the money may not flood in but you get paid in buckets of self worth.

Answer 11

Don't feel unhappy. This is life. You are making giant leaps to better yourself. Very good. Unfortunately you have to start at the bottom and it may require another job to support either one or both of you.
I'm not sure you want or need to be in a relationship right now.
Dreams change as the wind, don't beat yourself over this. Its better already...