breastfeeding - i understand why but if you cant you get it shoved in your face all the time!?

Question

Hello

ok am 35 weeks pregnant, due to an operation i had when i was very young i am unable to breastfeed, yet wherever you go people shove in your face, oh you have to breastfeed, its the best etc etc etc. Ok if you are able i think its the right thing to do but why oh why cant people understand that some peopel dont have the choice

scrivlow - of course its not just something i was told wheni was little!! i had an operation when i was 21 due to one of my breasts not developing properly, basically, one was growing in my body and the other out. i had corrective surgery ad it was very very noticable and now i do not produce milk and also am not "connected"

Thanks to everyone for their comments.

scrivlow - thanks for the message - didnt mean to come over harsh!! sorry!! hormones i reckon, am 35 weeks gone!

Answer 1

its down to the individual in my mind. no i didnt breast feed. why? because i didnt want to. it was something i just didnt want to do but my doctors wouldnt let up but i stood my ground. i made my choice and i was happy with that. if BREAST was soooooo the BEST they would never have given me a choice.

Answer 2

It's the same as some people being really offended when others breastfeed in public. Nutritionally speaking, breast milk is the best thing for a newborn, but if you are unable to feed this way your child can still drink formula and be perfectly healthy. Some people simply think they know everything and if you dont do it their way, you are wrong. I'm 34 weeks and I plan to try and breastfeed, but if it doesnt work out I dont want to have to defend myself against pushy know-it-alls who want to tell me I'm wrong. The only thing you can do is your best and anyone who doesnt like it will have to deal with it. You will have enough to deal with as a new mum without having to be on the defensive all the time. If anyone ever gives you a hard time when they see you bottle feeding, just tell them it is breastmilk that you expressed earlier. That should shut them up.

Answer 3

People can be pricks. Its true. From here on out every little old lady is going to say your baby needs to be covered from head to toe in 90 degree weather, and some people even like to come up and touch the baby and stuff. I used to get so mad and cause a scene.

But these will be the same people that will cause a fit when you breastfeed in public. Dont worry to much about it. Just do what is right for your baby. Do what you think is right.

They do have breast milk banks, not that I would ever go there, formula would be better in that case though. THey cant test for everything....
Good luck and congrats!

Answer 4

The best thing for you to do honey is just brush it off and know that they are ignorant. You don't even have to explain yourself to them. There's millions of people who CAN breastfeed and don't... that's their choice - who's to judge?? Just stay strong and don't let negative comments bother you! You'll be a great parent and if they have a problem with something just advise them to keep their lips sealed b/c you don't need their criticism. I am obviously not as nice as you but if were me and they said something I would say... well here - let's see how you walk without any legs.. Let me take your legs and then yell and gripe at you on how you don't walk!! They just don't have anything better to do with their time than bother other people with what they "should" and "shouldn't" do with their kids/lives! Stick in there honey!! Good Luck with the remainder of your pregnancy and Best Wishes with your little one!!

Answer 5

I had a similar problem although I didnt know I couldnt breastfeed till my daughter was born and this was simply coz I didnt have enough to feed her but I totally understand how u feel with ppl pushing it to u and to have to deal with even before the baby is born I know I would have gone nuts!

Just stay firm, you know its not something u have a choice in and you know ur baby will not stave or end up a sickly stupid child (dispite what the breastfeeding natzi's tell u)

So all I can suggest is be firm when u tell ppl to butt out of it and dont feel the need to explain in detail why either - its no ones business but ur own!

Good Luck (and dont beat urself up about this!)

Answer 6

You know, 10 years ago women were actively hassled by bottlefeeding mothers about breastfeeding. Still are. It's probably just where you live.

You're going to get unasked for advice for the next 2 years. Everybody has an opinion on what to do with babies, so it's best to just thank them and change the subject. You do not have to discuss your choices.

Answer 7

Are you sure you are unable to breastfeed or is this the information that you have been told since you were tiny?

For an unbiased sympathetic exploration of your (unique as we all are) circumstances may I reccomend La Leche League who will give you unbiased facts and respect you as a mother. They may be able to supply you with some unfogettable lines to deflect unwanted critisim, they may even help you to breastfeed. The one thing they won't do is undermine you as a mother. Whether you breastfeed or not you will still be the most important person in your baby's life, so go on enjoy ....


Louise

Answer 8

Iwas also unable to breastfeed due to certain circumstances. People should mind their own business and not pass judgement on others who dont breastfeed. Good luck with baby

Answer 9

The extra your infant drinks, the extra your physique will make. the fewer your infant drinks, the fewer your physique will make. in case you maintain on breastfeeding your milk won't dry up. some human beings breastfeed for some years. if your acquaintances milk dried thats because of the fact they stopped breastfeeding or according to risk something else medically incorrect. once you first initiate breastfeeding your physique makes a large number of milk. yet, it is going to quiet down as quickly as your physique figures out how lots to make...that's desperate via how lots you feed.

Answer 10

Ok i had the same problem i tried for weeks and weeks with my first but could i heck do it and i had everyone on my back about it apart from my close family because they know how hard i tried with the twins yet again it was shoved down my throat and with my fourth child it was shoved in my face, i hated it knowing that i coudn't do it, if you can't do it then you can't do it people should just butt out and keep there opinions to thereselves but they must think there perfect being able to do it so they try to tell others what to do tell them its none of there buisness and your doing your best(sorry can't help but chunter but i totally agree with you)
Any way congrats and i hope all goes well for you

Answer 11

Its one of those things where people stick their noses where it doesn't belong. Its hard, but try to ignore them, or simply tell them you have a medical condition which prevents you from breastfeeding. That should shut them up and hopefully make them feel stupid for asking such a personal question.

I tried breastfeeding my preemie twins for 3 months. I mostly ended up pumping because they didn't really have the strength to nurse. No one really said anything directly, but I felt the judgement from nursing moms.

I feel people should mind their own business when it comes to breastfeeding. Too many people sticking their noses where it doesn't belong. Can you imagine telling a mother she isn't allowed to breastfeed because it offends someone? WTF?! I would tell them their stupidity offends me! People are stupid. Stupid should hurt. I'm working on that one, lol. Best of luck hun.