Advice Me I got married 3.5 yrs. before, I found my wife very hyper & hash to everyone?

Question

I got married 3.5 yrs. before, I found my wife very hyper & hash to everyone
In my family. So many times I tried to make her understand but she refuses to listen to me
As her stubborn nature. I’m a social businessman but she never understands my problems
& difficulties.Becase of her this aggressiveness I lost my newly born baby.
Now she blames on me for this accident every time. After this I underwent to depression.
But still her behavior is same. (After 2 months of my marriage we found she is suffering from psoriasis so I took her to Doc.he told us the treatment will start after pregnancy
Then after all these I took her to Doctor He said while the course of medi. We should not try for baby, but even she does not take the medicines)
E
Once I tried to tell my in-laws about my problem but they
Again blamed me for these all.
These all happened 2 yrs. back, after these all her mother got sick seriously (she loves her widow mother lie anything)
She stayed couple of months with her. When she came back again she is behaving same.
Kindly help me How to solve this problem as I can't discuss this with my mother-in-law & other relations.

Answer 1

She requires a physiologist. Such people cannot be mended in a day or so but require proper physiological therapy. Hyper nature, harshness, stubbornness, is all such issue which only proper qualified person can treat. You need not bother for getting a baby now till she is mentally fit to take such a responsibility. As far her mother is concerned she is putting oil in the fire so try restrict her going to her home so often. This old lady herself a widow is more self centered & is not allowing your family to prosperous. Don’t waste times in here get hold of some good Physiologist & get her treated right way.

Answer 2

I am assuming you are East Indian, so my advice is based on what I have learned about India as a culture. In India, it is expected that a woman be understanding and that she compromises constantly. However, rarely does a man make the attempt to understand her problems. You say that she does not understand you, despite your attempts to make her understand, but have you also made the attempt to understand her? As the daughter of a widow, she has probably grown up in an environment where her mother was always maligned by society as inauspicious and bad. She has probably developed an extrem sense of assertiveness because she has learned just how unfair society can be.

I am very sorry about the loss of your child, but how did her aggressiveness cause a death? Was it genuinely an accident? Or does she really feel you were responsible for it?

The only advice I'll give you, friend, is this. If your wife loves her mother unconditionally, it means she has the capacity for unconditional love. Rarely are problems in a marriage solely caused by one person as it takes two hands to clap. Along with examining the issues she has brought, also try and see if you have done your part. If you have been an exemplary husband, understanding, kind and considerate and she has continued to act like a harpy, than difficult as it is, it might be time for you to visit a marriage counsellor. Most of these people are extremely discreet and no-one will know that you are seeking help.

But my understanding of most Indian men has been that we expect all the kindness and understanding in the world, without giving it to our partners. Indian women by nature, have been socialized into doing their best for their families, and husband, and if a woman departs from this trend, in many cases it is because the husband expects all these things from her without giving her any in return. Hindus said it even before Christians that treat others like you would like to be treated yourself, and I think that would make a huge difference in our marriages.

Good luck, friend.

Answer 3

Your problem is serious and really you are facing tremendous mental tension, above all you have lot you newborn baby.
As far as I can give solace to you but only solace will not help to lead a life.
The flowing things are required to be verified (1) Does your wife had any affair with any body and she was not married with that boy.
(2) Is it an arranged marriage ?
(3) If so who has brought this information
(4) Get her bio data from him
(5) Whether she was ever been a patient of depression ?
(6)Try to speak to her a lot
(7) Take her to some other place as s trip/tour
(8) If she does not improve she must be taken to psychiatric
(9)And if it proves she is a patient process divorce paper
(10)And get rid of her

Answer 4

In such a short span of married life, it is difficult to pass judgement on your wife. Let her come to terms with you and your world. You have a responsibility to her. She has a right to your whole love and support now. Obviously, there is some tension in your family, due to some incident, which resulted in the loss of a child. You have to be level headed. Instead of doing the blame game, better to comfort each other.

Answer 5

1. Please send me yours and your wifes birth date, time and place.
2. It seems she does not trust you!
3. Where are you staying, if you at Ahmedabad in India you can come with your wife to me, I will councel her and she will be fine.
4. If you are staying away, you need to work by which she develops fainth in you, you do not pin point mistakes in her. see positive things in her and tell her those.

There are many such thing, you may even consult a doctor.

Answer 6

It is no use living with your partner without love. When neither of you can get along with the other. Then the best thing is to separate- divorce and find love with someone else, its not too late. Remember "WE HAVE BUT ONE LIFE TO LIVE"

Good luck

Answer 7

Even I , after hearing of you losing your child, cannot be myself, you people know what I am talking about. I am not going to reply to this. Yeah, even human cockroaches have a heart!!!!!!!

Answer 8

divorce this nut bag and find a more suitable wife. your life will be much happier in the gone run

Answer 9

for once jus think that whether u have commited any big mistake for which ur suffering now. if not divorce her or jus dont expect anything frm her.

Answer 10

if she isn't willing to take steps to change her behavior or get treatment you may want to consider divorcing her. she doesn't seem to find anything wrong with her behavior so she won't want to change it, and if she won't change then nothing is going to get any better for you two.