my about to be wife hates sex. what can i do to make that change.?

Question

i try geting her ready and everything but she always say tomarrow. man i think this may tear our marrige appart, what am i doing wrong. help me ladys and tell me what you would want a man to do. i want it every other day. but i can give it every day. fa real dont think im playing. i need help with this

Answer 1

Something is either a)subconsciously affecting her libido, or b)she's uncomfortable with herself/you/something else in her life. It could be a stressful time for her, she could have bad past experiences, she may not approve of how she looks, so many things can affect this kind of attitude. The important thing is to be supportive but tell her how you are feeling. Maybe you can both see a counselor to find the root of her feelings and you can help her work it out together.

But if there is just a definite lack of sex drive without a reasonable physical/mental issue, you are just going to have to accept this and learn other ways to appreciate each other or rethink your decision to get married.

I hope it works out for you both!

Answer 2

Why are you assuming you're doing something wrong? Everybody has different sex drives. Maybe hers is just very low. You could encourage her to see a doctor, because it might be something correctable, but she might not want to fix it. She might like not having sex. If that's the case, you seriously have to decide if this is a deal-breaker. Can you spend the rest of your life living like brother and sister? If not, then calling off the wedding now would be a heck of a lot cheaper and easier in every possible way than a divorce later down the road. Think of it as doing yourselves both a favor.

Answer 3

Sounds like she has some issues with sex and quite honestly this is going to create a problem if you two get married. There may be nothing you can do at all, but you won't know unless you ask her this question. She is the only one who can really tell you what is going on and why. Try talking to her, letting her know how much you care for her and desire her. See if she will tell you the problem.

If she won't you may want to rethink getting married. Sex isn't the most important thing in marriage, but it is a big part and if you two are so different in your sexual wants and desires it's going to be a huge problem later.

Answer 4

Perhaps you should think of what excites her? Or maybe you can discuss with her on the finer points and experience it together rather than having a one sided sexual affair.

Go with the touch not the sex.. get her feel emotional in love.. Guess thats why you guys are married rite?... Assure her no sex for the moment if she is afraid as this takes time for some girls....

Gor for Oral for the time being and see how it works out...... Don't get desperate... just keep yourself cool...

Have fun....

Answer 5

Don't get married. I would talk to her about why she's so uncomfortable with sex. You need to be able to communicate with her before getting married. There may be under-lying issues from her past that she hasn't dealt with or maybe she just isn't into it. At any rate you can't go into a marriage thinking that she will change or that the problem will go away. Get help.

Answer 6

Well just don't go for it full force a woman loves to be caressed first of all gentle soft hands if you have to put lotion or oils on is a plus for massages foreplay! explore every part of her body right?! Kamasutra is great and the exotic oils and tastey sweets are a godsent we got a kit and it works wonders for the male and female she will come around. im sure if the shoe was on her foot im sure she'd give you time and don't treat her like a piece of meat ok good luck.

Answer 7

Dude, think twice about marrying her because it's not going to be any better once you are hitched. There is nothing wrong with a high sex drive or a low sex drive, but it can be a disaster when those two opposites try and make it work.

Answer 8

If there is one thing I have learned in my marriage, about to be divorce, it's >You can NOT change ANYONE. If she is this way before marriage its just going to be 10 times that when you are married. I would sit her down and find out what is going on. Maybe she can go to the doctor and take medication that will increase her sex drive.

Answer 9

for starters try premarital counsel ling to see if this is a real problem, the worst thing you can do is proceed with this marriage and have this sex problem between you. since sex is part of communication in a marriage this should be resolved before you say I do. there is a book I recommend ( communication, sex and money) by Edwin Louis Cole

Answer 10

Believe it or not she could have something wrong medically that could cause low sex drive. If that's not it and you are having that kinda problem now I hate to tell you it is probably only going to get worse unless you give her one really gooooood night to change her mind. Good Luck.