I've been in this relationship for 9 yrs. Tony has left me for other women three times, has had several women call our home, and he physically abused me a couple of times. The third time he left me, I started dating and began to build up my self esteem. We were separated for about 4 months when he and his new woman parted. I had no plans on excepting him back into my life. One night while I was at work, he broke into my house. When I came home, the abuse began again. I did not call the police because I did not want him to go to jail. I just wanted him to stop hitting me! Needless to say, I gave in. Now its starting all over again. He's calling her 3 or 4 times each month. I called my ex because his mom died and Tony was livid. I feel like I am always competing with her for his love. I know that leaving would be best but I feel the need to be his caretaker. Why do I feel this way and how can I just let go when he keeps coming back?
2007-04-08 14:48:42 · 5 answers · asked by carmelious435 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You've made a choice to be his caretaker/punchbag and as an adult you must take responsibility for your choices.
2007-04-08 15:03:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
THINK. if he can hit you once, he can do it again. sometimes, one has to have the courage to say NO and learn when the pain/hurt has to STOP.
get a restraining order. you DONT need to be his caretaker. i guess you just feel that way because you feel that it's your fault why he turned out that way, why left you, abused you, etc.
why not try changing your name or move out of state or even out of the country just to get away from him? and get some help with some women's organizations that are geared towards helping women who has been abused, physically and many others.
2007-04-09 04:32:24 · answer #2 · answered by miburoen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know you feel like you need to take care of him but you NEED to get out of this relationship. the bottom line is the guy is a disrespectful jerk and you need to tell him its over for good. make sure you are not at home alone though because he may start abusing you. you could do it with a friend or family member you trust with you. you cant let this idiot ruin your life.
2007-04-08 22:08:08 · answer #3 · answered by CoCoa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Sweety, get that restraining order, change the locks on your doors, and if you are married to him, divorce him.
This is a dangerous, self-centered man, and sad-to-say he only cares about himself and HIS needs , not yours.
And YOU deserve better!
Dump him, and spend some time healing, and some time loving yourself, and move on to greener pastures.
2007-04-08 22:05:05 · answer #4 · answered by rose_32008 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get a cop to give him a nice restraining oder
he NEEDS to do SERIOUS jail time
you need to stay away and if he contacts YOU call a cop every time till he goes AWAY!
2007-04-08 21:52:00 · answer #5 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋