Who in India would you then blame for such a steep rise in Divorces and Desertion?

Question

This is in continuation to my previous question "Why Has cases of Divorce and Desertion all of a Sudden increased in India??"

Who is to be blamed to encourage destruction of young children (future of the country) of such broken Marriages?

Is it the Man? - If this was true the number of Divorces would have been higher from time immemorable in India.
Is it the Woman? - Is the woman stupid to do so?
Is it the Parents of the Man?
Is it the Parents of the Woman?
Is it the Gender Biased Laws encouraging destruction of Marriage?
Is it the idiotic Indian Law Makers making such Laws without analysing and studying the loopholes?

Note: I am not against the laws protecting Women against Violence in any form - infact do support such laws. But am against the misuse of these Laws for pure vested Financial Interests and even upon proving the misuse, the misuser is not automatically punished. What I seek is this small addition to stop Misuse and there by decrease breakup of marriages.

Keep reading below answers you'll realise how personalised the women get and keep pointing fingers not realsing there are 3 pointing back.

And to all you Non-Indians this thing like bride burning and Dowery are stories of the past and not followed amoung the educated any longer.

These topics are still buring due to the fact that in the name of these there is a lot of blackmails and estortions taking place.

Bottom line which many of these ladies do not understand is they end up spoiling their own lives and being single till their ends - 4/5yrs from the time they get into this divorce they then beging to curse themsleves

Answer 1

Modern Girls have to understand that marriage is no ticket to moon. If they hate Indian culture so much they should make it clear to the Guy well before marriage.

Today's problem is Girls do not speak up their mind before marriage to the Guy and start blasting him 24*7 after marriage.

Any girl who hates Indian culture, either should not marry or marry outside India.

This is no Divorce Formula to rising India !!!!!!!!

Answer 2

I am a conservative male and not in favour divorce as a normal option for women. But, I do not approve of any measure for removal of divorce from the statute book. While I salute Indian woman hood for nurturing the motherhood and the values of the family life, by undergoing a lot of suffering, we have come to a stage where we must say 'enough is enough'. They should no longer be pushed around without any alternative from a hopeless situation. In deserving cases, they should have the freedom to come out of a hopeless marriage. I think the society is so changed that they no longer consider divorce as an immoral act and a taboo.

Answer 3

Each individual has wrongly manipulated it's freedom. That's the reason behind clashes in a family. When it comes to clashes with parents, we have the issue with elder people homes, and when it comes to clash with your spouse, we have the issue of divorce. People today care more about their own liberties than their responsibilties. Be it any relationship, each of the persons involved should consider the responsibility of developing the relationship. But instead people choose to be selfish and think of their own.

About the law, read the answer posted by "vijay m". Probably you will understand the falws with it. Each law is made for benefit of a social sect. If the society chooses to misuse it, it's not the courts problem. The problem is with the society who don't care about ethics. If I give you a knife, you can use it as a tool, or as a weapon. If you wish to murder someone with the knife, you cannot blame me or knife for a murder in that case, can you?

All the best...

:-)

Answer 4

Its not any one group of people......in some cases its the wife's, other times the husbands.....but its mostly the society and the lifestyle. The development of India has brought stupidity and many youngsters are now in love and married without fully understanding what they are committing themselves to. Also, many Indians are following American lifestyles and deserting the Indian culture. So they are having affairs after marriage and divorce is becoming a casual thing to do.

Answer 5

Nope. The increasing divorce fee may well be blamed on women and men the two. Heterosexuals have destroyed the corporation of marriage with their self-entitlement subject concerns. no longer basically that, drugs/alcohol, money and hedonism play a extensive place. to blame basically women is strange at terrific and variety of surprises me coming from you. I do agree that there are some women that act like this and have not any know for his or her husbands, yet universal that's no longer the main important stress at the back of the extreme divorce fees.

Answer 6

In short greed for money and biased Indian legal system against man. I am sure not many man know what is 498a until they get married and its used against then as weapon to extort money. Many men and the society in general feel that its men who initiate the divorce for a better wife or for more dowry but the fact is that its almost impossible for a man to get divorce. If a man wants divorce he must fight for at least 10-15 years and that too if he has all the evidences with him. But for women just few tears in front of judge and she will get it in one hearing only of course with a hefty alimony and maintenance even is she is earning more than the man. I know many men will find this unbelievable until they will get into this legal trap and their life is ruined for good. So my only advice to all the people who are unmarried please visit www.498a.org and groups.yahoo.com/group/saveInd...
to know the rights of men (read as lack of it) and the legal terrorism (as supreme court has called 498a) and the real face of Indian feminism.
A very brief modulus operand is as follows:
1] Before marriage women will portray to be the ideal Indian women even though she is working and well qualified (typically MBA types).
2] The boy (typically a well earning boy like software engineer and NRI) will marry without dowry thinking that he has got a good match who is well qualified and earning (sometimes bearing the whole expense of the marriage).
3] After the marriage the whole story reverses. The girl demands like leave your parents or you should do all the house hold work as i am earning or will have some earlier affair or she had married only to get a visa to USA or simply for alimony and easy money extortion using 498.
4] She will leave the husband in a matter of months if not days after the marriage or her objective from marriage is full filled. She will go to the police station and file 498a. The whole family of husband including their parents and unmarried sisters and kids will get arrested. Spend months in jail before they get a bail from the court.
5] Women side demand a huge sum of money of the tunes of 50 lacs to a crore for out of court settlement and mutual divorce.
6] Men either commit suicide or pay the huge extortion money.

Men think that they have got social rights in fact they have got no legal rights and soon they will be not left with and social rights if they don't accept the 21st century reality. Women have arrived and have become more greedy as ever before. Almost 90% of divorce cases are filed by women especially in the last 4 years after all the women's have started getting jobs easily. So please wake up before India turns into another western country with 50% divorce rate. I would again appeal to all men (married or soon going to be married) please visit
www.498a.org
groups.yahoo.com/group/saveind...

and safeguard yourself. As you can only take precaution and you have no legal rights after marriage.

Thanks a lot for your time
a 498a and DV act victim and an activist fighting gender biased laws

Answer 7

Blaming is for Losers like u, that's y woman don't wanna stay married to one-side-minded man like ure self !!!
They gained more education and knowledge and put them in a position where they no longer have to stay stuck with losers and close mined ppl !!! hehehehe...kicked ya right in the sack ey ?!...anyways I hate ppl who just keep looking around for someone to BLAME things on ...if ure not happy or don't agree with something, u should look for a way to FIX it not a way to blame it on someone...that's so freaking weak !!!

P.S. So like I said: Stop blaming ppl, try and fix it, and if u can't then just shut up....blaming is for losers !!!



♦*♦ Beware 0f The Gypsy Curses ♦*♦

Answer 8

If you want to put blame anywhere...it should be on education. Women are learning to be more independent. Western culture through the media has to affect other cultures. I dont think men want it to change. I think its the women who are learning that they were not put on this earth to be inferior to a man. That makes sense to me, but different cultures have different beliefs....I think women are just getting sick of being repressed.....so its the women who are becoming more educated because of being exposed to so much western culture......The internet now allows our culture into every home.

Answer 9

I have been going through all your questions, even answered few. What I can make out from all this you are in real trouble, because of your family matter between you & your wife & her other relatives. You even wrote to me for sending your problem for legal guidance which till now I have not received. Leave aside that, you have been talking about misuse of provisions by women’s those were basically made to protect them, like Dowry prohibition Act, 498A of Indian Penal Code, & even domestic violence Act. Yes you are right there are many such cases of misuse of such enactments. But who guide these ladies to use them or misuse them? 1) Police, 2) so called women welfare organizations, 3) Advocates/lawyers, 4) few so called legal experts who are neither law graduates nor in the police departments but have worked in various other Government departments as mere clerks attended few government legal cases in courts now considering them as legal experts,5) local politicians who themselves failed to even attend proper school but in order to get political mileage come out to help every married women having some trouble with her husband. Now if these people are kept away along with the parents of BOTH the couple then tell me WILL THERE BE ANY FIGHTING/BICKERING BETWEEN THEM leave aside use or misuse of the legal provision you talk about. People fail to use their common sense & go to all these people with small little matters, I will say good thing that Yahoo has started such a forum here where now one need not go to these people & get moral/legal/spiritual guidance from general public. Yes few Jokers are here who visit this site for just passing time but most of the people who give reply to your questions are really doing wonderful thing for you, enlitighting you with knowledge, giving you moral support which you require at these moments when you are facing legal battle with your spouse. No one against use of violence against women as I consider them a thing of love, worship & praise, but if any woman indulge in some immoral wrong then she must be told about this so is the case for men too. My purpose to guide all yahoo members is about their legal rights but at the sometime I being mature enough help them to solve their domestic/personal problems too. At this age of 48 years I don’t expect any female company for enjoyment which I do have in the form of my wife, but if any lady seek a moral support I do give her through my answers, so I do for all young men old enough like my own son or son in law. All solutions to your domestic discomfort lies in your own hand, once you start washing dirty linen in public more confused you become & start the wrong path, this is my personal experience, so better is to adjust amongst yourselves as husband & wife, try to forgive & forget small matters, think about your futures, about your kids, you all have long way to go, these small bickering will not take you anywhere, but bring more harshness in your matrimonial home. God bless you all.

Answer 10

Simple way to avoid divorce:
Jiyo and jine do.
Khoob sunao and khoob sunane do
Manchaha karo and manchaha karne do.
Manchaha khao and manchaha khane do.
Ladies should allow husband to use 50% of home. Normally ladies are bad and demanding. Normally males are busy in earning and ladies avoid listening.
Read latest issue of Four Square monthly, Moti Nagar 110015. Free copy of request.
Marriage is best and both should listen to each other. I day in week, he / she should say to other: Tell,. express your needs, desires, problems, thoughts. My wife is not listening to me, so I am not listening to her. I am silent. I want to tell. I want that she should tell. I want Baat Cheet but it should be both sided.