want those same people to change FOR them?
2007-04-08 08:13:06 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
It sounds like selfishness, one-sidedness, or immaturity. Acceptance is give and take. To expect to be accepted but want others to change is just hypocritical.
At the least, it is a lack of balance. It could be a zero-sum mentality as in, "Well, I'm tired of changing for you, so from now on, you'll have to change for me." They don't see unconditional acceptance as something that can be rightfully expected and achieved by both sides.
2007-04-08 08:23:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people expect others to do things for them but they are unwilling to compromise for others. I like to be accepted just like I am and I accept others as they are. it's just hard to find people to accept anyone just like they are. It seems everyone wants people to change to fit into their version of who they want them to be. Change is hard so they would rather others change to fit in with them rather to to do any changing themselves. I guess they just don't think they need to change or don't think the other person is worth making changes for.
2007-04-08 21:16:49 · answer #2 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i dont want to sound negative but , isnt that the reason why you would want them to accept you in the first place, because they want you to change!?! ... and people trying to change others doesnt necessarily mean its wrong, like our parents for example, most of them when we were kids wants us to change for the better, by studying harder, eating healthy, brushing your teeth regularly etc..... what i'm trying to say is, try to see where they are coming from first then use your own judgement!
2007-04-08 15:31:50 · answer #3 · answered by Silentgoodbye@myspace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know! I have been going through the same thing with my boyfriend recently. He tells me that he love me for who I am and that he doesn't want me to change. Yet, he is constantly telling me to change this, stop doing that, do this more, act like this in front of my parents.
It is crazy!!
I hope I helped you~*
2007-04-08 15:17:24 · answer #4 · answered by Special K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cause people by nature are hypocrites.we want the best of both worlds
2007-04-08 15:21:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a control issue. I know how you feel. It's a good thing you recognize this. Change for yourself, and NO ONE ELSE.
2007-04-08 15:21:46 · answer #6 · answered by Doodlebug 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because people tend to only see negative things in other people, and not in themselves.
2007-04-08 15:22:16 · answer #7 · answered by Tonya W 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is because they don`t fit together. Forget it and keep moving.
2007-04-08 15:21:03 · answer #8 · answered by George 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i go through the same thing!
2007-04-08 15:21:11 · answer #9 · answered by roshanap 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋